Alcohol...

[Ejc]

Hi Afy,

Have been reading this thread with interest - and you have my support and best wishes. It does sound as though your work / life balance is horribly out of wack - and that can't be helping you health issues either. You mentioned you could get work in the UK - could you look into freelancing there and maybe doing a week or two contracts then spending time at home? Do take medical advice and get your ulcers and hiatus hernia dealt with - they're not very nice to live with and can be treated very sucessfully.

It also sounds as though France wasn't your idea...... and that always makes things harder, do you have to stay there? I know most of us are either already living in France or dreaming / planning to do just that - but that's because we want that type of lifestyle, but if you really don't like it - are there any other options open to you? Living in France was a dream for me for years abut until my hubby was also bitten by the bug and really wanted to make the move we couldn't plan anything.

Apart from here in the virtual world - is there anyone you can talk to about everything - your life as well as your health worries - some firms do have access to counseling and if you're at a bit of a personal crossroads it's sometimes hepful to talk things through with a 3rd party and work out what your priorities and wants for the rest of your life really are. As the old saying goes we all need something to do, someone to love and something to look forward to.......

Wishing you all the best,  Liz

[Afy]

Ah well the book coming out I am only a co-author is on something called Windows Communication Foundation. Pretty boring stuff.

Have proposals in for doing one on Software Industrialization, and one on Business Intelligence. Lets see if the publishers bite. I tend to write in spurts, and now abotu 12 years ago also did manage to write some pulp fiction, which of course sank without a trace. So much so that even I do not own a copy... am writing some fiction currently, but it is more difficult than tech books. I have written some poetry, some of which appears on the net (not published by me) and some atrributed to me not written by me. Wierd... Though I havent written poetry in in a couple of decades now.

Also have kicked up the job hunt a notch, and have a major interview on monday. It will be a big change, and the money is likely to be a lot better as well. I have managed to get a work permit for the UK, so I miht even look at working there, and then travelling back on weekends. Not much difference from what I do normally.

Have taken up target shooting again to wipe out some of my stress, I do enjoy shooting. But am not into killing things though I do like eating game. I gave up hunting about 20 years ago.

I am working on the health issues, need to have surgery, but am uncomfortable with it. Have been under the blade way too many times.

Have just been busy off late, putting together a new computer, getting it up and running, catching up with some stuff around the house... prunign a few trees, ensuring that the boiler was done correctly (not). Et al.

[Cassis]

Sounds like you're very busy - don't forget to try to make time to smell the roses - or shoot the targets.

Good luck with the interview on Monday. [:)]

[Chris Head]

You're sounding positive Afy, that's great. Hope a deer or duck doesn't run out in front of that gun thingy of yours!

Tell me how I get my head around Frontpage, I want to start making another website but the whole lot is Chinese to me!

[TWINKLE]

Sounds great!  Actually I had a feeling that the gun was for letting off steam.

Lots and lots of luck for the job interview Afy!

[Lori]

Long time no update.

[TWINKLE]

Lori!

I was thinking exactly the same thing this morning and was going to bring the thread up again later.

Where are you Afy?

[Lori]

Twinks - He may be traveling.  I'm sure he will update us as soon as he is back here.  I think of him often and hope he is coping.

Was happy to hear your get together in the SW went well.  Maybe one day you will be near Avignon and I can participate.

 

[TWINKLE]

I'd love that!

[Afy]

Yes am travelling. Dealing with waay too many issues at work and at home.

Not much else happening. Am around Chester/Manchester currently... with very limited  internet connectivity. It sucks

[Tresco]

[quote user="Afy"]

 Am around Chester/Manchester currently... [/quote]

We've got the biggest grey sky here, Afy. It's only been like this for two days, but I'm starting to long for some red brick buildings to break it up. Say hello to Manchester for me![kiss]

[TWINKLE]

Weather's horrible here to-day as well.  Very welsh - I always get homesick at this time of year! 

Keep your chin up Afy sweetheart!

[Lori]

Weather's been pretty bad around "sunny" Provence too.  Although, today looks better.

Come back and talk to us when you have better connections Afy.

 

[Afy]

Well am still in Chester/Manchester. Work pressures are fairly high, doing about 10-12 hr days.

Having trouble with the booze...unfortunately. And do smoke the odd ciggarette... but I am not beating myself over the head about that.

Luckily I will get the last week of the month off... so I should be able to post a lot more. Weather is horrid, and the hotel I am in can even mess up fish and chips...

[Cassis]

Any fish and chips are better than none and the weather's not much better here!  Chin up. [:)]

[Lori]

Sorry to hear it Afy.  The weather in Provence is not much better, rain, fog, clouds.  You have a tough schedule.  It must play havoc on any "cut-backs" you might wish to make.

Do your best.  Post when you have the time off.

 

 

[P]

Afy

 

Only just discovered this thread and read all the posts.

 

Cannot agree with the hostile responses that you received.

 

My Mother is an alcoholic – her words even after being dry for 16+ years. She joined AA and for her it was the group thing that did it. As someone said, they are amateurs – just as they are / were amateur drinkers. She has now found that she does not need AA – she is now in control. So there is light at the end of the tunnel.

 

You seem to have hobbies starting, and that should lead to friends.

 

You said that you wrote ‘pulp fiction’ but it had no success. I would have thought that success does not matter – but it does provide you with a means of doing something different. Perhaps writing technical books is a little too like work.

 

Someone did suggest contributing to other topics. As you are clearly very knowledgeable about computing matters, contribute to the computer / phone etc section. There are always people seeking help. Whilst it might be like work hopefully people will be grateful for your help and post messages to that effect, thereby raising your self esteem.

 

You also do not like France. May I suggest that you try a different mindset. Thinking ‘I hate this place’ will only bring you down. Try, as hard as it might be, to find some good things about France (hopefully there are some) and dwell on these. Perhaps also try to do something about learning French so that you are not so isolated.

 

Marital problems are never easy. I wonder if the feelings that you have are also felt by your wife. Which would mean that you both have the same problems. I know it can be difficult but is there any way in which you can look at the difficulties and try to find a solution. Could something that you do jointly be teaching / learning French.

 

Do try to become more positive thinking – just think of all the contributors to the thread that you started and their support for you.

 

The operation also seems to be a big thing playing on you mind. One way of getting it off of your mind is to get it carried out and I will then be that problem out of the way.

 

Best wishes

 

Paul