Is there life in Normandy??

[Foxy]

I expect  this question has probably come up on the forum many times in the past, but I will ask it again anyway.

My wife and I (fairly active mid-sixties retirees) have been thinking about relocating to France for quite a while, but would rent for , perhaps, six months, before committing to buy a house. We have finally narrowed down our favourite areas to Manche or Calvados, not too far from the coast, if possible.

Last year we rented for a month near to La Haye du Puits, and very much liked the feel of that area. I speak enough French to get around but my wife would be a complete beginner. We are starting to learn from courses on the Internet, and would enrol for classes when we get to France.

My real question is:- How difficult is it initially to involve yourself in a local community, without speaking fluent French? Obviously we would like to meet other ex-pats, but would really want to get to know as many local French people as possible. We realise that the social scene in small French towns or villages is not the same as England (No Pub), and when you drive through small towns etc, you hardly ever see any signs of life. Is there anybody there?

We would really love to hear from others on the forum about their experiences in trying to integrate and making a go of living in France.

 

[tinabee]

If you make the effort to speak French, people do appreciate it and you will improve the more you try. There is lots to do - I suppose it just depends what you are interested in. Here is a list of the associations in our local town:

http://www.vire.com/vie_en_ville/asso/

There is even one specifically for newcomers to the town.

In the villages, the locals may take some time to get to know and you will probably always be classed as outsiders. This applies to anyone whose grandparents were not born in the village, including the French. Our village has an annual meeting hosted by the Maire which, if you find something similar, is a great place to start.

A lot of the get-togethers may seem a bit old-fashioned or parochial in comparison with the UK, but they are normally very friendly and convivial. Our last local event was the election of the May Queen followed by aperitifs :o)

 

[Framboise]

We moved out in Feb this year to Normandy.   Life here does not revolve around pubs or shopping, rather its a family affair whereby people mix in their own social circles instead of sitting in a pub for an evening.    It is different to what we Brits are used to but that why we like it!

Our local noticeboard by the church has all sorts of social activities open to everyone on it.   Casserole Evenings, dance classes, get togethers etc, plus there is also a whole list of things connected to the church or the local schools to get involved in if you wish.   A trip to a bigger town near by offers an even greater range of social activities - and bars if thats what you want.

Our French is not good, yet by and large we have been welcomed to this quiet backwater by lovely people who help us whenever they can when we communicate with lots of hand signals and gramatically ghastly French.   Don't let lack of language ability put you off -  the effort is more appreciated than if you stand there bellowing in English at them expecting to be understood.

By the way, the towns and villages you pass are not deserted.  Just roll up there on market day or on a festival and the place will be thronging with life, its just that for most folk life revolves around home and family and they have no need to be out in bars etc.     The French Way is different to what we were used to in England and thats how it should remain.  [:D]

[Kitty]

[quote user="Foxy"] How difficult is it initially to involve yourself in a local community, without speaking fluent French? ... we would ... really want to get to know as many local French people as possible. [/quote]

There are a number of French people who can speak English but not a huge number, bearing in mind for long conversations, their (or your) language skills have to be pretty good.  So I think that you are limited if you do not speak French.  Language lessons will improve your proficiency but will not allow you to have lengthy conversations until you have been here for some time.  The chattier the French person, the easier it is to speak because you always understand more than you can speak.

I have met a number of French people by going to vide greniers (car boot sales) and chatting to people because they are next to their stalls all day and have time to speak.

[Foxy]

Many thanks to TinaB, Framboise and Cathy for your replies. I havn't been able to thank you all up to now, as we have been over to Normandy again for a few days. Very helpful thoughts and advice. Much appreciated.  Our house is up for sale  and we are getting quite a bit of interest!! 

Best wishes to you all.

Foxy

[cassis]

[quote user="Foxy"]

I speak enough French to get around but my wife would be a complete beginner. We are starting to learn from courses on the Internet, and would enrol for classes when we get to France.

[/quote]

If you're planning to learn the lingo at classes in France, make sure there are French classes for Brits available near where you move to - these are not that common, unless you're moving to an area with a lot of Brits.

[Junlesley]

Hi Foxy,

We live near La Haye du Puits and its a lovely area to live in, nice friendly French and English people to meet, if you contact Jill Cousin at Gimazane Immobilier in La Haye du Puits e.mail [email protected] she will give you lots of info on the area and tell you what activities are available ( if you are interested in painting her Husband Joe runs painting classes) and there are several French classes in and around the area, I couldn't wish to live anywhere else but here but perhaps I'm biased.

Please feel free to contact me direct if you have any other questions.

[Foxy]

Hi June,

Sorry I haven't answered your message before, but I have been off-line for about 3 weeks. Very nice to hear that you love living near La Haye du Puits and that the local French and English are  friendly and welcoming.   We have now sold our house  in Essex, and completion is fixed for 24th October.  We are going to rent again in Vesly (near La Haye) for a   short while and hope to meet people while we are in Normandy. I will definitely contact Jill Cousin during our stay.

Changeing the subject!!  I recently heard that some old friends of ours, who moved to Nord Pas de Calais some years ago, were not allowed to put their house up for sale for the price they wanted, because the Mayor refused them permission.  They had spent quite a lot on the property over the years,and considered that they were asking a fair price.

