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A chap walking down the road in the UK sees a sign in a pet shop window "Talking Centipede for sale £100". Greatly take by the idea he pops in and buys it, happily walking out with the purchase in a shoe box. Getting home he puts the box on the table and thinks how he can show off his new purchase. After a few moments, he asks "would you like to go to the pub for a drink" Silence More silence Thinking now that he has been scammed, he demands once more in a stern tone "do you want to go to the pub or what" "Keep your hair on" comes the reply from the box "I heard you the first time, I am just putting my shoes on"

One of the results of selling the MGB is that I've assumed the title chief chef and have become a dab hand with the air fryer. I haven't poisoned anyone yet! I've lately been making pork pies and scotch eggs.

Got sorted to go our nearest big town to pay some bills as off to France Sunday, got my bus pass ready then looked for my wallet, could we find it anywhere, no. looked in the car as its about fully loaded, not there looked all over the house. but I could remember putting it into some bag, looked through all the bags that might be used, then thought I might have to cancel the cards as we will be in France for 6 weeks and wanted to make sure they couldn't be used just in case the wallet was mislaid outside. Phoned Barclays to cancel, they don't want you to speak to humans, they asked for the debit card number, but I don't have it, in the end I put the phone down frustrated. Got on bus and went to Staines, visited Barclays there, it has just become a large room with loads of self service machines with one poor receptionist trying to sort out all the visitors. They are a joke, when this is sorted I'm changing banks. Got home and swmbo said look in the fridge, well on Wednesday we purchased a large pack of bacon to split and try to smuggle some into France on Sunday, you guessed it wallet was in the bag we put the bacon in. Where is that darkened room.

I'm not completely sure, but I think birds are excused from summer time changes.

Judith, I saw a documentaire recently about that museum and it's supposed to be the last word, in museums that is. NOT the LAST word from any of us here on the forum, is it? DL even if you are not the miracle worker, you deserve tons of credit for keeping us informed and motivated. So come ON, eveybody, put your shoulder to the wheel or mettre la main à la pâte or simply just come and post in DROVES! The forum rules, OK?

If I may, I’ll return to the self service checkouts. A pain in the backside for some ? Maybe. For me? If I’ve got half a dozen or so items and want to get in & out quickly? Ideal. I’ll say no more.

Thanks for your thoughts about Mrs G’s MS, but she was diagnosed nearly 20 years ago and is pretty accustomed to it ! The Neurology Prof reckons that the condition (for her) is essentially benign, although there are tens of thousands of others for whom this isn’t the case with MS or other health problems. Accordingly, she feels pretty ‘lucky’. The biggest problem has been her loss of independence (driving is out of the question) and so the ability to get round a big supermarket, stopping and starting where she chooses to, rather than where I push her, will be a big deal ! Its strange how such seemingly trivial things can assume major importance ?

Everything was fine years ago; every town had its own time. Then the railways messed things up with their idea of a standard time. Afghanistan has the best setup. GMT plus 4 1/2 hours - and back 600 years.

Nope, I saw one bird changing his watch this morning, he must have forgotten to do it last night😀

PS Have to add this: my parents, whilst searching for somewhere in 05, drove down a couple of times with a caravan. My father would always wax lyrical about how good the French were at building roads, (to hear him swanking about the marvels of the Bouleveard Peripherique you'd honestly believe he'd built the entire thing himself single-handed). Anyway, their journey used to take them to Grenoble, but before the A48 had been entirely completed. On one occasion my father was rabbiting on about how wonderful this new motorway was, how the French anticipated traffic levels so early, and even my mother had to admit that there didn't seem to be a single other vehicle on either carriageway. They did a happy five miles or so totally on their own, before hearing "Ni-nah ni-nah ni-nah" becoming audible behind them. A police car overtook them, and signalled for them to stop. It turned out that my father had got the wrong side of some cones (he was colour blind, which didn't help, and French signage wasn't as comprehensive as it is now) and he'd managed several miles on an unopened section of the A48. Had he carried on another couple of miles he and the caravan would have ended up in a large hole. They were escorted back the wrong way (my father got in a total panic and it was the gendarmes who had to disconnect the caravan, turn the vehicles round, and reconnect them).

