who else is leaving France?

[Lassie]

Since Christmas, two  sets of close friends have said they are selling up and leaving France. They have been here less than three years. Both couples speak good French, are living on good pensions and own charming houses.  What is driving them away? Reasons quoted are utter boredom in the winter, frustration with lack of customer service, poor workmanship etc., missing family and above all missing a social life with intelligent, educated friends.  I can see that poor health, a family crisis or a failed business venture could prompt a move, but wonder what else motivates people to give up the life here?  One or two others have also mentioned that what once seemed impossible e.g. go back, is something they might consider.  What is going on?

[Iceni]

If you/we are happy here why does it matter what others do ?

John

not

[Beryl]

I will stick my neck out and suggest that poor choice of location could have a lot to do with it.

If a person is seduced by cheap housing away from everything, I imagine that the isolation can become less attractive as time goes on, also even if they speak fluent French, what common ground are they going to have with people that lead simple, country lives ?

I am not saying that this applies to your friends at all.[:D]

[Will]

I don't think it's anything new. People often move somewhere thinking it will be perfect for them, but it doesn't work out exactly how they expected. Two or three years is about the time it takes for this to become apparent, and with so many people moving to France two or three years ago, then it is inevitable that several will be moving on now. It would be interesting to know why they moved in the first place.

France won't suit everybody. But as John says, if you are happy here, does it really matter what others are doing? Everybody has different wishes and priorities and although rural France has many attractions it has, as these people have found, some less favourable aspects.

Utopia does not exist - not even in France. [;-)]

[Dick Smith]

Lassie - no location in your profile. Whereabouts are you?

[KathyC]

People have always moved out from the towns and cities to the country in hopes of finding a new, quieter life. Most of them move back again after a few years after finding rural life too dull for them. Recently people have done the move to France for the same reasons but have gone back to the UK when they get bored. I don't think that France has much to do with it, it's a rural thing, not a national one.

[Bugsy]

[quote user="Will"]

Utopia does not exist -

[/quote]

It does Will but it's here ............................[:)]

[Will]

I might have guessed the yanks would have one [:D]

[Lori]

And look what State it is in !

 

[Richard-R]

I think a lot of people buy a dream and end up with a drama. At the end of the day, you do get what you pay for. The more you spend the more services and social life you can expect. Here in Aude 250,000€ is the price of a good area, with all year around life. People have being buying into the whole 'Place in the sun' shame they see on T.V.

[RumziGal]

[quote user="Lassie"]What is going on?[/quote]

Ummmmmm....... perhaps they're bored in the winter, frustrated with bad customer service and poor workmanship, and are missing a social life with intelligent, educated friends?

Sounds reasonable, I see no mystery there!  [:)]

[Juswundrin]

"two  sets of close friends have said they are selling up and leaving..."

" ... missing a social life with intelligent, educated friends. "

I think I might have kept quiet about that bit...

[Blanche Neige]

[quote user="RumziGal"]

[quote user="Lassie"]What is going on?[/quote]

Ummmmmm....... perhaps they're bored in the winter, frustrated with bad customer service and poor workmanship, and are missing a social life with intelligent, educated friends?

Sounds reasonable, I see no mystery there!  [:)]

[/quote]

Rumzigal you have a point.

Probably the rose coloured spectacles have slipped and I think we underestimate the value of family ties and really good long-term friendship. Money and location are not always the be all and end all.

[KathyC]

[quote user="Blanche Neige"][quote user="RumziGal"]

[quote user="Lassie"]What is going on?[/quote]

Ummmmmm....... perhaps they're bored in the winter, frustrated with bad customer service and poor workmanship, and are missing a social life with intelligent, educated friends?

Sounds reasonable, I see no mystery there!  [:)]

[/quote]

Rumzigal you have a point.

Probably the rose coloured spectacles have slipped and I think we underestimate the value of family ties and really good long-term friendship. Money and location are not always the be all and end all.

[/quote]

But what does anyone think that the countryside is going to be like in the winter - in any country?

[Russethouse]

Why do they think they are going to find the ' intelligent, educated friends?' in areas where by dint of the locality the residents have completely different interests ?

This is the second recent post to mention this aspect.

[Turnip]

Maybe they find that life in a Brit. Ghetto in France is not Utopia after all

[Llwyncelyn]

Beryl you have acquired my word 'seduced'.  I have really at length thought this through and location is one part and perhaps a major part.  However I really know the other in that I was able to take retirement and from a busy legal career and in my mid 50's.  I should not have done that............each day was different and sure I had problems with the CJS but it was demanding as was fighting the system.  Challenges each and every day and with success and failure.

Of course I could have toppled at any time but I literally did not have time to think and we have all been there.

It is nothing to do with France I came to Le Manche with I thought my eyes open but what had been longish holidays in our maison secondaire then became life and reality.

Our neighbour was saying yesterday that this area is dying there is no money about the taxes are high and she hopes for a socialist government next time around.

Whilst there are small numbers returning to the UK the people remaining very much outnumber those who are going back.  Thus it is percentages with the majority enjoying France and its lifestyle and we may next time around go back and after our next house move further south.  At least we gave it a go and if it does not work out for us that does not under any circumstances suggest that it is France at fault it is purely the exercise of personal choice.

rdgs

 

 

[Teamedup]

Sounds very reasonable to me. I really didn't mind living in the country when the kids were at home, and where I live ain't cheap and NEVER was. We didn't come to a cheap France either. I can't hack it anymore. Far to far to drive to anything which is usually expensive to boot, and too little for me to do here. If we weren't leaving France we 'd be moving to a town or better still a city.  The country is wonderful for a day or a few days out or a holiday.

[BJSLIV]

I  think the "Place in the Sun" programmes illustrate the problem.

