Why do you stay in France?

[Miki]

[quote user="Tresco"]

[quote user="Cassis"]

Well spotted, Will!  [:D]

[/quote]

He's so quick, he should be a mod![:)]

[/quote]

Naughty Tresco...............[;-)]

[Dick Smith]

Miki

Just read the bruddy PM!

[hastobe]

[quote user="Dick Smith"]No, Pads, I am serious. SB doesn't need to be insulted like this for telling the truth - please don't aid and abet the insulter - this isn't a case where a little throwaway remark makes it all better.

[/quote]

Which rather implies that's SB's comments are far more valuable than those that followed.  Ironic that your post seemed to be just as insulting.  There's no point criticising someone then doing exactly the same Dick - unless its was your intention to flatter by mimicry? 

I'd forget the milk Pad's - Dick will only turn it sour

Kathie

[Pads]

[quote user="hastobe"][quote user="Dick Smith"]No, Pads, I am serious. SB doesn't need to be insulted like this for telling the truth - please don't aid and abet the insulter - this isn't a case where a little throwaway remark makes it all better.
[/quote]

Which rather implies that's SB's comments are far more valuable than those that followed.  Ironic that your post seemed to be just as insulting.  There's no point criticising someone then doing exactly the same Dick - unless its was your intention to flatter by mimicry? 

I'd forget the milk Pad's - Dick will only turn it sour

Kathie
[/quote]

[;-)]

[Miki]

[quote user="Dick Smith"]Miki

Just read the bruddy PM!

[/quote]

I have, give me a chance to reply for gawds sake !!

[Tresco]

[quote user="hastobe"][quote user="Dick Smith"]No, Pads, I am serious. SB doesn't need to be insulted like this for telling the truth - please don't aid and abet the insulter - this isn't a case where a little throwaway remark makes it all better.
[/quote]

Which rather implies that's SB's comments are far more valuable than those that followed. 
[/quote]

Well I was the first person to reply to what I saw as ill judged criticism of SB. It is a lazy quote to use, and I can't think of anyone it is less applicable to then she. If anyone at all.

[Dick Smith]

There is a general consensus here that 'running away' to France is not a good idea. And it may well not be, but there is, or could be, another case.

There are times in people's lives which are stressful, hard and difficult. I won't go through a list of them, but everyone can think of times which have stretched their emotional endurance to the limit. What is wrong with saying, "I'll draw a line under that, and make a fresh start."? It doesn't mean failure, but may meet the need to go away from things which remind you of the bad times and start again. Gosh, I almost quoted Kipling there!

Would anyone say that case applied to them?

[Dick Smith]

[quote user="hastobe"][quote user="Dick Smith"]No, Pads, I am serious. SB doesn't need to be insulted like this for telling the truth - please don't aid and abet the insulter - this isn't a case where a little throwaway remark makes it all better.

[/quote]

Which rather implies that's SB's comments are far more valuable than those that followed.  Ironic that your post seemed to be just as insulting.  There's no point criticising someone then doing exactly the same Dick - unless its was your intention to flatter by mimicry? 

I'd forget the milk Pad's - Dick will only turn it sour

Kathie

[/quote]

Eh? Lost me there, I'm afraid. Flatter by mimicry?

[Pads]

I do think it was just a lazy thow away comment , not ment to insult as Im sure Logan knows nothing of the ladies past as neither did I until I was told. Unless some one writes there full life history on every thread some one can easily insult you with out knowing , There is a lot of banter on these threads some of which in the past I myself have found hurtful, but you cant take life that seriously or you will be a basket case , Plus I have enough sence to know a innocent comment was not said to hurt me, but some one just trying to be funny, some thing everyone on here has done from time to time. Has any one asked  Logan if he meant to insult or weather SB is insulted are are we just jumping to conclusions   

[Cassis]

[quote user="Dick Smith"]There is a general consensus here that 'running away' to France is not a good idea. And it may well not be, but there is, or could be, another case.

There are times in people's lives which are stressful, hard and difficult. I won't go through a list of them, but everyone can think of times which have stretched their emotional endurance to the limit. What is wrong with saying, "I'll draw a line under that, and make a fresh start."? It doesn't mean failure, but may meet the need to go away from things which remind you of the bad times and start again. Gosh, I almost quoted Kipling there!

Would anyone say that case applied to them?

[/quote]

Almost.  Not so much running away as being pissed off with big business, constant "restructuring" and looking for an alternative.  The rest I would not argue with, though. [:)]

[Dick Smith]

I felt that way in the 80s but we felt that with kids, and relatives still alive in England it wasn't possible, however attractive it was as an idea.

[Pads]

sorry which part of your pm did i repeat

[Dick Smith]

I have PM'd you again. Please read it.

