milestone

[mint]

As though you need another depressing topic in November.................

When you are young, milestones are wonderful:  you cut your first teeth, you take your first steps unaided, you go to your first school, you have your first boy/girl friend, etc.

However, I passed a milestone today, one that depresses me utterly.

I went for a sports day in a tiny village nearby. The event was so well subscribed that I reckoned I had the last parking spot.  Day started off well, there were VTTists, runners, walkers and I was with a very small select group of 5 nordic walkers.

The distance was only 17 kms; good, I thought, I'd eat that, no sweat.  The course was very dénivelé, so up and down I went, par for the course for our part of the Dordogne until I had done about two-thirds of the route then, I came to a steep bit that is muddy and slippery. I released the wrist straps on my sticks and I threw myself forward to grap a tree trunk.

Missed completely and I learnt the meaning of the expression fall flat on your face.  Which was what I did, heavily as I had a backpack.  Spectacles flew off, bit the inside of my mouth, completely winded.  Someone asked if I was OK, I couldn't answer (no breath at all) but just managed to hold up a thumb to signal, all right, but please just go ahead so that I can pick myself up and get my breath back.

Managed to finish the course, but with some souvenirs, black eye, massive bruise on my chest where I fell on one of my sticks.

So, this is the horrible milestone I have passed....I have decided that I will never go on such a long organised jour sportif ever again and, in fact, I don't think I will go on any walks longer than 12 km again.

Maybe, on my own and at my own pace but can no longer keep up with youngsters who run along and take hills and dips with leaps and bounds.

So, if you have passed any significant milestone, I wouldn't mind hearing all about it. 

I really, really thought I'd keep my level of physical activity for a few more years but alas, I now understand only too well de Gaulle's opinion that la veillesse est un naufrage[:'(]

[woolybanana]

You have all my sympathy, little Nimt.

Maybe you could substitute walking time with a bit more cooking; I suggest you begin by making really tasty milestone, but with only the very best Italian ingredients.

I am due to reach a nasty milestone soon enough and am not looking forward to it at all.

[mint]

What, you're going to become a mormon and become all smiley and teetotal?

[NormanH]

I have passed too many of these in the last few years and they are too painful to write about, so I will tell you about the tiny things that sometimes let me feel that I can still do things I thought were gone.

1) I use BlaBla car. I travel between the village and town with strangers who give me a lift, and quite often they are much younger. The last driver was only 19 but careful and considerate, and in my small way I feel that I am hitch-hiking. OK very small, but as my other outings are by taxi ambulance to medical appointments these trips feel positively daring.

Even more so is my outrageous behaviour on my mobility scooter, riding the wrong way up one-way streets(on the pavement) or switching between pavement and road to beat bottlenecks .

Both of these make me feel a teenage rebel again, although I will never drive or ride any sort of motor vehicle again and am almost housebound.

In other words, for each milestone on the path to complete dependence there are lamps by the side of the road to lighten the trip.[:)]

[mint]

Yes, I like that:  lamps by the side of the road. 

[Loiseau]

Poor mint. I am so sorry to hear you are black and blue. Not to mention the loss of dignity that you endured...

I fell headlong in my garden the other day, and it is a horrid feeling as it dawns on you what is happening. Luckily in my case no damage done, as I fell on the gravel and not on any tiles or concrete. And no one around, so no loss of dignity entailed!

Bonne guérison.

Angela

[Cendrillon]

Sending loads of sympathy to one and all.

Mint carry on with the Nordic walking just avoid mud and race events.

Today I am taking out a group of Nordic walkers. Having walked the route last Saturday I now know where the muddy section is and will avoid that.

Don't stop, just proceed with caution.

Take care!

[suein56]

Centillion wrote: Don't stop, just proceed with caution.

Now that I can relate to ; wise words.

Mint if you are still capable of a good 12km you are doing much better than me. Half an hour is now my maximum, which is disappointing but bearable.

And even though my swimming time is much reduced too - the fact that I am still able to move through the (hopefully warm) sea with birds wheeling overhead under a blue, blue sky fills me with happiness.

We do what we can.

Sue

[PaulT]

Centillion wrote: Don't stop, just proceed with caution.

He should have added 'have the wine after the event' :)

Hope you heal soon

[mint]

Thank you for your words of advice and encouragement[:)]

I think I overdosed on the self-pity a bit.  Nevertheless, the first time you realise that you can no longer do something, it does come as a massive black blow, doesn't it?

You grieve for a younger, fitter self and for a past life lived in complete ignorance of what might be to come.

It's like some ingenious pre-paid, debit card that gives you a huge amount to get on with and there is no definite date to pay off your debt.  You spend, sometimes wisely, sometimes with abandon with no thought for consequences and then, out of the blue, your credit is reduced, you have to cut back drastically, you like it not one bit but then you think, it's OK, I still have a lot left and I can survive on what's left if I am really careful!  

