Théière Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 [quote user="Clarkkent"][quote user="american45"]Not, to sound rude, but most of these responses are pretty blain, not much of these responses has to do with culture differences but it's been merely relationship advice. I'll ask again, since I may of confused someone In France, is it normal for a French woman to ask a guy friend to go watch a movie, while having a boyfriend? Note: she has only known me for a little while[/quote]Young man, you and she are in America. She is not in France, so stop patronising her. She has, presumably, come to America to experience a different culture, a different approach. Do not bother with what she would experience in France - she can always go back there and resume French experiences. Do what you would normally do. Be yourself. Be American.[/quote]1. She is only interested in getting a green card2. It is the plot of "American Pie" so stay away from Mom's apple pie.3. She is a gender transexual and want's to get you on your own to break you in [:D] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chancer Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 My experience of younger French girls when they are away from France studying is that within reason they tend to go along with the customs of their peers which may not necessarily be those of the host country if they are living in a multi nationality dormitory for instance.So a young French girl in England or USA may well ask out a guy she fancies which she would not in France (although some do) but is more likely to draw the line at dressing up and comporting like the other girls in public Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Molly Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 word play : A green card in a " salle obscure " : How to get a green card in a dark room ....[:D] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
american45 Posted January 5, 2011 Author Share Posted January 5, 2011 [quote user="Molly"]I didn't think that American 45 was in America currently ...But never mind .I gave an answer , a clear answer . French women generally do not act like this . ( If they are well - bred ) .They can invite a man to see a movie , but only if they have been friends for a long time . (I insist : All depends on her age too . )You seem to be rather uncomfortable in this situation; So try to think about why ....I am sure that you will find the answer ....[/quote]Yeah, I seem uncomfortable about this because I'm asking questions about your backwards culture, yeah, your smart..... and a snob, but at least your "well-bred" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
woolybanana Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 Oi, this is getting beyond the pale! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Molly Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 American45, I didn't want to hurt you . I do not know if we can say that French Culture is a backward culture ... In New England things are not so different( I think ); Yes , you are going to say : In New England , All old oddities are esteemed... I just wanted to give you a piece of advice ...Now , as French people say ." Vous faites comme vous voulez ..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WJT Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 Perhaps this is a good example of why American45 needs advice in reading messages. [:)]No offence American45 because I think it is the same with many if not most men [Www]. But I think you misread Molly's message of which (being an American woman) took it as very kind advice from a French womans view point. Molly if I am wrong about you being French I apologise, it really is easy to misread the written word. [:D] PS There are many that may disagree with this but my opinion would be that unless we are talking about LA or perhaps New York, I would say there is less of a difference between the way an American young woman and French young woman would act in a dating situation versus those in the UK.Do please let us know what happens on your "date", it does in the end come down to the individual but I for one would be very interested what her intentions were. Good luck. [:)] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Molly Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 American45I would like to know how you managed it ...I hope you 'll tell us about the end ... or the beginning of ....the history ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clarkkent Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 [quote user="Molly"] I didn't think that American 45 was in America currently ...But never mind .I gave an answer , a clear answer . French women generally do not act like this . ( If they are well - bred ) .They can invite a man to see a movie , but only if they have been friends for a long time . (I insist : All depends on her age too . )You seem to be rather uncomfortable in this situation; So try to think about why ....I am sure that you will find the answer ....[/quote]Earlier reply:[quote]She's 21 She's in college, she's a foreign exchange student, so is her supposed bf Yes, this is taking place in America. [/quote]This is the 21st century.[Www] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
american45 Posted January 6, 2011 Author Share Posted January 6, 2011 [quote user="Molly"]American45, I didn't want to hurt you . I do not know if we can say that French Culture is a backward culture ... In New England things are not so different( I think ); Yes , you are going to say : In New England , All old oddities are esteemed... I just wanted to give you a piece of advice ...Now , as French people say ." Vous faites comme vous voulez ..." [/quote]I'm not sure how you can be so presumptuous. You think I'm uncomfortable about my situation, and now you have "hurt me".Do you guys use the word "hurt" so loosely? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YCCMB Posted January 6, 2011 Share Posted January 6, 2011 American45 You have made a fairly classic mistake in coming here to ask your question. Why?1. Because this is a forum for English people (or anglophones) living in France. As a result, the vast majority of people writing on this forum are about as French as you are.2. I would hazard a guess that also the vast majority of people on this forum, regardless of nationality, are old enough to be your parents.It's therefore unlikely, but not impossible, that there are enough people on here who can "connect" on any level with what you're asking.Get on with it. She's asked you if you want to go to a movie.You both know it's not a marriage proposal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaulT Posted January 6, 2011 Share Posted January 6, 2011 [quote user="american45"][quote user="Molly"]I didn't think that American 45 was in America currently ...But never mind .I gave an answer , a clear answer . French women generally do not act like this . ( If they are well - bred ) .They can invite a man to see a movie , but only if they have been friends for a long time . (I insist : All depends on her age too . )You seem to be rather uncomfortable in this situation; So try to think about why ....I am sure that you will find the answer ....