[Tresco]

I do think it was just a lazy thow away comment , not ment to insult as Im sure Logan knows nothing of the ladies past as neither did I until I was told. (Pads)

Yes, but that's the thing. We can't really be lazy on the internet, because it's so easy to inadvertently get it 'wrong'.

I really try not to insult people inadvertently (or otherwise). I haven't asked Logan. S/he can speak for him/herself.

[Pads]

Is it going to be as patronising as the last one?

[Dick Smith]

No, it's asking you to think about what you are writing.

[Miki]

Many on here now,  have no idea about Rumzigal (SB) The truth is, she only ever intends to show the alternative side, not the only side ! But that seems to put fear in to people, why ? You can all continue to love France, she has no intention of denying you that. Why does it all appear to threaten your own thoughts.She makes light of her problem here and jests but it appears to be going over the heads of many folk. Sure, there is a serious undertone at times but so what? I think the irony in her posts is lost, I really do.

Post and praise France, that's no problem, we all see things differently, so if one says it is disgusting in Paris, another one can just as easily say but it's lovely in Geneva. Different areas, different people, all have a case but when something truly comes down to experience, I trust just  a small handful of people on here, when it comes down to all things French.

I don't mean that as disrespectful to others but I know exactly who I would ask, if needed further advice for  most things to do with France. As for asking anyone "Are you having a good time in la Belle France" well where would I start ? I hope everyone is/has but the truth for many of us, is that we now see right through things that many seem frightened to see or ...maybe luckily, will never have reason to know or the want to know. Behind all the facade is much aggro, many problems. The lucky ones, as has been said by SB, are the ones that retire here or have a foot in both countries. Being poor lost its attraction to me nearly 35 years ago when I lost too much money on a nag ridden by my the longfellow.....never ever felt the want to be broke and penniless again, it's not a lot of fun.

So by all means tell those of us with some experience it counts not a lot, that's OK but I would like a pound for every newbie that was given help from those  experienced here with a trade or just those with life experience coupled with having been though the system from back to front and from side to side. The picture I and others could describe, would be far different from those who come over to retire and do up or buy a nice place to spend their life in France in. I think maybe it is that that some can't handle, people telling it all from a position they will never know. And I say, lucky them, I really do. You will probably never know all the hassles you would have avoided by  not working, living as well as putting kids through education, not an easy thing to do, put a kid from Maternelle to Uni.

Many will accept it and be glad they won't ever have to go through it, others will think we are joking and others will think we are saying how it should be seen by all. Well I believe we are not, we are offering the other side of life here, no more no less.

 

[Bugsy]

Not sure if I can spell it Miki but that was very eloquently put and I totally agree that living here in a retired capacity as we do  is a completely different kettle of fish compared to having to work and/or putting kids through school.

 

[The Riff-Raff Element]

[quote user="Cassis"][quote user="Dick Smith"]There is a general consensus here that 'running away' to France is not a good idea. And it may well not be, but there is, or could be, another case.

There are times in people's lives which are stressful, hard and difficult. I won't go through a list of them, but everyone can think of times which have stretched their emotional endurance to the limit. What is wrong with saying, "I'll draw a line under that, and make a fresh start."? It doesn't mean failure, but may meet the need to go away from things which remind you of the bad times and start again. Gosh, I almost quoted Kipling there!

Would anyone say that case applied to them?

[/quote]

Almost.  Not so much running away as being pissed off with big business, constant "restructuring" and looking for an alternative.  The rest I would not argue with, though. [:)]

[/quote]

Spooky!

Vague long-term aim to move to France based on a deep affection for the place catapulted into action by a sudden onset of management disillusionment coupled with a convenient & generous payment from a company that had decided to stop trading oil because it made their major stockholders nervous. We already had the holiday home, so... But not running away exactly. More running to.

[Tresco]

[quote user="Dick Smith"]There is a general consensus here that 'running away' to France is not a good idea. And it may well not be, but there is, or could be, another case.

There are times in people's lives which are stressful, hard and difficult. I won't go through a list of them, but everyone can think of times which have stretched their emotional endurance to the limit. What is wrong with saying, "I'll draw a line under that, and make a fresh start."? It doesn't mean failure, but may meet the need to go away from things which remind you of the bad times and start again. Gosh, I almost quoted Kipling there!

Would anyone say that case applied to them?
[/quote]

I missed this before.

I think it applies to us, The OH was certain, absolutely, that this was the way to do it. The part I have highlighted in bold is the part where I now think more thought should have been expended on my part.

He's the Francophile. I know nearly everyone will recognise that term. He could be the OPs' OH! He found out all the straightforward 'answers', and set my mind at rest about so many quantifiable things.

What remain for me, are the niggling doubts, (unquantifiable) which bear no comparison to things I thought I would be bothered about.

Edit; I forgot my main point. I'm pretty sure we could have 'drawn the line' in England, now.

