Kitty Posted June 12, 2008 Share Posted June 12, 2008 You need 8 mins and you have to watch both videos in order. My children and I found these videos when surfing together on You Tube. We all burst out laughing spontaneously several times when watching the second video but you have to watch the first video to get the humour.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fox-ja7YDSw&feature=relatedhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R0UT2MpdWnc&feature=related Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine Animal Posted June 12, 2008 Share Posted June 12, 2008 And here's one for Pads. [:D]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x1sQkEfAdfY&feature=related Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted June 12, 2008 Author Share Posted June 12, 2008 Thanks for that CA.It reminds me of my first German lesson when I was taught: The rubber tree is in the office. Die Gummebaum ist im Buro. Very useful but only when explaining to Germans (in English) how useless my language lessons were.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pads Posted June 12, 2008 Share Posted June 12, 2008 [quote user="Christine Animal"]And here's one for Pads. [:D][/quote]Thanks christine [;-)]Heres one of James Blunt I like :http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thtmaZnxk_0&feature=related Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted June 12, 2008 Author Share Posted June 12, 2008 Great stuff, Pads. Smiled all the way through it and still chuckling now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Katie Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 The Eddie Izzard clip was class. He reminds me of myself in France especially when I am with non frenchspeaking friends and I want to show off a bit to impress them. I really look around for things that I am able to talk about, no matter how obscure they are. I know I make myself look like a right codge to the French (and maybe to my mates too) . Anyway, my mates all sit there with these sort of impressed expressions..........well I think that is what they are [blink]. Then along comes Twinkle and spoils it all for mehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wi8-hehfwXU Anyway, I have also been known to do this kind of thing amongst my non frenchspeaking mates..................enjoy.BTW I have also been told I resemble old Kenneth a bit [:@] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clair Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 I can just imagine you doing that!! [:P] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted June 13, 2008 Author Share Posted June 13, 2008 JK - really good clip. Brought back lots of memories. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
just john Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 You've missed a few. . .? though there are almost as many spoofs as there are of him, including a bit of french!"Je réalise" with Sinik feat, I much prefer the real thing but when you have to have a laff, here's my favourite spoof, at least the words are original, (you never had a date that you didn't inflate, lol) You're pitiful [8-|] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine Animal Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 Talking of high voices, I love, what happened to Jimmy Somerville? Even he parleyed a bit of français.Jimmy Somerville Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clair Posted June 13, 2008 Share Posted June 13, 2008 Christine!!!Quel sacrilège!!!Françoise Hardy chante Gainsbourg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted June 13, 2008 Author Share Posted June 13, 2008 Try this for size:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0hPkfBd3no Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weedon Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 Why women need cataloguesAndMorris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, 'Esther,I'd like to ride in that helicopter.' Esther always replied, 'I know Morris, but that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars' One year Esther and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said, 'Esther, I'm 85 years old. If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance.' To this, Esther replied, 'Morris that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.' The pilot overheard the couple and said, 'Folks I'll make you a deal. I'll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say a word, I won't charge you! But if you say one word, it's fifty dollars.' Morris and Esther agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of fancy maneuvers, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, but still not a word. When they landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, 'By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed!' Morris replied, 'Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Esther fell out, but, you know, fifty dollars is fifty dollars....' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine Animal Posted June 26, 2008 Share Posted June 26, 2008 Loved them both Weedon. [IMG]http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk73/AxiaCoach/DogLaughing.gif[/IMG] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weedon Posted July 4, 2008 Share Posted July 4, 2008 Spooky happenings in Wales. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
just john Posted July 4, 2008 Share Posted July 4, 2008 HOW TO MEDICATE YOUR PET : HOW TO GIVE A DOG A PILL:1. Wrap it in bacon.2. Toss it in the air.... HOW TO GIVE A CAT A PILL:1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position left hand forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As catopens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.3. Retrieve cat from bedroom and throw soggy pill away.4. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.6. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.9. Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans; drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.10. Retrieve cat from neighbour's shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard, and close door on to neck, to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus shot. Apply whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw Tee shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.12. Call fire department to retrieve the damn cat from across the road. Apologize to neighbour who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.13. Tie the little bastard's front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of filet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 pints of water down throat to wash pill down.14. Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.15. Arrange for RSPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and call local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pierre ZFP Posted July 4, 2008 Share Posted July 4, 2008 YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2008 when... 1. You accidentally enter your PIN on the microwave. 2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years. 3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three. 4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you. 5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses. 6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries. 7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen 8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't even have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it. 10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee. 11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : ) 12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing. 13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message. 14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list. 15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list. ~~~~~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~~~~~~~~ NOW U R LAUGHING at yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cooperlola Posted July 4, 2008 Share Posted July 4, 2008 NJJohn, we are rolling around laughing at this, having wormed our three cats last night, including Cooper, who weighs in at 7kilos. We bare the scars. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
just john Posted July 4, 2008 Share Posted July 4, 2008 Time for a pint! [8-|] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cooperlola Posted July 4, 2008 Share Posted July 4, 2008 Hic.[B] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cooperlola Posted July 9, 2008 Share Posted July 9, 2008 These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published! By court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place. ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active? WITNESS: No, I just lie there. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forget. ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?' ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? WITNESS: My name is Susan! _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo? WITNESS: We both do. ATTORNEY: Voodoo? WITNESS: We do. ATTORNEY: You do? WITNESS: Yes, voodoo _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he? WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? WITNESS: Are you kidding' me? _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? WITNESS: Uh.... I was getting' laid! _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: She had three children, right? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: How many were boys? WITNESS: None . ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? WITNESS: Are you shittin' me? Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney? _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? WITNESS: By death. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? WITNESS: Now whose death do you suppose terminated it? _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard. ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? WITNESS: Guess. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people? WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Would you like to rephrase that? _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to? WITNESS: Oral. _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m. ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him! _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? WITNESS: Huh....are you qualified to ask that question? _____________________________________ And the best for last: _____________________________________ ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless? WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weedon Posted July 9, 2008 Share Posted July 9, 2008 Lovely coops, I have given it the honour of forwarding it to a friend who appreciates a good laugh.[:D] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cooperlola Posted July 9, 2008 Share Posted July 9, 2008 What I admired so much about this were the people who came back with witty ripostes so quickly. They're the kind of responses that might occur to me hours afterwards, but not at the time, and certainly not in court! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Please sign in to comment
You will be able to leave a comment after signing in
Sign In Now