[/quote] Yeah, I seem uncomfortable about this because I'm asking questions about your backwards culture, yeah, your smart..... and a snob, but at least your "well-bred"[/quote]An example of How to Win Friends and Influence People.I personally think you have a hell of a lot of growing up to do. you sound totally immature - perhaps Mummy and Daddy still spoon feed you - at some point you will need to stand on your own two feet and think for yourself, that is unless you are going in to Daddies business.A girl has asked you out. First question do you want to go or not. If not then politely and tactfully decline her invitation. If you do wish to go then you need to become mature and take note of signs and what she says - but do have the maturity not to do anything silly unless you are sure.So whay has she asked you out when she has a boyfirend - perhaps she is tired of him, thinks she might prefer you, you might be an easy meal ticket etc.Plus how can you judge the culture of a country. In France, as in the Uk as in the US most people are reasonably law abiding and considerate. However, some are murderers, robbers etc. I have my own set of values that might be different to others. People we think of as staright as a die suddenly get found out that they are having affairs etc.You do not need to know about the culture in France or anywhere else. You just need to go to the cinema and learn exactly what the invitation is about. No one on here can tell you of the young girls intentions - only she knows what they are.Paul Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cendrillon Posted January 6, 2011 Share Posted January 6, 2011 American 45 you have two great answers today from Betty and PaulT so why not just go on the date and see what gives. It's only an outing to see a film for goodness sake, are you a man or a mouse?[8-)] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Molly Posted January 6, 2011 Share Posted January 6, 2011 American45That's strange , in the beginning I thought that you were 45 years old . I was certainly wrong ,wasn't I?You say ' a young Franch woman ", But why not saying "A woman of my age ... I am 23 for example ..."That's true that there are lots of "seniors " on this forum . You certainly do not ignore this fact . And we can't have the same approach because of that . Do you have a FB account ? In that case , you can find good friends of your age around you who could answer to your request : French people or American people who could have been in touch with French girls ...Obviously , you seem to be very nervous about this situation . But you have to learn that sometimes in our life we do not get an answer to our questions , and if we get it , we have to understand it and to accept it. It's another step . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Théière Posted January 6, 2011 Share Posted January 6, 2011 If your that worried take a chaparone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
american45 Posted January 6, 2011 Author Share Posted January 6, 2011 [quote user="You can call me Betty"]American45 You have made a fairly classic mistake in coming here to ask your question. Why?1. Because this is a forum for English people (or anglophones) living in France. As a result, the vast majority of people writing on this forum are about as French as you are.2. I would hazard a guess that also the vast majority of people on this forum, regardless of nationality, are old enough to be your parents.It's therefore unlikely, but not impossible, that there are enough people on here who can "connect" on any level with what you're asking.Get on with it. She's asked you if you want to go to a movie.You both know it's not a marriage proposal.[/quote]But it could be a marriage proposal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
woolybanana Posted January 6, 2011 Share Posted January 6, 2011 then run like hell! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
american45 Posted January 6, 2011 Author Share Posted January 6, 2011 Most of this made me laugh, by the way, the spoon is made out of gold.And, I take it you read John C. Maxwell? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
american45 Posted January 6, 2011 Author Share Posted January 6, 2011 [quote user="woolybanana"]then run like hell![/quote]Haha, but I hear french women don't get fat, and they age well , and they are pretty erotic ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
american45 Posted January 6, 2011 Author Share Posted January 6, 2011 [quote user="Théière"]If your that worried take a chaperone.[/quote]I've done that before, my date thought my chaperone and I were gonna try to DP her Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
american45 Posted January 6, 2011 Author Share Posted January 6, 2011 [quote user="Molly"]American45That's strange , in the beginning I thought that you were 45 years old . I was certainly wrong ,wasn't I?You say ' a young Franch woman ", But why not saying "A woman of my age ... I am 23 for example ..."That's true that there are lots of "seniors " on this forum . You certainly do not ignore this fact . And we can't have the same approach because of that . Do you have a FB account ? In that case , you can find good friends of your age around you who could answer to your request : French people or American people who could have been in touch with French girls ...Obviously , you seem to be very nervous about this situation . But you have to learn that sometimes in our life we do not get an answer to our questions , and if we get it , we have to understand it and to accept it. It's another step .[/quote]Yeah, I really want my friends thinking I'm nervous about this, that really adds "cool points"Why don't just ask them if they have seen my balls Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
american45 Posted January 6, 2011 Author Share Posted January 6, 2011 [quote user="Cendrillon"]American 45 you have two great answers today from Betty and PaulT so why not just go on the date and see what gives. It's only an outing to see a film for goodness sake, are you a man or a mouse?[8-)][/quote]I already told her I was going, before I posted on this site, so I guess I'm a man? And a smart man for inquiring info about her culture?But I didn't know people where gonna start acting like douchebags (not you) on here, it all went south when I said "most of this info is pretty vague"which it was lol. most of it was like some weird dating advice. I felt like I posted on a online dating community for rejects of society "just read her body language" "pick up on hints" Anyways, I had some good laughs, makes sense that most of the people on here are actually not French Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoddy Posted January 6, 2011 Share Posted January 6, 2011 ...... but perhaps we are as 'culturally backwards' as the French are. Poor us.Hoddy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pachapapa Posted January 6, 2011 Share Posted January 6, 2011 Sign on and get some practice.[I]http://www.meetic.fr/ky/landing_g2.php?mtcmk=004993&tckka=110106225715213878&gclid=CPiGx63JpqYCFUkhfAodF0HskQ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaulT Posted January 7, 2011 Share Posted January 7, 2011 Quite honestly American45 I think anyone carrying on this thread is wasting their time - or perhaps this is a total wind up.From your postings on this site what would people think American culture is?To me it reads as:Timid and frightened to take chances. Indecisive and unsure. Not the people you would want in a crisis. And as for balls (as you mentioned) totally devoid.Paul Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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