[Judith]

MInt,

I do know exactly how you feel ... I have been unable to walk very far for some time now, though I hope that ability will return when I get my new hip in Feb (fingers crossed).  But, my real milestone was when I finally accepted 2 years ago that I was not going to be doing my ballet class again ... my feet as well as my hips could no longer do what they could and it was really annoying to know exactly what I should  be doing, seeing the young girls not getting it right, and being unable to show them ... since I'd been dancing since I was 7 years old it did come hard. 

After that I did try to continue exercising with pilates, but that became too painful so had to stop that too ...

But I have promised myself that once I am whole again (though feet will never go en pointe again!) I will at least walk more and try some exercise classes, though whether I can find or even do another ballet class now is doubtful.  Shame, mais c'est la vie!

[Patf]

Mint - was it you who did the Compostelle pilgrimage not long ago? I'm not surprised you're upset after having completed that. But I seem to remember there were a few crises then.

As others have said, just keep going, but maybe less demanding routes. I walk less distance than I used to do, but try to do at least half an hour per day. My problem is that in warm weather I have a pain in my calf after about 200m and have to take a break (I've had it checked out.) Now the cooler weather is here I'm trying to increase the distance, and go back to the hilly routes. Which are much more interesting, and so many of them around us.

Judith - I hope your op. is a success, mine was. After the op. I gradually lengthened my walking distance, and after about 8 months was fitter than I'd been for a long time.

[NormanH]

Patf: have you tried elasticated stockings? I have to wear them post-DVT as well as  warfarin-type blood thinners, but they are supposed to help support the veins in the legs in any case..

[Gardengirl]

Mint, I was sorry to hear about your mishap and hope your bruises are clearing up - especially that black eye!

I know the feeling of having to acknowledge that the time has come to rein in enthusiasms a bit; not a nice thing to have to admit to oneself and you learnt it in a brutal way.

I've had to learn to limit walks I go on to shorter, more level ones, my gardening sessions aren't as active as they were, plus I've had to give up pilates and my activities with our grandchildren are more 'granny-like' than they used to be.

But life goes on and I think we're lucky - the alternative is much worse!

Judith, very best wishes for your op in February.

[mint]

Yes, I did realise that it's a bit of a depressing subject but I don't regret starting this thread.

Many have now come here to tell us about their own milestones.  And often, it is precisely on a forum like this where we are all "anonymous" that we can express our worries and niggles.

For those of us with no family near us and, like me living with just the OH, it's good to get it all off our chest, so to speak.

Of course, we lighten it for our nearest and dearest, no point upsetting them as well, is there?[:)]

[woolybanana]

Great Bobo in a bucket, imagine Norman wandering the pavements of Beziers just wearing elasticated stockings, riding a pedestrian killer, dosing on rat poison and saying "I missed an opprotunity...." How many offences can he have committed?

[Chancer]

[quote user="mint"]
You grieve for a younger, fitter self and for a past life lived in complete ignorance of what might be to come.

[/quote]

 

Get straight back into the saddle Mint, the younger person is still there, ce se passe dans le mentale! get back on the horse and do a longer walk to give yourself a positive milestone.

 

I never had a younger fitter self and in fact was ignorant of what it felt like to be one so for me I really am living a new life but age will eventually catch up but for the moment its me doing the catching up, catching up lost time.

 

My milestone was to run 5km last Tuesday in 20' 48s on an unknown urban route after dark, I do the actual race this Sunday so hope to improve on that, at my age my running times should be decreasing but as I only recently took it up I am still improving, massively so since joining a new club. I have had a couple of injuries and had to hobble home once or twice, everyone was convinced I would be out of action for 3 months including all the youngsters, for that is what they do, they follow their médecins orders, me I rely on the power of positive thinking and believe that one good nights sleep is all it will take and to date that has been true, they are gobsmacked when I turn out to run (well hobble in fact) the very next evening.

 

I am also pleased to see that the FFA has changed the classes and that i am no longer a veteran 2 but a masters 2

 

Get stratight back in the saddle, dont let it put you off, learn from it, use it or lose it!

 

 

[mint]

Yes, Chance, I often think of you doing your running and your diving when I am also pushing myself to the limit.

Alas, in some ways I could have foreseen having to stop the longer nordic walks.  I don't think I'd hesitate to walk these distances on an ordinary rando but not the nordique which is a lot more energetic.

For a few months now I have had a painful right knee after even a short walk of say 5 km.  Then I noticed in my gym class that I can't straighten my legs, for example, to touch my toes without the back of my knees pulling and hurting.  So, I have recently changed my gait:  instead of striding straight out from the knees, I now make the long strides from the hip.  That seems to have sorted out the painful knee problem.  The knee is still very stiff after a walk but no longer painful.