 

 

 

[Rose]

Phew - just logged on after a day away and found so much to read.  Some of which was really useful, some I will take on board and consider and some I'm afraid was lost on me... but maybe that was my long day and my brain not working as it should!

As for the move - we have just one or two details to iron out (the devil is always in the detail) but we are still on taget to come out and try our best at a life we've dreamed of for years... we're only renting for at first which we think is the most sensible thing to do.

thanks for all the comments - I never expected such a response... and you were gentle with me too! [:$]

[LanguedocGal2]

[quote user="beryl"]

Please don't be offended because I have named certain names, there may be others but these are the ones that spring to mind  and I am not having a personal attack just making observations.

 It certainly seems that Rumzigal, Teamed Up and Languedoc Girl et al have a good deal of experience of life in France, but I don't think even with all their experiences that they speak for the majority of people on this forum. That they have apparently experienced life at the 'sharp end', have lived in France for an eon or can speak fluent French, doesn't make every one else's experiences less valid ( and I know that they haven't said that is the case either) 

I love reading the perspectives of all people on this forum from the "done it, seen it, bought the tee shirt" brigade to the holiday home owners to those that have yet to make the move. 

It is good to get opinions from all side but not every one will be able to identify with other peoples perspectives and I would suggest that a lot of people that contribute to the forum are generally happy with their lot in France. So they may be retired or gite owners or whatever, but they are generally happy. I would further suggest, that for whatever reason, the opinions of the aforementioned are equally as valid as anybody elses but the majority will not be able to relate to all of them, all of the time.[:)] [/quote]

Beryl, I’m not in the slightest bit offended.

Regarding the views of people on the forum, it's clear that people like myself  (plus a handful of others) are the minorities on the forum.  I decided to contribute simply because I grew tired of reading the very one sided view of France that so many Brits moving into their little enclaves here put out and have been doing for years. If I lived in Spain or Italy or any other country, I would do the same thing.

I’m aware that a lot of people may find my contributions hard to swallow but that’s life. 

Recently, I met a local chap whose organisation works within the construction/renovation/restoration field throughout France . It was a party and very relaxed and so on realising later in the evening that I was from the UK and that I was not your ‘usual’ Brit, he asked me why so many Brits living in their isolated homes drink so much? 

I will not go into the gory details but in short, he said that often when they arrive at a house, even quite early in the mornings, they notice that the owners had already started on the alcohol and, at times, they are even offered beer and other alcohol on arrival. This chap and his colleagues are no teetotallers by any stretch of the imagination but after years of working around the country, this was an aspect of the British immigrants that puzzled him and his colleagues.

This often happens when you can really converse with locals. They reveal things about the British immigrants that they would not of course discuss with their clients or those they meet daily on a ‘bonjour, comment ca va?’ basis. Let’s face it, how often do people in the UK have deep conversations with foreigners who don’t speak English well? You say hello, goodbye and how are you. It’s the same everywhere.

What he seemed to be implying very politely was that many Brits in rural France are bored and are full blown or borderline alcoholics.  This is only his and his colleagues opinion and he was not being malicious or saying that all Brits in rural France were alcoholics but after over 20 years in his line of work, it was such a common occurrence that he wanted to talk about it. I have no idea if he is right or wrong but he felt strongly enough about it to want to discuss it. Ironically, the reason this came up was because he was shocked to learn that a Brit could be a teetotaller. He had never met one of these creatures before. [:D]

However, he did also say that the Brits renovated their homes beautifully.

A high level of integration often means that you hear about the messy issues the glossy French lifestyle mags don’t really like to dwell on. 

I know that many Brits (including myself) are happy in France and there are tons of glossy mags and TV programmes to prove it so a few alternatives views shouldn't bother anyone.

I could of course keep my big mouth shut and I’m sure that there are many within the French lifestyle lot that would prefer that the minorities such as myself and a few other contributors here did just that. 

[Tresco]

[quote user="pale_pink_specs"]

and you were gentle with me too! [:$]

[/quote]

That was probably more by accident than design.[6]

 

 

Only kidding.

           

 

 

 

 

[Will]

LG2, I don't find your contributions hard to swallow at all.

I did think your post above rang a few bells. Not just the British, there are plenty of French in our part of the world who are permanently p***ed - we have one who makes himself a bit of a pest, in quite a sweet way, not offensively, because he is quite an anglophile, seeing the British as being kindred spirits and wants us to go and get drunk with him, like his other British friends do.

In fact the Manchois is known for liking his booze, though, apparently, not as much as those from Finistère.

We're far from teetotal, but unlike many British round here we can go for long periods without drink. To be fair, not all of them are drunks, quite a few have mental difficulties - what sort of picture am I painting?

One thing's for sure, it ain't like the Peter Mayle books.

[mint]

will, OF COURSE it's not like the peter mayle books.  that man worked in advertising, didn't he? (now, don't jump on me if you, or anyone else, are also in advertising.  just trying to lighten things up a little.