Rose

[quote user="cooperlola"]I'm Spartacus.[/quote] [:D]

[:D]

[quote user="NormanH"] I have to say that I don't much miss Dick 'Smith', who seemed to me better suited to the surname of the Chris character quoted above... [/quote] Norman... you naughty boy [;-)]

I found this... oh happy days [Www]

I an envious of your bus service ladies [:D] I so loved Tressy and her posts.  I also loved the double act that was/is JK and Twinks.  When I first joined I so wanted to make friends with them... and I am very pleased to say I did!  And they are just as wonderful in real life as they are on here.   When I joined the forum I never imagined meeting any of the folks on here but we've met a few now... and I have to say that you are all very very lovely!! [kiss]

Idum - I do agree that bad things are everywhere.  After Norman's newspaper link earlier I had a look at my old town's paper and it was also filled with a few horror stories.  I dont think there is a eutopia and wherever there are people, the problems and havoc they create will usually be found too.  However, just as there is a difference between Tottenham and Budleigh Salterton... I'm sure there's a difference between Paris and Montagrier. I think what get's under my skin a little is the feeling that because I'm not seeing it, I must be naive or I've got tinted glasses or I'm blind to it... or that maybe I think France is like "a place in the sun" and maybe I only moved here because I saw it on the TV and thought that would be nice.  Now of course, I know you've not said that... really I do.  But there is an underlying feeling that folks like me are wrong because we dont write bad things.  It's difficult to explain, but I have to say it was that kind of sentiment that stopped me posting as much as I did.  It's important in life to have balance and to see things as they really are.  But seeing things as they really are doesn't mean only seeing the bad.  It sometimes reminds me of the monty python sketch... my part of France is far worse than yours and my experiences were much tougher - I'm not sure how useful it is without some kind of balance. Anyway - going back to what you actually said... yes, I also miss the sea and your reply reminded me of that.  Of all the things I miss, that is the thing that really pulls.  We have considered moving to be closer but we do feel settled here so I think we'll stay put.  I'm a country girl and I'm not sure I could live in a town.  I think about it and it has a certain appeal but I think I would get homesick for the countryside very quickly...horses for courses as they say. And yes, public transport... buses are non-existant where we are (except in the cities).  Trains are great and good value.  Having said that, where we lived in Devon the buses are now limited to four a day and my friend told me last week that it's cheaper to get a taxi if there are two of you... but it would be nice to have the option over here. When we were down near Perpignan we notices they had what seemed like a good bus service... was it all one journey for a euro?  It seemed good but I didn't check in any detail.

[quote user="gardengirl "]I looked back at the thread too, Rose - though it started before my time. I remember you as PPS, and Scarlet too and having met you, I think Rose is just right! [:)] I took to hopping through the thread, which I thought was depressing and also bitchy in parts, and it also seemed very cliquey - which is something I felt very strongly when I joined. It was also very interesting - and I wondered like you how many people are still around. I know quite a number have moved on, but recognise some who are still around, with a different name. Rose, maybe you could bring things up to date on how things have gone for your family, and how settled you all are; those who are still around would be interested - and it might help newcomers - I know there are fewer these days, but there are some!  [:)] [/quote] GG - it was a bit of a scary place at times wasn't it [:D] Things worked out pretty much how we thought they would  and lots of our worries came to nothing.  Maybe we're lucky in that our village seems to have welcomed us, we have fantastic neighbours and our son is happy and doing well at school.  We never expected that I would get cancer... but thank goodness that seems to be taken care of now. I miss friends and England more than I thought I would... but not enough to make me move back.  I'm getting better at the language but it's not easy and it seems the more I learn the more I realise there is to learn.  Having said that my skills have been tested this last year and I seem to be doing ok. We sold our business in the UK which wasn't part of our plan so we had to create a plan B for earning a living - but this too is working well and far less stressful that the commute and running the old business.  It greives me to say this but the worst problems we've had in France have been caused by other ex-pats with too much time on their hands and a desire to intefere in other folks' business... there are a few unpleasant souls around that just seem to want to spuddle... but we've learned to give them a very wide birth. I've learned to loath  DIY - I am so over the joy of building a wall and running electrics [:D]  I hated living in the mess so I'm glad we've virtually finished.  We're extending on the side of the house soon... and yippee... builders are coming to do the work. We are in a good location which I have to say was more luck than judgement. Between Perigueux and Bergerac means we're not far from most things.  There is also always something going so we dont get bored.  We've made some wonderful wonderful freinds here now too. UK Friends and family always ask if we're here for good and we say 'never say never' - None of really know what's in store do they?  All I can say is that I have no regrets about moving over here, I still think my beloved Devon is God's country... but I reckon he had a second home in the Dordogne [Www] It is easy to be seduced by TV programmes and also to read forums like these and get a very weird idea of France.. on the one had it's sold as cheap houses, wall to wall sunshine and the perfect place to be... on the other you'd be forgiven for thinking that everywhere was full of drunks/burglars/suicides/drugs, awful education system and a people that hate the english.  For us we found neither... it's not eutopia, it's a foreign country and there is a lot to learn, not least the language... but it does offer us a lifestyle that we could not have in the UK and for us it has worked.  I can see that it's not for everyone - but for us, for now, it's home. p.s. Idum... what does your name mean or come from?  And why did you change?

