Furry Knickers Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 I have discovered today from Mrs Gupta, That a goat dies somewhere in the world every 7 minutes. I felt so sad after hearing this, that I am trying to write this post as quick as possible to prevent a goat dying needlessly while I type. They have a saying in Kildare "If me goat dies, I shall rob another one" If this is true then surely it is a mathmatical certainty that all the goats in Kildare are stolen, because the person that had his goat stolen from the lad that had his goat die, will then go and rob a goat from someone else, and it just becomes a placebo effect. I feel so strongly about it that I have written to the Pope, I shall also be writing a song based on these real life events that have scarred Kildare forever. As it has taken me more than 7 minutes to write this, another poor goat has sadly passed away somewhere in this old wild world. I am off to church to light candles for all of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tresco Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 That Mrs Gupta again. I can't help but feel she knows exactly which buttons to press where you're concerned, Mr Nix. On the off chance that she isn't fibbing, why not introduce the Goat Thieves of Kildare to the French expression 'Chacun a son Goat', rather than bothering the Pope with what is surely an ecumenical matter, anyway.[:)] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 [quote user="FurryKnickers "]I have written to the Pope[/quote]Has his Holiness replied? Do any Cardinals have views on this subject? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Framboise Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Don't mention this to the Archbishop of Canterbury whatever you do [:D] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frederick Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Why ? because he has been a bit of a "Silly Billy " ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 [quote user="Frederick"]Why ? because he has been a bit of a "Silly Billy " ?[/quote][:D] [:D] Are you KIDding? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine Animal Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 A word of caution to all, that Mrs. Gupta is just playing the giddy goat again which is not surprising with all her fake cats, she's probably just a big fake herself.Are you sure they're not just fainting ?http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=we9_CdNPuJg&feature=related Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Will Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 [quote user="FurryKnickers "]I feel so strongly about it that I have written to the Pope... ,[/quote]As His Holiness sends out so many bulls himself, he might appreciate receiving a goat in return. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 The You Tube clip said that there were 400 million goats in the world. That doesn't seem many. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Furry Knickers Posted February 11, 2008 Author Share Posted February 11, 2008 [quote user="Cathy"]The You Tube clip said that there were 400 million goats in the world. That doesn't seem many.[/quote] That is because one dies every 7 minutes[:(] I shall post the reply I get from the Pope as soon as I receive it. Them fainting goats are amazing! I do be so relieved to see them get back up again. Could a worldwide shortage of goats be just round the corner? I just don't know! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnOther Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 The A of C is a silly old goat himself don't you think ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Furry Knickers Posted February 11, 2008 Author Share Posted February 11, 2008 [quote user="Christine Animal"]A word of caution to all, that Mrs. Gupta is just playing the giddy goat again which is not surprising with all her fake cats, she's probably just a big fake herself[/quote] Dearest Mrs Animal, I can assure you that Mrs Gupta is not acting the goat on this occasion. I know she has a bit of a reputation that goes back to her time on the market stall in Dublin, when she said to a local lad that the fake cats she sold were actual real live cats that were in a catatonic trance. "so them are real cats" said the lad, "indeed they are" said Mrs Gupta. "are ya sure a cat is a tonic now" said the lad, "they are indeed" said Mrs Gupta. The lad bought 3 of the cats and went off happy as Larry "don't drink them all at once" shouted Mrs Gupta to the lad. Of course she was later arrested and took off in a black maria by the Garda and charged with attempted inducement of obtaining money by feline impersonation with intent to deceive. She has learned her lesson and now is proud to sell her false cats with a lifetime warranty proclaiming that if you buy one of her synthtetic cats, you get your money back if it dies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Will Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Furry, we have one of Mrs Gupta's fake cats in France, it was a present from a French lady who mistakenly thought we would like the thing. The big problem is that when any visitors go upstairs they see this erstatz cat lying in its box, and they tell us they think one of our real cats has died, which causes great distress in the house. Do you think she would give us a refund? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 And I was reading the Telegraph Online today that there are 2 million breeding pairs King Penguins, so I presume that means that there are 4 million of them? Unless any of them are homosexual and then, I suppose, they woudn't be breeding pairs so we'll ignore them. It also says that for every 0.26 degrees C increase in sea surface warming, 9% will die.So if the temperature goes up by 1 degree, about 3945 of them will die every day - that's nearly 3 every minute, Furry. Don't you think that you should be telling Benedict XVI about this?I mean, with all the maths needed for this post, it took me about 20 mins and so 60 have died while I was typing. I know that's assuming that the sea has gone up by 1 degree. Well, today the sea probably went up by quite a bit, especially as Chris Head told the Forum that he would be bathing in the Mediterrean. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
