chessie

Apparently about 50 per cent of french people who should have completed this wretched form - have not yet done so. Which is why the gvt has had to extend the deadline. Extended to 31 July - and we all know what happens during July and August don't we ? !! I would be willing to bet that they will have to extend the deadline again until end of October. Personal visits to the tax offices seem to be causing some problems. This could have been eased a bit if they had allowed paper forms to be completed. Not everyone can cope with completing complicated forms on-line on a computer, certainly if french is not your first language. I am aware of several people who, although 'fluent' in french, hate and have difficulty with completing these on-line french forms. I'm surprised that France hasn't allowed paper forms for this return; I thought it was wrong to insist that everyone has to complete this on-line. Has anyone thought of downloading a blank version of this form from their own 'personal space' ? !! Then make it available for us to print off, and send in - as our own personal protest about being forced to do this on-line.......!! Chessie

Menthe - oh thank you for your support - you can stand by me any time - we'll dance in the rain after the storm has passed !! Thank you also for remembering my situation - that's lovely. I'm on my own at the moment, making sure I walk very steadily instead of rushing everywhere, and doing the final check-up of windows and doors last thing at night, on my own, feels very strange. Also I hate things that go bump in the night - never noticed them before....... !! I do accept thunder & lightening storms can be damaging; so can snow - but don't we love walking and playing in the snow; the sea is dangerous - but we all love swimming in clear blue seas don't we? I just find the flashes of lightening and the booms of thunder to be one of nature's great theatrical events - can't help it - my Mum's fault - she loved T & L as well and encouraged me and my brother to come and watch the storms !!!!!!! Chessie

Menthe - oh thank you for your support - you can stand by me any time - we'll dance in the rain after the storm has passed !! Thank you also for remembering my situation - that's lovely. I'm on my own at the moment, making sure I walk very steadily instead of rushing everywhere, and doing the final check-up of windows and doors last thing at night, on my own, feels very strange. Also I hate things that go bump in the night - never noticed them before....... !! I do accept thunder & lightening storms can be damaging; so can snow - but don't we love walking and playing in the snow; the sea is dangerous - but we all love swimming in clear blue seas don't we? I just find the flashes of lightening and the booms of thunder to be one of nature's great theatrical events - can't help it - my Mum's fault - she loved T & L as well and encouraged me and my brother to come and watch the storms !!!!!!! Chessie

I'm a bit of geek about thunder and lightening storms - just love them. I log on to a web-page which gives real time lightening strikes. And my gosh - Poitiers is really having many strikes per minute right now. As earlier on this evening - was Niort. Must have been terrific to watch - anyone on here from either these areas ? Chessie

Didn't watch it - after TW passed on it was never the same. Dear Old TW took great delight in pointing out all the political voting that took place - and he made us laugh at the predictability of it all. But oh yes - I did enjoy reading today's headlines - a real case of 'thanks' to the UK from the ordinary people of europe. Firstly, obviously, for supporting Ukraine - but how wonderful to see the UK coming second. I, too, took it as a vote from the real people of europe for the UK's tremendous arms support and pychological support for the people of Ukraine. And isn't Mr Z a fabulous leader to have for Ukraine at this time. Pure courage and determination - an amazing man - wish there were more leaders with such principles and honesty - and sheer guts.

Hi Lori - and others. Despite my battles, and questions, he was discharged to 'nursing home' for 6 weeks - to lie in bed or in a wheelchair - WITHOUT any physio - without any exercise allowed. I tackled the surgeon, got the usual 'this is what we do in such cases, he can't put any weight on that leg' - and told I could not take him home, despite promising to sign a legal paper releasing the hospital from any responsibility, and with my suggestion of doing so and paying for all private physio and home help sneered at. The b---y system stinks. It is their fault he fell out of the bed, their fault they gave him wrong medicine - their fault he's smashed two of his front teeth - sorry but I am so devastated by what's happened. I was advised by social worker not to visit the hospital on the day he was removed into nursing care. I was promised that all his clothes and possessions would accompany him. They did NOT. He turned up at the nursing with nothing - nothing at all - except the hospital gown he was wearing. When I visited the NH on Friday and was told this - I protested very strongly, said I'd been promised all he had in his hospital room would accompany him - and the NH staff were surprised when I gave them a full list of the clothes, towel, razor, dental and other stuff - none of which had arrived. He is sitting in the courtyard, happily yakking away to the staff, talking, but not really making sense - but looking brighter. I visited him today; brought in a lot of t-shirts and trackie trousers for him (spending spree in Auchen !) - to see him, again sitting in his wheelchair - but surrounded with 'some' - only some - of the smaller items, toothpaste, brush etc had arrived - but not the items of clothing - or his razor. I had compiled a list of everything that was in his room on the hospital ward, ticked off the few items that had turned up, and have insisted - again - that the hospital is told to find them. Have also contacted 'social worker' at hosp who had assured me that his possessions would travel with him. Anyway OH did recognise me when I turned up yesterday (as he has on previous visits to hospital); did seem more involved with what was going on around him - but still tries to get up from wheelchair because 'he wants to have a pee' - but he's restrained - and he hates it. Next battle; find his clothes and razor; try to arrange dental treatment for his smashed teeth; try and watch any physio or gentle exercises that might be laid on by the NH; couldn't be done today - Saturday & Sunday skeleton staff - but should be more staff around next week. I have come home from these visits to the hospital and NH absolutely exhausted - just crash on to the sofa and fall asleep for a few hours - late afternoon/early evening sleeping for a couple of hours - unheard of - something I've never done before now !!! I'm getting old... can't cope with all this stress !!! Thank you for thinking of us - Chessie

