DEALING WITH OTHER PEOPLES CHILDREN...??

[Ty Korrigan]

I would keep a known and registered pedophile chained up in the yard...

 That should keep parents way...

Bet Quillan wipes this one....

 

[Miki]

I wouldn't be surprised if there was niche market just for decent

accomodation in Quillan ! Friends just arrived back this weekend, 

said the two hotels they stayed in (one on the way through to Barcelona

and one on the way back that looked better) were dire.

[quote]We don't have suites as we don't have the room but we never looked

to do suites and children from day one so we don't mind loosing out on

all that money.

We like and prefer dogs thats why we have one of our own but he is

kept seperate from guests and has been trained not to lick people so I

don't have any of those problems. We have had people with dogs stay in

the past but it upsets the cats so we have now stopped that.[/quote]

I will put it down to inexperience ! Family suites also take

couples, four friends etc and count as one room, thus €102 and not €56.

Many French families, e.g say a couple and the parents of one or the

other, will accept two rooms and a shared shower room, providing it is

exclusive to them only. So €56 when sole use but better still, €102

when two couples or a family book it. Ambiance can just as easily be

created by kids as lost. A dog in our resto will certainly give us more

probs than a kid. Especially since some people book as we don't accept

animals.

Grumpy old sods are definitely the easiest way for ambiance of a

house to be affected. My bet, is that you get more because most French

are pretty useless when it comes to publicity and you are pretty easily

found plus as stated there are some pretty poor accommodations in your

area. Most of our takings from retired folks, comes from their out of

season jaunts, when they know the area will be less crowded and kids

will be at school again.

[Ejc]

You say you don't have children - so I'm just wondering - are these two small people sitting at the table eating and apart from being somewhat noisy - behaving well, eating their food up and not making too much mess? Have your other guests complained - or directed some of "those looks" towards the parents?

I actually like to see families out together and children sittng at the table with their parents - and unless they're are creating a nuisance - you may just be over sensitive. As a Mum of 3 boys - we enjoyed eating out en famille and discussing the day - and always looked for places that were child friendly.

 

I don't think anyone should have to put up with bad behaviour - children running around, screaming, messing about with their food or anything like that - but some noise from even the best behaved kids is just par for the course.

 

 

 

[opas]

[quote user="Ty Korrigan"]I would keep a known and registered pedophile chained up in the yard...
 That should keep parents way...

Bet Quillan wipes this one....
 


[/quote]

Depends on the Author!

 

As to Quillan boiling them in oil, he doesn`t, he drowns them in ice cold coke[:-))]

[hoverfrog]

as has been suggested, a piece of paper and a crayon - or a printout / photocopy to colour in. This is what places in the UK aimed at children (eg pizzahouse) do, and it works!

When holidaying in France as an extended family (approx 15 of us) my father used to keep the grandchildren quiet by seeing who could be quietest the longest, or who could refrain from smiling the longest (has the same effect as they can't open their mouths without giggling!).

'Normal' good spirits is usually found to be entertaining by other diners, as long as there is a limit on volume :)

The french are more used to dining with children as it is the norm - my (french) mother always said that the English couldn't wait to get rid of their children and go out without them!

[Coco]

Interesting range of views, mainly divided into two camps, as one would expect, those that have kids and those that don't.  I fall into the latter and find I have a very short fuse with them when they are involved in joining in with the adults.  I  also find that the parents seem to have the same level of toleration of noise whatever the situation.  For example, when the kids are in the garden I don't really care how much charging about, shouting, laughing etc that they do but the parents will often try and quieten them down, whereas I'm happy for them to use up all that excess energy outside, where they are bothering no one but the cows.  Now when they come in and go up to their room the parents seem to accept the same volume of noise and activity, which is obviously incredibly magnified in the house and I would expect them to be a little quieter. 

The odd few that have had very young children eating at the table with the adults have also not really kept the level of noise down in relation to the situation.  If everyone at the table has kids I just tolerate it (even if it is driving me insane) but if there are any couples without kids present I really do have to use my best and fiercest "looks".

I know that some people have said that it is nice to see families eating together or that they aren't prepared to cook two separate meals but I find that it is the best solution for the under 10s.  I always offer burger/chicken and chips followed by ice cream, about an hour earlier than the adults dinner and without fail, every mum has been delighted with the opportunity to get the kids fed and off to bed so that she can sit and relax and enjoy a "grown up moment" and feel that she too is on holiday!  Besides, who can blame young kids for getting restless and hence noisy, when they are having to sit through a 4 course meal, served at French pace?