Reminds me of my parents. In my teens we went to France three times a year, and my father seemed to be under the impression that it was akin to going to the south pole. Apart from loading the car with butter and coffee and tinned ham, he himself would wrap himself in multiple layers, thick winter jerseys, sports jacket, raincoat, heavy winter overcoat. We'd scarcely be on the road before he'd yell "Ye Gods, the passports". If he was driving he would have to be persuaded to stop, as the search would entail going through the fifteen or so pockets of his sartorial over-complications. Eventually the passports would be found, a few miles would be achieved, then "Ye Gods, the ferry tickets". You can imagine, and this would go on throughout the entire journey to Southampton or Dover. Famously later on they managed to leave their picnic for the journey in the fridge at home; another time when they'd just bought a little chalet in 05 they managed to leave a cardboard box full of mugs, plates, chocolate etc in a layby on the N75 south of Grenoble (a little layby off the road and très delaissé), only to be able to pick it up three weeks later on the way home (and demolishing the chocolate there and then they were so pleased to see it, having no doubt left the picnic for the return journey behind; the box eeventually got the the chalet on the next run!). As my mother observed, France was still in back then like England in the 1930s, where you could leave your luggage on a station platform and it would be left undisturbed for as long as you liked....... Eventually they DID - on one of their last trips - lose their ferry tickets whilst in France in the eighties, and also managed to lose track of which day of the week it was, this was of course long before mobiles, and they weren't sure if the copies of the papers in the Librairies were today's or yesterdays. They eventually turned up at the wrong time at the wrong port on the wrong day to catch the wrong boat. As a result of such chaotic moments in my childhood I am boringly pretty well organised, but of course one never sees one's parents' good points, many of which I more than suspect that I am entirely lacking. Good luck finding another bank. They're all pretty useless, although generally I find Nationwide (and, suprrisingly, Tesco) quite good at picking up the phone. Opinions may differ of course. FWIW had you been able to log in to Barclays Banking you could have "frozen" your card, most of the banks allow you to freeze them until you find it again.

According to the global boiling brigade:- "most parts of Europe experienced exceptionally warm spring temperatures between early March and mid April" So there..!! https://joint-research-centre.ec.europa.eu/jrc-news-and-updates/warm-spring-weather-benefitted-crops-most-europe-2024-04-22-0_en

It's the weirdest weather I have known in my umpteen years here. Planning to walk with friends this afternoon as it's been sunny and only a bit cold this morning but I made the mistake of looking at the météo. It says, orage and grêles this afternoon! So it will be lunch at home and perhaps I'll make some bread. I am no domestic goddess, moi, so this does not seem like an attractive alternative to a walk and perhaps taking some pictures on my new phone and see if they come up upside down like Noisette's.

Oh yippee, we're back! You don't know what you've got til it's gone, do you?

Following my successful appearance as an extra in "The Origin of Evil (L'Origine du mal)" (funeral scene, suited gentleman left hand side of church) my second appearance as a moving extra is now available. Mme Holmes TF1 Series 1 Episode 4. Garden party in London scene, fully visible. My agent is handling all new requests for interviews, autographs, new roles etc. 😁

Is David Lister your REAL name?

Thks Belves…never thought of all that. 😂

Dealt with.

I got some new allergies myself, and I don't know why. And now in spring I sneeze like every 5 min.

" It " ????????

It's great that they're finally leveraging technology to streamline this process. Hopefully, it'll make things easier for everyone and crack down on uninsured drivers.

Deaf Woman: I can't find my glasses. Basil Fawlty: They're on your head. Deaf Woman: What? My hearing aid's not working. Basil Fawlty: (writes) "They're on your head." Deaf Woman: I can't read that, I haven't got my glasses.

Just move house, ALBF! Goodness knows you have threatened often to do so. Sorry, couldn't resist teasing you. I do sympathise. Everyone, just keep away from him, what with all that coughing and sneezing.....ugh.....give him a wide berth! ALBF, have you had a word with your pharmacien? Does anyone know of one of those Bach remedies that might work?