Oh - oh - I just love you all - thank you so much. We're down in Dept 47, not far from Villeneuve sur Lot. I do struggle with spoken french, written french I can follow - but we're now going into the territory of medical and legal terminology. Is it 'too English' to assume/hope that any avocat would speak English ? And writing to the director of hospital sounds good - but with meeting the money box person on Wednesday and discharge of OH on Thursday I doubt whether he would - or could - do anything. But he will certainly hear from me shortly after all this is sorted. Writing to the Director is excellent idea - hadn't thought of kicking behind's that far up the chain !! MIGHT ENJOY THAT !! I e-mailed the money box ticker this morning; she'd suggested meeting tomorrow which was impossible for me - car 'n CT - so I suggested Wednesday, with an english interpreter to help me. I have heard nothing from her - not a bean. Maybe she is not at work today - but if I've not heard from her by lunchtime then it means they are ignoring me, my wishes, my request for an interpretor and my rquest for full information about physiotherapy and social facilities at N H. And from the comments from Betise it seems that 'nappy and tie-down' is not uncommon treatment here in France - w - h - a - t ? Does this happen in the UK ? Trouble is OH was dizzy on his feet after op - but being given unnecessary drug wouldn't help, he didn't have a stroke, and if he's unsteady on his feet it is because THEY HAVE MADE him so - because they did not provide physio. It's the old Catch 22 - yes ? Oh - I don't wanna get old - Beatles song there somewhere.......... !! You have all been wonderful, so amazingly helpful - and again friends to the rescue - love this forum. As for 'keeping notes and records' - another excellent idea - thank you Lori. I'm going to clear my head this evening, and ensure I have got everything written down - including my written requests to medical staff translated from english to french - got 'em all. Thank you all so much for help, support and kind words........ I'll be back. Chessie

Betise - no, it was neither of those two drugs; will need to do some digging through papers to find the exact name - but it definitely referred to 'epilepsy' - as did the prescription. Saw him this morning; he was improving yesterday and today he is far, far brighter mentally, and talking. He is STILL harnessed to his chair, still not allowed to stand, to walk, to move - and is still in a nappy. He is aware and bright enough to feel disgusted and ashamed by this - he kept saying he 'hated the nappy' and kept askintg why couldn't he use the loo, and when could he go home because he was fed up !! He knows that 'wearing a nappy' is not right.......and I feel his self-respect and his dignity has been removed. As for using a 'pee' bottle - there isn't one in the bathroom; and the emergency button is on the wakll, across the room, and 12 feet away from him. There is no emergency button for the patient, none. I've taken photos of the harness on the bed, and of him strapped into the harness on the chair. He had his operation a week ago - and has received NO physiotherapy - nothing, absolutely nothing. Shameful treatment. And I was told this morning that he WILL be moved to the nursing home on Thursday, even though the box ticking money grabbing lot haven't even confirmed that we have the funds to pay. I hate this system; it's been impossible to talk to a doctor in charge of the ward who knows their patient - they are never around, never there - or in hiding. I have also discovered that the hospital will NOT do as I requested and run another MRI, CAT scan on his jaw - 'can't be done, has to be by appointment, they will arrange it at the nursing home' - oh yeah - like I believe that. Nothing but a load of b---s--- to keep me quiet. What if we can't afford this? (Well, we can, no probs, but the money tick boxers don't know that). And if I want to - can I refuse to have him moved to a nursing home and instead insist that he is returned home, so I can look after him here, with help. I'd prefer that - I don't trust any of them, anywhere, in any place, with any title.... they seem like little robots, plug in and play, tick the boxes, look at the list, tick the box, look at the list etc etc. And yes, I am very, very cynical of all this. It's the system, the assumption that what these little gods decide is the 'word'; I don't know when he was assessed by the doctor; if he was ever assessed by any b---y doctor - and I can never find out the information I want because the person who can tell is 'never there' - like the grinning cheshire cat they disappear when you want to ask the awkward questions. I really feel like refusing to allow him to be moved to the nursing home. I have a meeting tomorrow with the money box ticker - what if I refused - absolutely refused - to allow his move to the Nursing Home. Would they listen? Can I insist that he is moved to rehab - or discharged to return home? As for a doctor; we don't have one at the moment. Our last GP died a few months ago; none of the doctors within a reasonable driving distance are accepting new patients. so - what now ? And after our doctor died last year - how the heck whould a new doctor really 'know' about my husband; he'd see the medical record from the hospital referring to 'epilepsy' - and without having met my husband, and listened to my complaints, a doctor would know no more about us than the hospital. My husband hadn't seen our last GP for 3 years; I hadn't seen our last GP for 5 years - no need, nothing wrong, no medical problems, nothing to bother a GP about. It is not all rose tinted specs with the french health service; fine if you fall into their little tick boxes - but question anything - you will find yourself up against a brick wall. As my daughter said on the phone last night - 'they don't want to talk to you Mum, they don't want to say anything because they know he fell in their hospital - so they're scared tio say a word'...... Maybe she's right - but their attitude just adds to my worry, distress and concern over what happened to my husband, and what they plan to do to him without any input or agreement from me - his wife, and his legal rep. Does anyone here actually know what my rights really are ? I'm sorry this is so long - again - but gives you all something to read and think about, I hope. But I would REALLY, really, welcome any definite, legal advice concerning MY rights as his legal rep - and what I can insist upon for his continuing treatment. Chessie