I have not heard anything like this before now.  Surely the Mayor doesn't have any control over property prices in his town or village ? Have you heard anything like this while you have been in France?

Looking forward to hearing from you.

Best wishes,

Foxy

 

[Junlesley]

Hi Foxy,

Not heard anything like that before but maybe jill may have the answer.

Yes I know Vesley its a nice little place, I'm sure we'll meet up when you are over here, we dont tend to live in each others pockets but we do meet up and have get togethers ocasionally, normally its BBQ's or just a good old chinwag!

[Cerise]

Is your wife the sort of lady to whom friendships are important.  If so, I wouldn't recommend rural France.  There is difference between 'friendly' and 'friends'.   The local people here are perfectly friendly but realistically I have nothing in common with most of them.  Friendships seem to take years to develop and socialising is mostly in couples in the forms of aperos etc.  Talking about the weather and local gossip can lose its charm after a while.

I have noticed that very, very few English people have any real French friends.  Let's be honest an evening where you can hardly speak to other people may be entertaining at first but soon becomes hard work.  In rural areas ladies are generally expected to be housewives, mothers and grandmothers first and their own social life comes a long way down the scale of importance.  Family life is sacred.  Most retired ex-pats do seem to move only in a circle of ex-pats.

If you have a hobby which you love and you move somewhere where there is an association for that hobby it may be easier.  Thoses who settle best are those who like each others company best and don't seek too much outside life to keep them cheery.

 

PS just noticed that this post is quite old and you are now thinking of renting.  Very sensible.

 

 

[Foxy]

Hi June,

My wife, Valerie, and our Golden retriever are now staying in a lovely gite in Vesly. We are here for another month,  and wondered if you would like to meet up for a drink and a chat.  We have already been in to see Jill Cousin at Gimazane (What a lovely woman) and driven round some of the houses she got out for us.

Let me know if you would like to meet (No pressure )

Best wishes,

Foxy

 

[Junlesley]

Hi Foxy,

Would love to meet up for a drink, unfortunately I wont be home until the 30th of this month, I'm only home tonight because I found a little kitten near where I was pet-sitting and needed to bring it home, Leighton my husband has gone off pet-sitting for the night while I sort this little one out.

If you e-mail me we can arrange something before you go back.

PS Sorry if I sometimes take ages to reply, its the nature of my job that takes me away for weeks at a time.

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[Foxy]

Hi June,

Lovely to hear from you.

Unfortunately, since we sold our house in UK, our email situation has been all over the place. My old email address is registered with the forum, and as I am no longer with that provider (greenbee), therefore I can't send out answers to your replies on the forum.

Perhaps I will ask Jill Cousin if she can give me your email address or phone number, so that we can get in touch directly.

Bye for now,

Best wishes,

Foxy

[Junlesley]

Hi Foxy,

Our telephone number is xxxxxxxxxx Leighton is at home but I'm away pet-sitting, however I have got use of a computer at this clients house which is quite good for keeping intouch with things.

As I said in my last posting it will be very nice to meet up for that drink and a good old natter with you and your wife, Jill did tell me that you had been in to see her, and yes she is a lovely person.

See you after the 30th.

June

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[Clair]

Foxy and Junlesley

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[dragonrouge]

Hi Foxy see that you are staying in a gite in Normandie and being very sensible in 'looking around' and getting a feel of Normandie.

We bought our first house as a maison secondaire in Normandie on a bright August day in 2001.  wonderful just wonderful but on top of the highest point in Normandie and 3km from the nearest village which was Percy.  My french is ok and much better now but my wife's French is still a bit limited but improving.

In 2005 we took early retirement then moved to France to our house.  In 2007 we moved further south to the Vendee and village life for we believed we needed to integrate and not have to drive everywhere to get basic provisions.

Vendee brings noted benefits but I miss in part Normandie.  But as in everything location location location is everything and please believe me that unless you really are some tough cookies total isolation is very difficult especially in the darkest times of the year in Normandie.  It did not help much that we were hit three times by lightning and of course most services be they electricity or FT come overhead in Normandie.

Then you have to take care to make sure that if you do buy then beware of the THT pylons.

I miss the open spaces of Normandie and village life is different but everyday you have to speak French you meet obviously more people you develop relationships you notice things and there is here compared to say Percy or Villedieu much more to do but we do not have the countryside that Normandie does.

During winter in Normandie I did get a bit depressed and when market day came on Tuesday in Villedieu you could hear the English voices and it was a meeting day and point for both French and English and the French really looked for ward to it and of course the following Tuesday!

I suppose I have in reality said nothing save to say that we liked Normandie and our time there but in the end isolation drove us almost mad and the threat of THT was altogether not a helpful process as well.

You will enjoy Normandie but really do take your time over the buying process for it does tend to be expensive with fees and the like and you must get it right or at least right for you and no one else.

Finally I am able to confirm that both here in the Vendee and say at La Colombe near to Villedieu some English friends of ours bought some land on lottisements and had a house built to their own specification one of the benefits being that but of course as they get older a newer house would not necessarily need as much mtce and when ladders become difficult!  Again there is no such thing on these developments as fosse septiques which of course is again an altogether differing problem!