And as for family suites.  Well I have to say I'm with Miki all the way.  When we first started we didn't consciously think "no kids" we just didn't even think about them at all.  Until July that is, when every request for accommodation was for families.  So we quickly went out and bought a camp bed to put in one of our rooms if needed.  Last year my husband built a room in the attic above our largest room and turned it into a suite.  It has been booked out at every school holiday period (and I wish I had a second).  In terms of nights booked so far this year, we are quite a few down on last year - but in terms of income, we're steaming ahead!  And that's the bottom line isn't it?  We're running a business, not a  charity for old codgers (or young ones) who want child-free holidays.

Also the added bonus we have found with the suite is that we have had several groups of single sex friends travelling together, who may not have booked with us if we couldn't offer single beds and a slightly cheaper rate by having 4 people share one shower room (less cleaning too!)

[Quillan]

I take Mikis comments about suites and couples who travel together but it’s all about space and best use of it and peoples perception of sharing things like bathrooms. Some don’t mind and others won’t even consider it. Believe it or not we have been asked many times if all our rooms are really ensuite. Only once have we ever been asked if we have rooms which connected with a door but then it may be different in other parts of France.

I have to say I have not stayed in any of the hotels in Quillan but I have had a few people call looking for rooms because they didn’t like the hotel they were staying in. The highest rated hotel in Quillan is only two stars. I think they need to get out more and see other hotels and what they do. On second thoughts perhaps not as we get their custom at present.

Perhaps the thing with children goes back to previous discussions about nationality. In most cases this time of year screaming children in our local restaurants and supermarkets tend to be English. It would be wrong to say you never get French children behave badly but it’s difficult to remember the last time I saw (or heard) this happen where the child was French.

Perhaps French children are better behaved because they are taken out to eat properly (not at McDonalds etc) with their family. I have seen large French families eating out and it’s really nice to see and the children are well behaved. I have also noticed in France, well where I live anyway, that children respect adults and adults respect them. Adults also discipline children even slapping them if required and it’s not always their parent disciplining them either. I have seen a adult smack a child who was caught bullying and beating another.

I find myself agreeing with Miki again with old people in as much as they come here out of season mainly to walk etc as July and August are just too hot for them. Most of the younger couples with no kids come for the water sports activities which we have in abundance and to cycle or walk up in the mountains where it can be as low as 17 deg (yesterday) this time of year.

I think the thing is you make your B&B fit the area and amenities that you have. We are in a high sportive area so we work round and with that. We also have the Cathar Castles of course which attract another sort of person or couples but then again they come out of season because of the walking bit.

I also have to confess that we will consider children over the age of 14. That’s because the minimum age for the activities is 14 and other than those there is little for them to do here. It’s really not the sort of place to bring you children.

[Cerise]

I'm with Miki and St Amour here - we have a family suite and I wish I had another.  It is incredibly popular, especially as it can take families with 3 or 4 children if necessary.  We also seem to get an amazing number of people travelling with one or two adult children, something I did not expect.  Sharing  the bathroom does not seem to be a problem - although must say many of them are French who seem less bothered about en-suite facilities.

Back to the children - I usually feed little ones separately unless we are doing a barbecue or something informal..  We like to start our evening meals around 8.00 pm and often don't have coffee until 10.30.  I think it is unreasonable to expect small children to sit quietly throughout that time.  Lots of the mums prefer to put them to bed and to come down for a civilised meal themselves later.   Those who want to eat together tend to go out earlier to local pizzeria or something like that.

Most of the children we have are OK.  Get a few bratty ones - but then we get some bratty adults too (see above).  The perfume is still lingering a day after their departure!!

 

 

[Coco]

I think my views (from my experiences) on English children are well known.  This coming weekend we have two adults and four kids in our family suite and 1 adult and 2 kids in our other two rooms.  SIX KIDS all under 14!!!!!!  Thankfully they're all French but I must admit, I'm still dreading it.  But if they had been English it just wouldn't have been happening at all![:'(]

[Ejc]

All I can say is that I would object if I stayed anywhere that would not allow my children to share an adult meal with us - we go on holiday to spend time with our children. But then all of our boys have eaten out with us from a young age, have good table manners, eat well and are not noisy or badly behaved and are happy to chat with anyone at the table about a range of things - but then we cook together and eat together as a family everyday.

Badly behaved chldren set my teeth on edge - but it's always the parents that are at fault never the kids - and even the nicest of people can have horribly behaved children. We have very dear friends - who are in the "let them express themselves camp" and we no longer invite them over for meals because I can't stand the noise, mess and being worried the whole time that these kids will break something - so I do understand the problems. We move over permenantly in January - and have already had long chats about what to do when certain folks want to come and stay - because their children are not socialised to be able to interact with adults.

Its even more difficult when you run a business - and of course no one will ever own up to their kids being monsters. Much I hate to say it - if we went down the gite / B&B route - I would probably opt for adults only......

 

[Just Katie]

I wholeheartly agree.  I would be livid paying for a family holiday only to receive a look and a tut on every whim.  My children too were very well behaved, although quite chatty and interactive. 