They travel through some "undiscovered" part of France and marvel at the wide open spaces and the huge houses they can buy for the price of a flat in West London.

The  victims arrive in some obscure village and learn that its the home of the largest poitiron jam making fair in the world, and are asked if that would be of interest.

"Oh wow, that would be great" they reply. 

Unfortunately they haven't got a clue how to make jam of any sort, wouldn't know a poitiron if it jumped out and bit them, and don't realise that anyone who hasn't lived in the area for forty years won't be invited.

Nevertheless they buy, and the festival really is lively. All the old ladies demonstrate their jam making skills, and  welcome their distant relatives down for a weekend in La France Profonde. These ex paysannes congratulate themselves on how lucky they are to live on Paris, and remark that its nice to see how Aunty is looking after their inheritance.

Soon our home-buyers begin to realise the jam competition is  the social event in the village, which in fact only come to life for that one weekend of the year, apart from the monthly celebration of Mass.

After eighteen months of huge heating bills they realise  that their initial "Wow, its so quiet here"  really should have been " Wow what a dead alive ........."

[Catalpa]

[quote user="KathyC"]

But what does anyone think that the countryside is going to be like in the winter - in any country?

[/quote]

The countryside in the UK - or, to stick to my area of knowledge, southern England - is indeed full of "intelligent, educated friends" - or potential friends because in southern England it is often the people with good incomes and probably a better education who live in the country. No one driving a pig lorry or working shifts in a biscuit factory is going to be able to afford it any more. Anything they could have afforded was extended way out of their reach 10 or 20 years ago.

In France - or at any rate, in la France profonde - it's mostly poorer and therefore not so well-educated or travelled or whatever people who are our next door neighbours. Wonderful people they are - and our neighbour is - but other than local gossip, weather, farming and a bit of politics, there is no real point of mental connection. We lived in a small village in Wiltshire, we now live in a small village in Manche. They're not the same. The makeup of the village is very different. Country life in France is different. France is different. And I think that big difference is what a lot of people don't see until they've been here for a few years.

It'll continue to suit some people... it won't suit others and if they have the funds, they'll move on.

[Cerise]

Couldn't agree more catalpa - I lived most of my life in rural Cornwall and most of my friends are still there - and they do not wear the 'blouse' and talk about nothing but cleaning window panes.  French country life is not the same as English country life.  There are similarities, but not very many bits of England (even in the country) are 30 miles from a large supermarket.  There were a few untravelled folk in my Cornish village - but here they are in the majority.  There were evening classes and activities within easy reach even in the country but here you would have to travel more than an hour through dangerous roads to reach anything at night - and then of course an hour back!

There are lots of great things about being here, and some not so great.  The missing friends is one of the not so good bits.  In any case why is it a bad thing for people to move on.  Some people are born in one place and want to stay there all their lives, others move once or twice and some are restless.  None of them are wrong, they are just different.  Like France and England really.

[Blanche Neige]

"None of them are wrong, they are just different.  Like France and England really."

 

Different culture..................................... innit!

[Patf]

Since coming to France 5 years ago we have got to know at least 30 british families who live here permanently and I don't know of one who has gone back. No, I forgot one young family who came temporarily and rented. They returned. We expect to return in the next few years, and have always intended to.But you never know! Pat.

[hastobe]

Our thoughts (after many years of 'holiday' France) was that one day we would retire to France - and enjoy the relaxed way of life, the beautiful scenery, weather etc. But, for the reasons described very eloquently above, we have now decided we need to keep one foot in Blighty.  My first shock was chatting to a Parisien couple who had 'downsized' for a more relaxed life and bought a B&B in SW France.  Their B&B was very successful and their renovations had featured in the french equivalent of Home & Gardens but - their son had had a horrendous time settling into school.  His parents had had professional jobs before decamping to SW France and so he had travelled and done many of the things Brit kids take for granted.  In contrast, many of his peers in the local village school had never even seen the sea (just an hour or so away) never mind visited the States, the Caribbean, the Far East etc.  Similarly many of the mums didn't work, didn't have any academic qualifications - or any aspirations.  They had nothing in common with their new neighbours.

To be frank, with the exception of  a couple of English neighbours, we have found the same.  Don't get me wrong, our neighbours are very nice, wonderfully helpful and friendly - but they have nothing in common with us.  They are from entirely different professional and socio economic groups.

We still love France - and still plan to spend a good deal of our retirement here - but we will be keeping our foothold in the UK, and we plan to travel as often as we can - to avoid vegetating!

Having said all of that, I am still of the opinion that the UK is not the utopia that all those frustrated with life in France think it is.  The UK has slid dramatically over the last twenty years.  In the same way that the long standing French residents acuse newcomers of wearing 'rose tinted' glasses I think some of the longstanding French residents are looking back at the UK with the same rose coloured hues.  Both countries have their good and bad points - we are hoping  that by keeping a foot in each camp we get to enjoy the good bits that both have to offer.

Kathie

[KathyC]

Catalpa, I agree with you about the people who live in southern England but then I don't think that you could describe anywhere in that area as the country. Southern England is just one great dormitory suburb of London; it just happens to have some bits that haven't been built on!

My experience of living in the country was south Shropshire in the 90s; apart from the incomers (like us) many people were very much as you describe in rural France - or at least almost so. I taught at the college in Shrewsbury and there were certainly a few students who'd never been out of the county and the majority had never been to London. Where we lived was about 20 miles from a supermarket and there was nowhere, apart from one pub, that was nearer than a half hour's drive to go to in the evening. I expect many people who come from rural Wales would be able to say the same thing.

I think that anyone who moved to rural France thinking that it was going to be like Sussex, but with cheap wine and houses, must have had a very rude awakening!