I joined this forum in 2007 and my first post ran to 46 pages... and at times was a very scary thing [Www] A few posts that I've seen lately have reminded me of that thread, so I found it and re-read it... and very interesting it was too! http://www.completefrance.com/cs/forums/46/870812/ShowPost.aspx#870812 If you can be bothered to read through this epic... I'd be interested to hear from those still posting... have your veiws changed much/at all?  And if folks aren't posting... do we know what happened to them... did they leave France?  So many old names that are no longer around... the forum seems a different place back then [8-)] p.s. I was then known as Pale Pink Specs... but soon realised that this kind of thing was frowned upon so quickly changed to Rose (had a brief fling as Scarlat for an hour or two an quickly went back to Rose).  Has anyone else changed their old forum name?

[quote user="Sara"]Cooperlola , Rose and anyone else who has cancer. When I made that comment about what an old 'friend 'had said about people who don't think positively enough, I sincerely hope that this did not upset anyone. [/quote] Sara - NO, NO, NO ... you have not in away offended me or upset me and I'm sure Coops will feel the same.  We were just agreeing with you... you're friends crazy... in my opinion [:D] I hope you slept well xx

Hi Coops... I knew really, it was just a good excuse for me to say something gushy [kiss] x

Suey - very funny, thank you! JayJay - long time no see [:D]

[quote user="just john "][quote user="NormanH"]Chocolate sauce with pears :)  [/quote] I'm completely in agreement with Norm; however for the ultimate hedonism, fold hot chocolate sauce into some soft icecream with a shot of cointreau or if desperate some VSOP[8-|]   [/quote] I dont like pears with chocolate sauce but that description made my mouth water [:D] Frenchie - I'd like it warm, greyman would have it cold... he would have creme anglais or cream and I would go with ice cream... I use Creme entier de Normandie and whip it and it makes lovely light whipped cream too. I'm sure it will be lovely whatever... have fun x

Hello Coops - I just wanted to say that I'll be thinking of you and yours and I do hope it all goes well and that you'll soon be sorted. Deborah, you have given so much to other people, quite selflessly, simply because you believed it was fair and just.  As a result, you have a huge number of people now thinking of you and wishing you well... this is a measure of the kind of woman you are... and my point is that because of this you should never be past the pride stage... although of course I know really that it was just an expression and a figure of speach. and... I found this and thought of you... "Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down" see you soon xx

[quote user="cooperlola"][quote user="Sara"] I had said that she believed that if people were 'positive' then they would not get sick! She then went on and said that she believed if people were positive then people would not get cancer! Well, where do you go from there? I knew then what she thought of my husband, just because you can't see pain they think your ok. My husband is positive, if he was n't he would be bed bound by now.... [/quote]You might like this, Sara: http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/jan/02/cancer-positive-thinking-barbara-ehrenreich You can of course skip all the boring cancer stuff, but the bits at the end about positive thinking are interesting.  Oh, and she makes me laugh. [/quote] Sara - my OH has been known to call me a miserable b****r at times so maybe this is why I got my cancer  [:D] Interesting article Coops and I do hope that I'm finding you in fine fettle [Www]

