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Maybe I'm being naive...


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but I thought forums like this were for exchanging information and ideas and not for making a whole heap of derogatory comments.  I am, quite frankly, pretty horrified by some of the posts I've read recently, some have not made any useful contribution at all to the discussion in hand and have been fairly insulting to all and sundry. 

I'm off now before I offend anyone by saying anything more.

Yours truly

Peace-loving, pooch worshipper

PS Anyone know what's happened to the "voice of reason", Pucette?  I hope she's okay.

 

 

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My OH and I discussed this only this morning. I thoroughly agree with you that there have been some very unpleasant and personal postings recently. However, OH says this is what keeps the forum lively and interesting and is simply proof that it takes all sorts!

Suppose I ought to agree with him as he's usually right about most things (hope he doesn't read this!) but I have really felt sorry for one or two new members who have been subjected to really insulting and completely non-helpful replies.

So I don't think you're being naive at all - or if you are, then I guess I am too!
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I think it is good that it is lively. But there seem to be some posters who never post anything useful and just criticise others. It is true that it is difficult to communicate a tone of voice via a forum, and perhaps some remarks are being misunderstood. Nobody is a mind reader and for example, sometimes people react badly to posters asking about things they think they should have found out before they came, without perhaps considering that some come to France to follow a spouse or just for a short period to study, and therefore perhaps haven't done the research in the say way as somebody who is moving here for life. (this is not at all my situation, it is not a veiled reference to anything!). I would suggest that when people start a topic, it would be great if they were as specific as possible. Also that they fill in the form to say where they are. I might know exactly how XYZ is done in the Rhone, or the name of an association or a translator or whatever, but if I don't know where the person asking is, I would certainly hesitate in posting a (potentially useful) reply.
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We like lively debate too, but request people keep things on a civilised level, and are pleased that most users don't have a problem with this. The forum has a code of conduct, here, http://forums.livingfrance.com/shwmessage.aspx?ForumID=270&MessageID=79187, which we expect users to follow

If users object to any particular posting, please don't hesitate to contact the moderators or admin team. We don't like this sort of thing any more than you do, though unless we actually receive complaints we have to rely on our own judgement in deciding which postings are unacceptable. Following complaints we can contact the person concerned to point out that they are breaching the code of conduct, and, if necessary, issue a formal warning. Any user who receives three such warnings will have his/her registration terminated.

We don't like the idea of banning users but are prepared to be firm when necessary. The person to whom I think you are referring is currently on two warnings.

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Tourangelle, I like your idea regarding location - even if members do not have a web site they can always make there sig indicate their location ie. Gay, Finistere. ( I wish !!) Personally I find it easier if members write the name rather than give the just the number too.

The more information posters give in their initial question the easier it is, and this lessens the chance of plain misunderstandings.

There will always be disagreements and thats fine, everyone is allowed a view and we are all different, as long as people remember not to get too personal, most valid arguments can be expressed without resorting to rudeness.

If you feel someone has overstepped the mark, just report it to one of the mods and we will deal with it appropriately, (even if it about one of us..... !)
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I could be wrong, but I think that the most recent complaints arise from other sections, not the postbag.

I wish I could say I was sat in front of a Dell but this is a mongrel, born out of 'Tiny' upgraded, added to and generally interfered with until the only thing I can say with any certainty is that its mine !
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Gay,maybe I`m being a little naive but who are the main compliants and what are the main complaints,I do know that a certain amount of PMing goes on and to say that a conspiracy between certain members aimed at another could be a little of the mark but not by a great deal.

Most of the time the "whinging, great and the good"just want to close down debate or think that what they have to say is for more important because they think that they are the VIP of the forum,to my self a forum is just that and is for all members.

Life in france is no more or less mundane than life in the UK and some posters post this fact.

 

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I'm all for lively debate, don't get me wrong, but only if it adds value to the original post/question.  It's fine to disagree with someones opinion after all it'd be a pretty boring place if we all agreed with each other but some just need to watch the way it's being phrased.  After all, sometimes it's very difficult to tell what someone means using just words on forums like this.  After all successful communication is made up of different things and only 7% is actually from words.  Easy to misinterpret what's being said without the other bits too.

Anyone been watching "Desperately Seeking Sheila"?

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[quote]but I thought forums like this were for exchanging information and ideas and not for making a whole heap of derogatory comments. I am, quite frankly, pretty horrified by some of the posts I've read r...[/quote]

  Hi- I've been using this site for years now ( a couple of name changes due to connection probs) and every so often a few people add nasty comments. This seems to go on for a while but eventually the fire stops being stoked ( ie- people stop responding to them) and the nasty ones slope off. When it first happened I vowed to never post again but...eventually all goes back to normal. It is a very useful site and there are always things to be learnt,so all in all it seems best just to ignore the "nasties".This is difficult if your first posting gets a personal attack though, I guess these poor people don't post/view the site again?That is a great shame and I suppose a much bigger problem for the moderators?

 

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[quote]Mrs MDW, You have a lovely dog! What breed is it Mrs? I have a dog![/quote]

Thanks Furryknickers (great name BTW)

The piccie is Milly, allegedly a labrador/retriever cross but I've got a choccie lab too.  Just need a black then I'll have a complete set!

Nicola

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I visit more than one BBS during the course of a day, and often come across rude postings, to which I rarely respond in kind.

I have recently had a comment fired at me on here from a regular, which I found rude, so I said so. I did not respond in kind, as the poster had obviously been wound up by some of my anti-Labour coments in one of MY posts. The poster apologised. Fair enough, no problem.

What I won't just "pass" on, is the gratuitous rudeness, arrogance, and apparent racism of one certain member, posting at present. Those sort of posts add nothing, and are, IMHO, a form of bullying. I was always taught to stand up to bullies...................

Alcazar

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Alcazar,PM me with the posters name and the apparent racism posted,that is if it is not stating the fact that it is not a crime to vote for the BNP FN or the one in holland who,s name escapes me for the moment,the leader who was shot dead there in oh so free thinking holland.

 

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If anyone has a problem, it might be best addressed by sending a PM to one of the five Moderators, please. We are all keeping a close eye on the Forum, we all feel quite passonate about 'our' site that all of us have helped create and none of us, and thats speaking for 99% of the Forum members I believe, want to see anyone 'wreck it' for any of us.

So please, if you have an issue, follow the guidelines, we have a procedure we can follow to help keep this a fun and informative place to be.

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outcast

presumably a nasty posting one which falls foul of the forum guidelines. AS you had to ask here's an extract:

You are not allowed to post things that are:

# Are insulting, abusive, racist, sexist, or derogatory in any way to others, whether they are individuals or companies, users of the Forum or not. This includes material sent via personal e-mails through this forum.

# Threaten, intimidate, victimise or harass others.

# Make libelous comments about individuals or companies, including Living France.

# Contain explicit language or vulgarities (whether written in French, English or any other language)

# Impersonates or represents any person or entity in an attempt to deceive, harass or otherwise mislead another member.

# Incites illegal activity

# Infringes intellectual property rights

# Transmit any material that you don't have the right to transmit under law (such as copyright or trade secrets)

# Links to and/or references content not allowed under these guidelines.

# Use the service in a manner deemed inappropriate by Living France

# Impedes or disrupts the flow of the discussions in the Forum

....it's not really all that complicated.
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