What would you have done ?

[Rosebud]

I realise it's difficult to get your opinions accross on a forum, as things can be misenterpreted very easily, so I apologise if anybody thinks I was being rude to Ali, or in any way condoning the woman who let her child cry and spoil the enjoyment of others, as I certainly wasn't.  As I said, I would be MORTIFIED if I thought my children were upsetting people.  I would remove them from the situation rather than let that happen.

I am certainly not a member of the 'children can do no wrong and must be allowed to fully express themselves' brigade, what utter twaddle that is!

I absolutely resent being tarred with that brush though because

a) I am a parent

b) I am 'modern'

It's always been hard raising kids.  It's no easier now than it was years ago.  I resent the implication that 'modern' parents don't discipline their kids!!!!  Where does that idea come from?  Just because a few people let the side down.  There have always been bad parents and there have alway been bad kids!  I seem to spend my whole life disciplining mine!!  Bless them, I'm lucky they are (mostly) extremely well behaved (in public at least!)

I'll shut up now!  I'm probably just being stressed and hormonal anyway.........two toddlers and number three on the way....would drive anybody mental!

[:)]

 

[Pip]

As a 'modern' parent Rosebud you are doing great. Otherwise you wouldn't have cared enough to respond on this thread.  Congratulations on your new addition to the family ![:D]

[Viv]

Old people in packs think they have right to be rude by virtue of their age.

My PIL ( who are lovely) have something on  a bit of paper  (they show us every visit [:$]) that makes them chuckle about what old people can do.

Its not that funny but neither is Des O Connor and they like him too [8-)]

[Russethouse]

I certainly was not without sympathy for the mother as my son was a nightmare at that age,and then some....... however we did go prepared - ie his cuddly blanket, small toy, a drink etc. (And BTW I am proud because today is the day he finishes his education - for good ! Yippee !) But I had the feeling that the mother yesterday really didn't see anything wrong. She certainly showed no outward sign of batting an eyelid at the hand clapping.

The other little boy was fine, but he was a little older, perhaps 3yrs old and his mother had something to occupy him with.

I think the older ladies were rude, but I think they were exasperated. By the time three of them had wine and coffee I should think their bill was around £85 (we didn't have wine as we were driving, and had coffee at my mothers home 5 minutes away) Thats a lot to spend just to have the occasion spoiled.

To be honest I sat there having a rush of sympathy for all those B&B owners who do not take children.

[ali-cat]

I've just got back in from doing the shopping & didn't realise the trouble I had started - I'm very sorry Rosebud, that you thought I was being rude & tarring all parents, with the same brush.  I wasn't trying to.   I know I don't have kids, but my sister & most of my friends do & I know that most of them feel the same way, I do.    

I said earlier that I totally understand a child crying or being upset - it's the parents who don't care what their kids get up to, that drives me mad.  Even my sister tells me about some of her friends kids who speak to their parents, in a way, that if we had done it - well, lets just say, we wouldn't have been able to sit down for a week.  [:$]

I have nothing against modern parents.  Infact, excactly the opposite - but unfortunately the kids that stick in your memory, tend to be the ones that are constantly misbehaving or just being downright rude.  The well mannered & polite ones don't get noticed, for the very reason that they are well behaved. 

I would bet my last pound that you are a brilliant mum & your kids are well brought up - it's very obvious by your posts.  I just wish there were more like you & less of these, as you said, "my child can do no wrong" ones.  [:)]

 

[powerdesal]

Rosebud,

My comments were not aimed at you, my apologies if that was the inadvertent impression. They were rather a comment on the present social impression that is prevalent (IMHO) in the UK today.

I do not consider myself to be a member of the 'old people' brigade yet, (perhaps I should), being under 60 I think I am reasonably 'in touch' with life. I know the problems of raising children, they are blazed forever in my mind, including fractious, bolshie, screaming tantrum type situations. There do, however, seem to be more parents these days who, as you say, 'let the side down'. Agreed there have always been bad Parents and equally bad children but I am certainly not alone in believing that it is more prevalent now than in the past. Perhaps its just the way society is changing and is all part of the great tapestry of life, I can't say. The older ladies who slow handclapped were, in my opinion, guilty of bad manners and should have known better, given their apparent age.

Once again, my apologies if you had the impression of being a 'target'

Regards

[Miki]

Could someone take this thread off topic and then it can be locked and deleted.

Jeepers, this kind of thing happens thousands of times a day here, most

of the time an almighty swipe at the kid works wonders (come in the PC

lot to say that's not right, thus un-integrating (new word ?)

themselves from the reality of French Life but hey, there you

go !) Anyone who never had a child throw tantrums, I take my hat off to

you, bottle how you managed it and sell it the millions of us mere

mortals who were often challenged by our offspring !

But I also will say this, if Tina had heard slow handclapping (

regardless of why the child was misbehaving) from old f**ts, I am

pretty sure it would have been the last time the old bats would have

ever done so ! They had their chance to say something to allay the

situation while the Mother was eating. As for the slow handclapping, no

doubt to encourage others to side with them, it was pure malice and

typical of the some of the nasty, grumpy old pensionable PC brigade.

Bet they had the blue

rinses done especially for the meal out !

No soccer today, cheesed off so joined the old fogey thread !!

Hold on, this post is kind of like that.....delete away then...................

[Rosebud]

Ali, Pip and Steve

Thanks for your comments. 

Sorry I took it personally, I blame the hormones you know!  I know you weren't saying all  modern parents are rubbish....[:$]

It was mentioned earlier that it's always the not-so-good parents who get noticed, and those with good kids are just taken for granted.  I have to admit I NEVER appreciated the hard work of my parents until I had kids of my own!  I guess that's why I get frustrated now, because I know what my attitude used to be...

I think the restuarant scenario Russethouse describes sounds dreadful, and I have sympathy for all who were there (not the least the poor kid), but I certainly feel those elderly ladies were out of order for behaving like that.

Anyway, that's enough from me, I'm off to put my feet up and enjoy the peace now the kids are safely tucked up for the night.......

Rosie

[kiss]

 

PS.  Isn't it tough living in such a PC world?  I have been really tempted to give my kids a smack at times, but these days you can get accused of abuse if you do.....I guess that's another topic though,  but not one for tonight!

[ali-cat]

My sister would have sometimes given her son, Matthew, a gentle (& I mean gentle) tap on the butt, if he was really bad. 

They were in M&S one day - he was about 4, at the time - & started playing up.  Joanne looked at him & told him to stop - at which stage he turned round & yelled "Mummy, please don't beat me, again!!"

Talk about wanting the floor to open up & swallow you!!  Joanne expected social service staff to appear from behing every clothes rail, for the rest of the day!! [:-))]

[Debra]

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