[quote user="Russethouse"] Its always worth enquiring on here about quiet camp sites, any one who belongs to a camping/caravan club may be able to get the info. [/quote] Sorry I'm wandering off the subject here but... That's a good idea RH - we have a couple of good books and we use a forum if we know where we're heading... it's good to get recommendations.  This summer we pulled up at one site but it was full... it was huge so maybe it was a good thing.  We found a lovely little site a few miles further on.  We've just come back from a trip and we stayed in an aire the first night.  We drove into a free spot and got stuck in sand.  Try as we may we couldn't get out.  After a few minutes of trying three lads came over (looked like they'd camped there all summer, not short of tattoos and piercings)  They said we were the 24th  people to get stuck.  They came equiped with jacks and wood and brut force and after a short time had us out and back on firm ground.  We were so grateful, we provided a spot of entertainment for everyone else... there was a little cheer as we drove out... I know it sounds a bit corney but we have found nothing but pleasant friendly folks on our travels.  So maybe doing a bit of research in advance is the key? I did also wonder Sara if there were any groups for carers that you could join... either virtually or real?  So that you can talk to other folks in your situation? (maybe you already do this?)  It is hard caring for others, you do need someone to talk about how things are for you. I also agree with RH in that my dad cared for my mum for nearly 20 years and he was lost when she died... He's had no life and no friends (people do stop visiting as the years go by) and as he's in his 70's he's pretty much stuck in his ways.  If he had tried to keep an independant life of his own I think it would have been a lot easier for him.  He does have his brother close by which is a blessing.

[quote user="Simon-come-lately"]And....the best place to live in the world would be..........??? Simon :-)[/quote] ... wherever I lay my hat [Www]

[quote user="LEO"]it is good to hear from someone not wearing rose-tinted specs! I empathise with what you have written. [/quote] Sara and Leo I really am so very sorry to hear about your horrible experiences.  I don't doubt what your saying and it is very sad.  However, Leo I'm not wearing rose-tinted specs, I am just not seeing what you see. This year so far we have visited  and stayed in the following departments. Aisne Somme Tarn Gironde (3 different sites, 3 different times of year) Gers (3 different sites, 2 different times of year) Haute Garonne Aude (2 different sites and a railway station!) Pyrenees Orientales Pyrenees Atlantique (2 different sites) Dordogne Haute Alpes Alpes de Haute Provence Drome (2 different sites) Haute Loire Correze We mainly stay on campsites but sometimes will stay in Aires.  We always visit during French school holidays or weekends as we have a son at school here, often we've arrived at sites and they've been full so we've had to keep searching... so our visits have been at busy times as well as out of season.  I guess we've just been lucky? Now... if you want to ask me about the sites we stayed at in Italy - well two of the three we stayed in were very busy and very noisy... so we cut the visit short and headed back to the beautiful French Alps. I do hope things improve for you Sara - it sounds like you are having a tough time. p.s. I dont think I'm an old ex-pat... I'm in my 40's with a son at school [:$]

Hope this helps... http://www.biooscientific.com/DetailProduct.aspx?itemId=337&CName=Life%20Science&SubName=Preclinical%20Chemistry&Name=Toxicity

[quote user="sweet 17"][quote user="Rose"][quote user="just john "] That which we call a rose, by any other word would smell as sweet.  [/quote] [:$] [:$] [:$] [/quote] I'm sorry, Rose, nice as you are, how can you smell like me?[:-))] [/quote] Well... maybe you smell of roses?  [:D] And Ploddy... it was cooler yesterday and I put my cardigan on and did get a yearning for colder days when I can feel snug in front of the fire... but then again I'm mighty pleased the sun is back today... so maybe I'm just fickle?