Hooray, I thought knee sorted, which was why I was keen to do 17 km when there was a shorter circuit of 10 km.

The truth is though that, for quite a time, I have come home from walks feeling very, very tired.  I think that on Sunday, it was my tiredness that induced the error of launching myself forward to grasp a tree trunk and missing.  I must have done things like that dozens of times and never missed.

 I like the idea of absolutely refusing to give up and I applaud you for doing it.  However, I now do things for enjoyment and if something is no longer enjoyable or inducing stress, then I will stop. 

I don't know how long it will be before the eye specialist says my cataracts are ready for removal but, in the meantime, I do find that I am not as confident as I used to be.  Driving in fog or in the dark or parking the car in narrow spaces are also activities which I'd just as soon not have to do.

Is that giving up or being sensible?  I don't really know but I know what stresses me out and it could be that I am getting softer but I don't do self-induced stress anymore.

[NormanH]

"Life is a casting off".

Especially with ageing one constantly comes across things that one  can no longer do or will never do again, but one  just 'casts them off'....abandon them and try to forget or try to find other things to take their place.

However 'cast off' also means to finish off a completed, knitted item and thus conveys an

affirmative sense of accomplishment as well as a more somber recognition

of loss.

You did them in the past and can be happy and proud that you did.

[Chancer]

No question that your compromised eyesight will have played a part, you will roll back the years and gain lots of confidence once you have the cataract operations.

I became very clumsy when I had but one working eye after my series of operations, I now have mono-vision so do not have the balance and confidence that i once had but the brain has done a great job in adapting, I am now getting a cataract in my good long vision eye, it will get progressively worse over several years before they will operate, I cannot drive as fast as I used to especially at night but it only really affects me on the race circuit (had a full day last week) I always have to run on the road and not the pavements as I cant see the changes in levels plus I am uncomfortable running in a close group especially with people on my blind side.

 

Last week we ran in a wood (sous bois?) and it was really nice but I had to let all the others leave me well behind, the warm up circuit was OK but after they were running at 12kph and all I could do was to jog at 9kph but it was still faster than I could run safely, it was quite terrifying, funnily enough when its virtually pitch black and if people dont have headtorches I can run as fast or even faster than they can because I am adapted to walking/running with poor visibility, my soles of my feet become the sensory input.

 

Dont allow  it to knock your confidence

[Judith]

PatF: many thanks for your encouraging words and best wishes.  I have told myself, that even though I have quite enough to keep me going every day without going out of the house, I must start going out for a walk every day once mended, even if it only around the block, which is not very exciting, but it is outside.  Currently my exercise consists of walking around the house and garden, a long thin plot, but I cannot get up any speed at all now, or it hurts!

Still, it all happened very quickly, so I am not yet immobile, just slow!

Though at the moment, I'm having trouble with a tooth, with a mouth that feels like it has been through the ringer, and though now being in the process of having a crown fitted, the end is in sight.  However, it  has taken my mind off the hip for now! 

[Judith]

[quote user="NormanH"]"Life is a casting off".

Especially with ageing one constantly comes across things that one  can no longer do or will never do again, but one  just 'casts them off'....abandon them and try to forget or try to find other things to take their place.

However 'cast off' also means to finish off a completed, knitted item and thus conveys an

affirmative sense of accomplishment as well as a more somber recognition

of loss.

You did them in the past and can be happy and proud that you did.

[/quote]

Nice way of looking at it - thank you NormanH!

[Judith]

Mint, when I had my cataracts done (4 yrs ago now - wow!), that was another milestone for me - for the first time ever I could see without glasses ... and it will be one of your positive milestones when it happens for you. 

I do understand about the driving in the dark and fog though, I hated it, but it was sometimes necessary in the winter months.  It was only when I had the cataracts done and my new eyes that I realised not only how little I could see beforehand, but how little I had really seen all my life!

So one negative milestone will be cancelled out by a positive one, and you will take on board new interests which you could not do before, or at least for some time.

Courage!

[mint]

So very lovely to be among my virtual friends and people who are encouraging and positive.

I have loved all your posts and imbibed liberally of your wisdom, thoughtfulness and kindness.

BTW, if anybody has any bruises or pains from impacts, there is nothing better than arnica gel; works like a magic potion![:)]

[NormanH]

[quote user="woolybanana"]Great Bobo in a bucket, imagine Norman wandering the pavements of Beziers just wearing elasticated stockings, riding a pedestrian killer, dosing on rat poison and saying "I missed an opprotunity...." How many offences can he have committed?[/quote]

Here is one I won't be committing again [:D]

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