woolybananasbrother Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 But do they breed with their cousins? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Wooly said: But do they breed with their cousins?Are we talking penguins or goats, Wooly? I know a thing or two about penguins and so could let you have some more information, if you wanted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 Just for you, Wooly, my research on penguins. Apologies, Furry, we can go back to goats later.Cousin King Penguins are permitted to marry each other.Fact: All seven penguins islands in the South Atlantic allow it, provided they give the King of King Penguins (for it is he) a basket of 75 fishFact: In the last quarter of 2007, 50,000 cousin penguins married.Fact: Polar bears are not allowed to marry cousins because the North Pole and the South Pole have different jurisdictions.Fact: Estimates show that 20 percent of all penguins are first cousins.Fact: Albert Einstein married his first cousin but he wasn’t a penguin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Furry Knickers Posted February 11, 2008 Author Share Posted February 11, 2008 [quote user="Will"] Furry, we have one of Mrs Gupta's fake cats in France, it was a present from a French lady who mistakenly thought we would like the thing. The big problem is that when any visitors go upstairs they see this erstatz cat lying in its box, and they tell us they think one of our real cats has died, which causes great distress in the house. Do you think she would give us a refund[/quote] Dear Will, I shall put in a good word for you with Mrs Gupta, I'm sure a refund or exchange can be arranged fairly quickly providing you still have your receipt! Dear Cathy, I don't mind you highlighting the plight of any creatures, and I do love penguins and bears too. I wish I was as good at maths as you are! Me pug was crying after reading about the polar bears in your post, so I picked him up and looked into his little face to see not a tear in his eye. I thought it so strange that he could cry without shedding any tears, so I phoned Mrs Gupta to see if she could envagle me with her knowledge of this subject. She told me that dogs have no tear ducks in their eyes, but human people have got them in both eyes, which is why we can cry tears. I was delighted to find out that I have these tiny ducks in me eyes that can produce the water for the tears. Ducks do love water and I suppose it should have been very obvious that this was the answer to me question. I am now wondering why I have never seen a duck crying? Cathy, do you know why that is? and is a duck just full of water? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cerise Posted February 11, 2008 Share Posted February 11, 2008 What proof do you have of that Cathy? Did you meet Albert Einstein - where is it written that he was not a penguin? Or his cousin for that matter? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted February 12, 2008 Share Posted February 12, 2008 [quote user="Cerise"]What proof do you have of that Cathy? Did you meet Albert Einstein - where is it written that he was not a penguin? Or his cousin for that matter?[/quote]Sadly, Cerise, I don't think that a King Penguin is capable of constructing a theory of relativity. Not even an Emperor Penguin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted February 12, 2008 Share Posted February 12, 2008 Furry Knickers asked: I am now wondering why I have never seen a duck crying? Cathy, do you know why that is? and is a duck just full of water?I understand that ducks have three eyelids - see http://www.funshun.com/amazing-facts/duck-birds-facts.html So that could reduce them to tears, Furry. They also only live for 2 - 12 years and so we have another problem to tell Benedict XVI. Has he replied yet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chris Posted February 12, 2008 Share Posted February 12, 2008 This is very worrying for me as according to chinese astrology I am a goat ! I will say au revoir maintenant just in case my 7 minutes is nearly up !Chris Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted February 12, 2008 Share Posted February 12, 2008 Just as well that you're not born in the year of the penguin, Chris. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ali-cat Posted February 12, 2008 Share Posted February 12, 2008 I'm a Horse. A "Fire-horse" no less & according to Chinese tradition, that's quiet good. Not sure why ..... passionate & very bad tempered (better ask Mr. Cat about that [Www]) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Furry Knickers Posted February 12, 2008 Author Share Posted February 12, 2008 Cathy, Thank you for the amazing duck facts[:)] I think you and Mrs Animal must have been poured from the same jug. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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