However well behaved they are, children do have tantrums at a young age (it's normal) and the only option you have when this occurs is to remove them from others.  However, this does not mean the tantrum will not stop OH NO!!! THEY will stop when THEY are ready.

I really believe if you cannot cope with taking on this then simply refuse to take children

Those who book a child welcoming gite should know what they are 'letting themselves in for' and, so long as the children are not misbehaving they have not cause for complain. Toddlers speaking loudly is quite normal too. 

Finally, I n my experience, I think something happens to a child at six.  It is as if you can reason with them.  Toddlers?  Forget it!

[Lori]

I guess I am glad that Miki and Quillan are both there.  When we vacation with my daughter in tow (and perhaps one of her friends to keep her company), I would look for accommodations that welcome families.  Yes, often the noise from kids and especially the odd bad behavior can drive me through the ceiling, but it comes with the territory.

If I am lucky enough to take a weekend break with hubby and no kids, I would never book family accommodations.  I would always look for "no kids" locations.  So, I am grateful to you both.  You keep us happy at all times.

Keep up the hard work - and I know it is very hard work.  Hubby and I were just talking about that today - wondering where all you B&B owners get your energy and patience.

Thanks to you all !

 

[her of ford]

I dont know how the patrons of the b and b's take bookings but during the spring when I was looking for accomodation for the summer holidays for myself my husband and my 7 and 6 yr old boys I was impressed by the first landlady that I spoke to who 'interviewed' me; as  I,  like everyone else ,I would imagine want to know what is on offer at the accomodation ,she in turn advised me that although she offered accomodation to famillies with young children stated that for her benefit and that of other clients she expected the children to be well behaved , and advised me that should she feel they were being unruly then she would speak to us.I had no problem with this approach and after reading the many posts on this topic feel that maybe b and b's owners etc should be more honest to prospective clients about what will and will not be tolerated and how you will approach poor behaviour.If your bookings are done over the web or another means why dont you ensure you prepare a polite do's and dont's list,so everyone is in the picture before the booking is made .I think if you are in buisness you should have the courage to lay down the rules,as well as having the courage to speak out at the time when things are not as you like,after all ,yes it is a buisness , but are you in the right buisness if you can not challenge behaviour that upsets you and other guests.

[TWINKLE]

Sound advice you of ford!

Just curious - but have ever any of you B&B, Chambre d'Hote and Gite owners had to deal with rowdy grown ups?  How do you go about it - come on I want all the embarrassing details!

 

[Just Katie]

Hello Fordy,

There is a favourite food and drink thread going on and you have not posted on it.  How strange. I agree with what you said on the B&B by the way.

[Cassis]

[quote user="her of ford"]If your bookings are done over the web or another means why dont you ensure you prepare a polite do's and dont's list,so everyone is in the picture before the booking is made .I think if you are in buisness you should have the courage to lay down the rules,as well as having the courage to speak out at the time when things are not as you like,after all ,yes it is a buisness , but are you in the right buisness if you can not challenge behaviour that upsets you and other guests.[/quote]

Do you not think it might come over as a bit 'control freakish' if you have a list of rules published?  We expect guests to respect us, our property and the comfort of other guests and we don't hesitate to say if we feel that either parents or children are overstepping the mark.  Or groups of rowdy adults.

We keep a (so far small) blacklist of people we will not have back again.

The only published rule we have is a note on our tariff notice in each room asking for rooms to be vacated by 11.00am on the day of departure.  One couple made a point of hanging about in their room until shortly after 11.00am then looking pointedly at their watches as they stood at the front door.  This was the same couple who, when they arrived at 11.30am the previous day, expected their room to be ready for them.

[Miki]

[quote] I take Mikis comments about suites and couples who travel together but

it’s all about space and best use of it and peoples perception of

sharing things like bathrooms.[/quote]

You miss the reason for a suite. It is not intended for strangers to

share a bathroom. The question of whether people will share bathrooms

does not therefore enter the equation. A suite is to be able to offer

families, friends and groups etc, a choice of accommodation, less

expensive than having to have double rooms. We are all fully aware that

most people want ensuite, so if it low season, we have just one couple

wanting a room for a few days, then they talke one of the rooms from

the suite, we close off the other room (inside and opposite the double

or triple bedroom in the private hallway) and they then have the bathroom all to themselves. The versatilty is blinding, is it not !

Sure if space is at a premium, then suites may well be out and one just has to as best one can with the room available..

As far as a niche market for places without kids, they really have been

around for a long time. There is another way, simply price kids out of

it !