I will hunt them down and give them a give them a go. I will try anything.

If you can find powdered quails eggs, try them. Mr Betise suffers from horrible hay fever, but since he started taking 3 tablets par jour, he no longer has to take antihistamines, and despite often being in our garden, cutting the lawn etc (and we live in a very rural setting) he can live a normal life. We pooh poohed the idea, but it really does work for him.

I think its just another way of making money for the Bank. Look at "Le virement instantané" . For quite sometime Revolut and BoursoBank (for example) have had these available for free (Revolut do country to country free). Its only recently that a change in European rules have forced banks to offer this service without the charges they were levying on clients. Some were charging up to 10€ for the service, whist others, at the same time, offered it free. Its always about the money.

Well I suppose technically CA can charge what they like for the use of their ATM's but I agree it sounds outrageous. One to avoid I think. I don't know whether or not this would help but I recently set up a Wise account. I've set it up with two 'pots' one in euros and one in sterling. I can transfer funds online and then decide which pot I want it to go into. I then use the debit card to pay for goods or withdraw cash. I think I used a CA ATM to activate the card and I certainly wasn't charged 6 euros for the privilege.

I've just mamaged to change the hour forward, twice now in 2 days .. as I'm back in France. Arrived at the hotel last night and said, what time is it please? Tunnel was late, which didn't help! Maybe by the time I'm home - 2 more days - I'll have sorted myself out!!

Over the Easter weekend I managed to go back one hour, forward one hour, and forward one hour again. Just got home and all the clocks are at the wrong time. Quite discombobulating.

The article does not recommend any particular breed. Shout out here for the Damascus Goat. Hopefully its mother loved it! If all animals looked like this the west might go vegetarian and help solve some of ALBF's concerns.

3 days !! I think I can count on ONE HAND the sunny days we've had since OCTOBER. Floods all over. Rock slides have closed several roads. Ground drenched in water. Yesterday was part sun, part rain, so that was nice. Woke up to some sunshine with clouds, but storms are in the forecast for this afternoon. To say we're all sick of the rain around here would be an extreme understatement.

Did the return from our bike ride on Easter Sunday in the pouring rain, though no head wind. Felt quite good oddly enough to be out in the rain. Sun came out in the afternoon for a bit. Strangely, my wife has several solar lights in the flower pots on the balcony. We have had quite a few sunny days, but they have not charged. After the driving rain in the morning and then the sun, they were all on last night. Perhaps they to have heeded the wetness and changed over to rain charging!

I just stay on my own clock. Yesterday I got up at 5am…this morning I got up at 6am…..according to someone’s clock. It will be the same when clocks go backwards. Stay on your own clock…is ALBF advice.

I think that all of Europe are in agreement about doing away with the phantom hour, the problem is that no one can agree about whether we stay in Central European Time, or in CET+1. And so it goes on ...

My chickens certainly are and I go with the flow. We base our days on sunrise and sunset 🙂

If you do not have the food supplement the goats will go and find it, probably at a neighbouring farm or garden centre!

Greatest Of All Time

You do not own a goat, it owns you!

Thank you Pierre ad albf; you are both right so buyers should draw from both sources.

There is no such thing as bilingual. AI might be bilingual sooner or later but not humans. You always favor one language. There will always be a loss in translation. And bare in mind the proceedings will be in French anyway. That is the rules in France. There lies your problem. Buying a house in a foreign country (particularly France) is high risk. But that is the risk you take when buying abroad. I would not waste my time and energy on a supposedly bilingual notaire. Well unless you are an American buying a 10 million property in St Tropez. In the op’s part of France they are used to dealing with English folks. So the op will get through it. BTW, never read any of our documents relating to the purchase of the house. Just make sure you know your boundaries and that people or servitudes don’t have access to your land.

