Pommier Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-13973331 Mother in law seems a bit harsh, but the daughter in law to be doesn't appear to have wanted to impress! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frederick Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 The Email : Carolyn Bourne's email to Heidi WithersFrom: Carolyn BourneTo: Heidi WithersSubject: Your lack of mannersHere are a few examples of your lack of manners:When you are a guest in another's house, you do not declare what you will and will not eat, unless you are positively allergic to somethingYou do not remark that you do not have enough foodYou do not start before everyone elseYou do not take additional helpings without being invited to by your hostWhen a guest in another's house, you do not lie in bed until late morning in households that rise early; you fall in line with house normsYou should never ever insult the family you are about to join at any time and most definitely not in public. I gather you passed this off as a joke but the reaction in the pub was one of shock, not laughterYou regularly draw attention to yourself. Perhaps you should ask yourself whyNo one gets married in a castle unless they own it. It is brash, celebrity-style behaviourI understand your parents are unable to contribute very much towards the cost of your wedding. (There is nothing wrong with that except that convention is such that one might presume they would have saved over the years for their daughters' marriages.) If this is the case, it would be most ladylike and gracious to lower your sights and have a modest wedding as befits both your incomes.One could be accused of thinking that Heidi Withers must be patting herself on the back for having caught a most eligible young man. I pity Freddieread more: http://www.tntmagazine.com/tnt-today/archive/2011/06/30/mother-in-law-s-email-on-bride-s-bad-manners-goes-viral-read-it-here.aspx#ixzz1QmWw3ZkS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
idun Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 I think that that was disgraceful, especially as it was the groom's step mother, not even his mother, awful woman. I do feel for the girl it was addressed to and I'm glad that she has had her revenge although I expect that there will be enough grumpies who believe that the step mother was in her rights. It isn't as if I don't have house rules, I have some, but I am pretty cool about most things and so I should be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Coeur de Lion Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 I think most of what she said was justified in saying it, but not all.The lying in bit wasn't a problem, but the table manners it sounds like the girl was out of order.At least the girl knows where she stands. Nothing worse than having the cold shoulder treatment without knowing why. I think that would be worse.But it sounds like there are other problems. Good luck to the groom who will be caught in the cross fire! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frederick Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Its not going to be a press free wedding now is it ? There will be cameras there to record the punch up ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Coeur de Lion Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Expect some reality tv show on it.Wonder how much money the mil and bride will make out of it ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Edward Trunk Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 My mother-in-law was at death's door. I was all night trying to pull her through. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Russethouse Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 While I think the DIL lacked manners, or consideration the MIL could have handled it differently. The comments about the wedding/castle/money/ were uncalled for and kind of 'noveau riche' one NEVER mentions money, yours or any one elses or lack there of.[:)] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YCCMB Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 It's a classic "pot and kettle" scenario, isn't it? Even if the prospective step-daughter-in-law is totally unlikeable, the m-i-l sounds like the troll bitch from hell. I can imagine that if the wedding does ever go ahead, there'll be one hell of an "atmosphere". I see that the girl's parents have waded into the fray by making some comments to the press today. I imagine they're smarting quite a bit from being told (indirectly) that they should have been saving for their daughter's wedding!! Bloody cheek! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KathyF Posted June 30, 2011 Share Posted June 30, 2011 Talk about a clash of cultures.... Anyone may think this kind of thing about someone else, but to email it - the mind boggles. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Russethouse Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 Just as DIL is in ignorance of how to behave as guest, so the MIL is in ignorance of email etiquette. [blink] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catalpa Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 Hey Betty... [:D]... how's life at the castle? [6]--------------There's a fuller version of the email on the Sky News site. It appears Heidi has diabetes which might explain (although there are no facts on which to base this conjecture) her stating some specific dietary requirements, having some issues with how much she was given (or perhaps when they were given it) etc. However, the Step-Ma-In-Law-From-Hell's attitude to Heidi's diabetes is pretty gobsmacking too.I think SMiLFH's behaviour has obviously been assiduously learned from watching copious repeats of the Hyacinth Bucket series. The full text is on the link below. My sympathies lie with poor Bomber the dog. He never asked for this sort of invasion of his privacy, making his trauma a subject of public speculation. http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/UK-News/Mother-In-Law-Email-Carolyn-Bournes-Stern-Etiquette-Message-To-Heidi-Withers-Goes-Viral/Article/201106416021513?f=rssIf that is really the full text, the woman sounds positively bonkers and certainly vindictive. Or perhaps she is just unable to contain her resentment that a younger, more dynamic and perhaps more popular female is joining the family and the attention is switching from her and her carnations. Poor Freddie's dad! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Coeur de Lion Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 Isn't it funny how these things start out with just extracts from a larger thing and we make judgments and then more info comes to light which change those initial judgments?I should know better by now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Russethouse Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 I wonder if step mother in law had already attempted to have a word, either with DIL or indeed her step son ?Most diabetics take 'rations' with them and most hostesses ask in advance if there are dietry requirements......or the guest makes the info known before the visit if it could cause problems...six of one and half a dozen of the other here me thinks....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoddy Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 We could of course use this thread to tell stories of our own children's near misses .......Hoddy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YCCMB Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 [quote user="Catalpa"]Hey Betty... [:D]... how's life at the castle? [6]Spiffing, thanks! Kate appears to have little in common with Heidi and is the epitome of breeding and good manners. P'raps that's why Carolyn Bourne is so bitter: apparently Freddie is one of Kate's mates. She's probably quietly humming "It should've been me" into her Lapsang Souchong. My invite to the "other" Royal Wedding this weekend has also got lost in the post, though...[:(]Hope all's spiffing with you, too-------------- My sympathies lie with poor Bomber the dog. He never asked for this sort of invasion of his privacy, making his trauma a subject of public speculation. I agree Bomber is the real Innocent Victim. Mind you, she probably sends him e-mails reprimanding him if he moults on the furniture. It's a dog's life.[/quote] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Russethouse Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 I agree Bomber is the real Innocent Victim. Mind you, she probably sends him e-mails reprimanding him if he moults on the furniture. It's a dog's life.LOL I used to go to 'general ' auctions at Drewett Neat in Newbury - well to do folk in the vicinity - good quality of furnishings, bric a brac etc. Several times I saw people buying pretty nice sofas especially for the dogs, so they could moult until their heart was content.Sadly they no longer have general sales [:(] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frederick Posted July 1, 2011 Share Posted July 1, 2011 Nothing wrong with that. The parents of a friend I had years ago bought a sofa just for their Great Dane . If anybody sat on it the dog used to try and sit on their lap Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Please sign in to comment
You will be able to leave a comment after signing in
Sign In Now