[quote] I had no problem with this approach and

after reading the many posts on this topic feel that maybe b and b's

owners etc should be more honest to prospective clients about what will

and will not be tolerated and how you will approach poor behaviour.If

your bookings are done over the web or another means why dont you

ensure you prepare a polite do's and dont's list,so everyone is in the

picture before the booking is made [/quote]

Sorry but that is not even a possibility. I would take offence if I was

a parent and read anything like that, either on the net,  on a

booking form, or by being told when booking. It is the parents

responsibility to ensure their children do not run amok or annoy

guests. It is not our job to tell the kids in advance. We, if it ever happens,

which is not that often, tell the parents and or have a quiet word with

the kids to explain the problem.

Courage to lay down the rules......more like, so you want to

lose business, we can always tell them on the internet, that the bogey

man will rough the kids up if they so much as cough........Sorry, again

! But most of us know our business and offer what you have said, is

simply not a player.

[Quillan]

Sorry Miki I didn't explain myself properly. I know people do travel together like perhaps two married brothers with their wives, two good long standing friends etc, we have had these type stay as well. What I was trying to say is that sometimes, not every time, a couple that know each other really well don't want to share a bathroom. I have to say that in my and my wifes case we would not entertain stopping in a place that did not have ensuite regardless of if we were traveling with friends or family but then thats us but I don't think we are alone. On the other hand there are many who have absolutly no problem. As I said before, horses for courses.

[Quillan]

[quote user="TWINKLE"]

Sound advice you of ford!

Just curious - but have ever any of you B&B, Chambre d'Hote and Gite owners had to deal with rowdy grown ups?  How do you go about it - come on I want all the embarrassing details!

[/quote]

Simple really, if they upset other guests, me or the wife I throw them out. OK it has to be extremely rude and nasty and I have only done it once. It was an American who thought only Fox News was completely unbiased and always told the truth. He also forgave our French and Belgian guests (made a big speach at the dinner table) for surrendering to the Nazi's without much of a fight and dragging American in to the second word war (no I am not joking). That was the start, it got a lot worse, he booked for two weeks stayed for three nights and he didn't get his money back either.

The last time we ever took small children I guess you could say we threw them out but it was more of a gentle helping hand to the gate. As I said there is nothing for kids below 14 to do in our area. These kids were 8 and 12 and were really bored, it was the wrong sort of holiday for them. We did a deal with a holiday camp down on the cost for a three bed caravan on a site with childrens entertainment, baby sitters, pool and all the normal kids stuff. It was the same price as a week in our place so it cost them and us nothing. We told the guests we though this would be more suited for them. They went and later on when they got back home we had a nice letter saying they really appreciated what we did for them and their second week was fantastic.

[Miki]

Last try...................And I shall simply call it the best of both worlds.

I am pretty sure, most if not all, B&B owners know that double

rooms of course should be ensuite to cover the majority of folks that

do not want to share.

BUT in our situation, yes, you understand that some will not worry abut

sharing but tell us agin what we already know about peoples habits of

wanting their own bathroom...So, when that happens with us and we think

we will let the suite just to a couple (not a family, as it might be

out of school time etc etc) we simply lock the door of the other

bedroom et voila, a double room with private bathroom and all inside

it's own private domain with the same private door used by either the

suite or double room and lockable (inside or

outside).........................and still ready at anytime to turn

back to a family suite with private bathroom. Versatility itself

....................I hope that stops any confusion on the subject now ?

[Owens88]

Re: OP Children

There are times when even parents want to be away from children. e.g. the rise of play barn pubs in Britain has been a godsend to us parents, but I am always amazed at people who eat at them without children in tow. I wouldn't.

Surely you can establish house styles - e.g. a quiet relaxing place, a family friendly place (which doesn't condone extremes),  rugrat-free zone, etc.

 

I am currently trying to book a campsite for me and the kids (13/15) where they can surf. Some sites say no under 16's, one said no under 30's , some no single-sex groups, and one showed photos that made me feel young ! Each to their own and variety is good for a market.

Regards

 

John

[Miki]

[quote]Surely you can establish house styles - e.g. a quiet relaxing

place, a family friendly place (which doesn't condone extremes), 

rugrat-free zone, etc.[/quote]

 No problems for anyone to do that, just as long as the market you aim yourself at is in ample supply.

For instance, advertising for one armed pole vaulters, over 45's

only. There might well be a slight problem in ones earnings.....

[Cassis]

There's a thought.  I wonder how Jude'll take to my latest wizzo marketing strategy of targetting only gorgeous girls with a penchant for middle-aged men?

[Owens88]

No problems for anyone to do that, just as long as the market you aim yourself at is in ample supply.

For instance, advertising for one armed pole vaulters, over 45's only. There might well be a slight problem in ones earnings.....

I agree wholeheartedly, but if you don't do something then don't gripe if the customers are outside your expectations.

 

[Cassis]

Nobody's griping.  Here's another way to deal with guests who get out of order.

[IMG]http://i68.photobucket.com/albums/i26/cassiscassis/childcage.jpg[/IMG]