Hello Edel: I am a French bilingual US-educated (MBA) real estate consultant/agent with my own carte (licensed broker) and 14 years experience. I primarily act as a buyer's agent for English-speaking customers. Based on my experience, here is what I would tell a customer in your situation: 1) Given your expressed needs, I strongly recommend that you hire a bilingual notaire, or even a Franco-British notaire. I dont know how many there are, but I know one I have worked a few times with - it went really well. It is also possible to work with a notaire employing bilingual/binational staff - as the "clerc de notaire" does most of th work, that could work. And when you're with the notaire in-person, the clerc can act as a translator. 2) A very important fact: the notaire does NOT have to be local. In France, notaires can act anywhere in the country. 95% of notaire offices are equipped with videoconferencing tools (thansk to Covid). Which will make it easier to find the right notaire: you can look anywhere in France! (As a matter of fact, a good number of French people, the wealthiest who deal regularly with a notaire have "their own" notaire, which they use for all notaire business - because they trust him/her.) I would ask the UK embassy for names of notaires - I have never done that, but there is no downside in trying... 3) Every transaction is a new transaction for a notaire. Menaing it doesn't matter that the house has been sold/bought at any given notaire. The plus here is that the notaire has a quicker access to some of the documents - but most need to be updated anyway, and the notaire HAS to get newly produced documents anyway. 4) About translation: you may want to translate the important documents (compromis first, that's the most crcuail one, and acte authentique later - which contains almos the same content). I would, for peace of mind. But you will always want your advisor (noatire, clerc, biligual agent, lawyer) to trake you through it parapgraph by paragraph and explain - before the actual signing meeting. It'll take you an hour, worth it. IMHO dont pay a translator to assist you during the process or the meeting - it's not worth it. And dont forget: "Google translate" is now 95% efficient. At zero cost. Useful also for email exchanges. Hope that helps. BTW: I can provide you with the names of the notaires I mentioned in the post. Just ask! [This is my first post on this forum, so please excuse possible protocol errors...]

Idun last posted on the forum January 1st of this year, to wish everyone a happy new year. She said she hoped to have more time this year to be able to post here again.

AnOther, I wish TeamedUp (or idun) could be here to look at your photos. I reckon you two could be the first forum members to star in Forum MasterChef. Or maybe Forum BakeOff?

Oh yes, of course Claire, who I did meet in person, IRL as people like to say now, before we "met" each other again on the forum. Although it did take me a while to realise that they were one and the same person. She had the patience of a saint.

Anyone remember chris pp? He was the forum's David Attenborough. If something bizarre with six legs appeared in your home he could identify it.

Sorry I was called away before finishing. The main problem for us was dealing with huge document relating to the deeds. We paid an acquaintance to translate the whole set of documents and she hit many problems with legal terminology. I regret not having a full translation and professional advice. We survived the final meeting although I am certain that the selling family lied to us and the notaire was aware of the lies. If you pay for an interpreter make sure they are not connected with the sellers or the notaire. In the end you will need to trust your own judgement. I hope all goes well and you have a happy result. We did.

You can sign remotely from the UK from your own house. https://www.notaires.fr/en/notarial-profession/role-notaries-and-his-principal-activities/power-attorney-notary-how-sign-online You don’t have to be present. All you need to do is to find someone locally in the UK who speaks French to help you through the language process and sit beside you by your computer. Other thoughts, an English speaking Notaire does not really bring anything to the table. It is a French transaction so French language will rule. Or I guess, you could sign with the Notaire in Bordeaux remotely. Forget what the agent is telling you they will do what is easiest for them. They have to earn their fees. And in France, most if not all don’t. Estate agents in France are the biggest laziest rip off merchants you could imagine. I would never sell or buy through an Estate agent. But that is now beside the point. You are the buyer….its your money and your life….YOU decide what is best for you. Not someone else.

CooperLola. I was thinking about her only yesterday. The way she took the lead during the CPAM crisis. I know there were other groups involved but what she and other members of this forum did was amazing and instrumental in changing the UK government's position. If it hadn't been for them I wouldn't still be in France.

I am sure i joined in the very early 2000s. I remember Coco, **** (short form of Richard) Smith, and other old-timers. In fact some of us made an assignation at the French Property exhibition one year. Russet house of course, and Auricaria(?sp), Christine Animal, and the marvellous woman from Le Mans, who went on an "itchy feet" tour to meet some of us.

We have two right hand drive French registered cars, as you say nothing on the CG.