This is normally the kind of thread that I would not reply to... but in light of the other post on 'how we use the forum' I've decided to go for it [Www] I hate this kind of conversation, it reminds me of the Monty Python sketch about 'when I was a lad we slept in a matchbox...' What on earth is integration, isolation and friendship?  When I lived in the UK I lived in a rural Devon village.  I made friends with some of the mums at the primary school but never got to know perhaps 90% of the rest.  I did join the PTA but sat with the friends I knew.  I never went to visit my neighbours, never shared a BBQ with them or went to their children's weddings, never really joined any local groups... although I did go to church once in a while.  I couldn't even tell you the names of my closest neighbours.  Do I feel bad about this... No!   I think it's pretty typical of how people live.  We had young children, busy working lives and a wonderful group of friends and family.  I would of course have offered help if it was needed and people would be friendly and say hello in passing and I certainly thought it was a lovely place to live.  I never asked myself if I felt intergrated... I lived there and was happy. Now we're in France things are pretty much the same but because we're not working and we dont have very young children we have more time to get involved.  I got to know a couple of the mums at the local school, we joined the rugby club and the local walking group.  I could tell you the names of our neighbours and we do share a glass of wine and I consider them good friends.  When I was recently ill, my husband was inundated with offers of help from folks in our village... ranging from looking after our son, to cooking meals to doing his washing.  When I was first diagnosed we did ask ourselves if it would it be better to go back to the UK where we had a strong support network but after a day or two we soon realised that we had an equally wonderful support network right here and if anything this strengthen our desire to stay where we now feel settled. I feel I'm as intergrated as I want to be... or have the time for.  I have a wonderful group of friends (both french and english) and I dont feel isolated... even in the most testing of situations... in fact to be honest I never ask the question of myself... As with my Devon home, I live here and I'm happy. I'm not daft enough to think I'm living in eutopia... certainly there are things about France that can annoy me but the same would be said for the UK.  I think these comparisons prove very little except that different people have different experiences and generalisations are unfair and cruel.  I'm sorry that some people here have had some horrid experiences but it's unfair to assume that it's the same for everyone.

[quote user="just john "][quote user="Rose"][quote user="just john "] That which we call a rose, by any other word would smell as sweet. [/quote] [:$] [:$] [:$] [/quote] But where are you trilling now Rose? The cafe in Riberac was closed last month, I hear the owner had a nervous breakdown after his wife's cancer? [/quote] It has closed but did a few evenings at a nearby restaurant the other side of town.  We're at a wedding tomorrow and a party in a couple of weeks... if we do anything local I'll let you know [:D]

[quote user="just john "]That which we call a rose, by any other word would smell as sweet.  [/quote] [:$] [:$] [:$]

Mrs B - I am so sorry you're having such an unpleasant time. There was a thread last year about breast cancer which you may find helpful... also I know that Kitty and a few others on here have gone through or are going through breast cancer treatment so maybe send them a message?  I'm sure kitty will answer any questions she can. http://www.completefrance.com/cs/forums/2347851/ShowPost.aspx My own biopsy result took a week, but this was post surgery (thyroid not breast).  I had spread to lymph nodes but was told not to worry too much about this as the lymph nodes were simply doing their job. It's a really scary time when you first hear the news but the more you learn and the more you talk to others the less worrying it becomes. Sorry I can't offer any practicle help but do get in touch with Kitty and I do hope you get some answers that help ease your worries very soon

[quote user="idun"] So how do you use this board, do any of you read and re-read and re-read eternally, posting rarely. [/quote] I've not been a member for as long as a lot of you... I'm maybe no longer a newbie but I've still only got one light! I pop in frequently, I use the active topics and see if anything jumps out at me.  If I have more time I'll read more topics and see what's being said.  I'm aware that I miss lots of threads but I always reckon that if something important is relevant to me... someone will give me a nudge, or an email. I do reply but not as much as I did or as much as others.  Sometimes I start to reply and change my mind... maybe I dont feel I know enough, or maybe I think I'm just saying the same as everyone else, sometimes it's because I dont want to get involved in a dispute... but sometimes my hackles are up and I do want to get into a dispute [:$] As for friends... oh yes!  I agree with coops on this one... I've met a few members and I would agree that they were all very much like I expected and I certainly didn't feel like they were strangers to me.  I'm very glad I found this forum, it's a great source of information and friendship and support... and friendship can spring from the most surprising places! If I have one tiny little complaint it would be to agree with another comment that sometimes 'we' can be a bit harsh on newcomers;  I dont find the search on here that great and sometimes I just want to court opinion again... so maybe we could be always be nice to the new people [Www]

Thanks GG - I think he's a little star, but I guess I'm biased [:D] And Coops... yes freedom and independance is everything isn't it... but it could be made even nicer with a flashy set of wheels [:D]