Jump to content

Death.... then integration


Nicole
 Share

Recommended Posts

It can be helpful, but not totally accurate.. For example here in  Deux Sèvres, it's 3 kisses, unless you re in a hurry or there are too many people to kiss.. In this case, yes, it 's 1 ... 

I know, it's more than confusing............

And in dpt 35 , it's 4 kisses, for sure .

But this map may give you all a hint about the general tendancy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[quote user="Frenchie"]

It can be helpful, but not totally accurate.. For example here in  Deux Sèvres, it's 3 kisses, unless you re in a hurry or there are too many people to kiss.. In this case, yes, it 's 1 ... 

I know, it's more than confusing............

And in dpt 35 , it's 4 kisses, for sure .

But this map may give you all a hint about the general tendancy.

[/quote]

 

Usually 4 kisses in Charente-Maritime (17) unless you are in a hurry or there are too many people to kiss, as Frenchie said.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 3 weeks later...
Nice map and accurate (3) for l'Aveyron (at least our bit).

One additional point (Frenchie, is this common throughout France?) is that we do not share bises  (nor do the others, aside from family) with the senior lady of the village.

Also here, on first acquaintance, it may or may not be bises.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't know about strict but yes, she is most highly respected. She and her husband (both in their 70s) also work extremely hard. He recently dug a 1m+ deep trench from the wall of their house to the road, in order to connect up to the new sewage system being installed (they didn't want to/couldn't afford to waste money paying the contractors) and a few weeks ago I saw her up a ladder, helping to construct the walls of their new bergerie ....

Meanwhile I struggle to put together the wooden composter I bought my wife for her birthday (the one before last - birthday, not wife).

Link to comment
Share on other sites

[quote user="chessfou"]...Meanwhile I struggle to put together the wooden composter I bought my wife for her birthday....
[/quote]

My glasses need cleaning!  I misread "composter" as "computer" - and it conjured up a wonderful vision !

Angela

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...
[quote user="Acoustic"]

We initially found moving to France hard after living in Andalucia for 6 years for this very reason.  There the level of familiarity is much more noticeable, although you would still definitely need to know the appropriateness of certain actions.  Moving to "tu" is quite rapid, much more so than in other parts of Spain, but you have to gauge the move pretty shrewdly!  And two kisses on the cheek is so common that I still have to think twice here as it is very usual on first introduction in Spain on social occasions, almost like the British handshake. But even there I would find it amazing in a commercial situation - the bank teller might be calling you "tu" after a few visits unless you make a point of using "usted" (vous) - sometimes used as a "distancer" in various circumstances (a whole other story) - but any kisses would be most unlikely!

All in all I find it easier in France now, "vous" almost invariably (we've never yet got to know anyone where "tu" might be used) and, so far, no kisses!

[/quote]

I've been kissed upon introduction in social situations in France (was I ever surprised), but I can't imagine anyone at Credit Ag doing so (although they have been very helpful and patient with me when I've had problems).

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I wrote earlier in this thread that I could imagine Nathalie at our Credit Agricole branch kissing someone. And lo and behold last week I saw her kiss the female friend of ours that I mentioned. Once on each side . But she only shook Steve's hand.  (Not Steve powerdesal.)
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi, I wonder if someone can advise me as I am confused about tu and vous! I hope that it's ok to post this here!

We have recently become aquaintances / friends with some parents of a school friend of my daughters.  These parents and my husband all call eachother tu but I continue to call them vous.  I know that they are quite desperate to become good friends with us (the mother is a Parisien and has not found the village very welcoming!).

Normally, as I have done with other people in the village, I would wait for them to invite me to call them tu.  The problem arises because my (french) husband has told me that he believes that they are using vous with me because they know I am a doctor and want to show respect. He tells me that I should invite them to use tu! 

I am not sure that my husband is right with this assumption (despite being french, he is not always right about french etiquette!!) but as I said, I do know that they want to be friends with us! 

Anyone have any advice?  If I am to suggest tu, how do I do it?

TIA

El

P.S. I also forgot to kiss her this morning on the school run - I was too busy gabbling on about our (youngest) children's first day at school (OOPS)! 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 Hello, and welcome to the forum!

Being French , I can give you my feeling about that, but some posters might have a different one , of course.

I assume your husband is right, because something strange and unpleasant often happens to me. When I am introduced to people about my age in a party, or wherever, thay use tu, and the conversation is fine, until they ask me what I do, and when I say that I'm a teacher, they start using " vous" again !! [:-))]

So , if you want to invite them to say " tu " to you ( = tutoyer) , you can simply say

" On pourrait se  tutoyer , non ? "

 Or " On peut se dire tu , n 'est ce pas ?"

Hope this helps..

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Knowing when, who and how many kisses are correct does seem to be quite a problem...[:)]

However, and I'm sure that Powerdesal will back me up in this, in the Middle East (yep I just left there) it's a little more unusual.

The men kiss each other on the cheeks (or if you're related maybe on the forehead or nose), believe me as a fully red-blooded western male it does take a little getting used to, especially when it's your very influential employer that's instigating the move...[kiss]

And then there's what you can do with the ladies, or rather what you can't do with them, some even won't let you shake hands, you tend not, as a male, to offer a hand leaving it to the lady to make the first hand-shake move.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have never got involved with the men kissing men bit - Its just their culture but it seems very odd to us, as does the men walking around holding hands - sign of close friendship.

As far as local ladies go, no physical contact at all, none, zilch, nada, dont even think about it.

Some even wear full arm length gloves when driving, presumably because a man might have touched the steering wheel - strange.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...

Please sign in to comment

You will be able to leave a comment after signing in



Sign In Now
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...