Riggers; the 'diagnosis' of epilepsy, made by a non medical person, was made after his concussion and seizure last summer - one seizure following severe concussion is not unusual. He was Never, Ever, tested or diagnosed as epileptic - no test, nothing. When he was discharged from hospital last summer, after 18 hours more or less shoved out the door on a Saturday afternoon, I was handed a prescription form for various medicines one of which I recognised as a drug to control epilepsy. I did not fill this prescription, because I knew it was a mistake - because he'd never been diagnosed . Sadly, it has been entered on his medical records. When he was admitted this time, he WAS given the drug to control his 'epilepsy' - and he would have been on the drug from the day of his admission, Tuesday 26 April, his op took place on Monday 2 May. It was only after I was able to speak to the Ward Doctor on Thursday 5 May was I able to check what drugs he was being given. I was horrified to see that he was on medication for a non-diagnosed condition. I had to insist, very bluntly, that it was a mistake, that he should never be on such a drug and that they were to stop giving him this drug. I had to stand my ground, be extremely insistent - but the epileptic drug has now been stopped. I checked on Friday that he was being given only sedation and pain-killers. It does mean, however, that he would have been given this epilepsy controlling drug, wrongly, for a period of 10 days, for 6 days before his op, and the 4 following days. I have tried to discover whether there are any adverse effects on normal people being this drug by mistake but haven't yet found out much information about this possibility. I even had to correct the anaesthetist when she called on the Monday morning of his operation; I don't think she believed me about this wrong diagnosis because she then asked me if he had stopped driving; as he'd never been diagnosed with it of course he hadn't - no need for him to stop driving. The hospital are now insisting that this previously very fit, ex-sportsman, with absolutely no medical condition - now needs nursing home care - rather than what I want for him which is a physical rehabilitation and physiotherapy. They want to shove him in a nursing home with doddery old people with pre-existing severe medical problems - and that is so, so wrong. This assessment for him to move into nursing home was made in the first day or two after his op - I don't believe there has been any further serious look at his condition. I look at him and I can see him 'coming back to life'. But he is unable to speak clearly due to the damage to his teeth, which also makes me wonder whether he has fractured his jaw. He complained about it being painful to eat when he was biting down on an item of food. I want them to repeat the MRI and CAT scans, also detailed x-rays of his jaw - because I'm concerned they have overlooked damage to his jaw. He HAS been strapped into his bed - they have even put a 'nappy' on him so he can't ask to go to the toilet; he has been strapped into a chair - and left on his own - I saw that with my own eyes - such a sad sight - dreadful. On this ward it seems they do not want him out of bed; he is strapped in using a harness with metal prongs for adjustment and a similar harness when he is sat in a chair. I think I'm going to take some photos when I visit him tomorrow. It's a messy situation; I also feel pressured into agreeing to his move into nursing home because I don't know what rights I or he has about this; and whether I can insist on him being considered for rehab. One other point we all need to bear in mind. For some very odd reason a rehab and physio centre is covered by CPAM; but - and this I find weird; - on medical grounds, medical ie requiring nursing care, any stay in a nursing home is NOT covered by CPAM; how much you are reimbursed depends on your own insurance - otherwise it will cost 2,000 euros per month - and they want to shove him in a home for medically needy people and charge 3,000 euros for 6 weeks Wouldn't you have thought that the medcal/nursing part would be covered by CPAM and the physio/rehab by your insurance. Seems ****-eyed to me. But what do I know ? I have a meeting, I hope it will be on Wednesday, with the money finding, box ticking, 'social worker'. I have asked to have an interpreter with me because I need to understand very clearly what has and has not been done, and for them to understand I am unhappy about the nursing home and would like to insist on the rehab/physio centre. But there are some serious questions to be asked - and snwered - here I think, and need to be sure of my legal rights. Sorry this was such a missive - but it's a complicated situation. The more other members understand about what's happened the more information I'm likely to receive. But very many thanks for reading, and offering advice. Doing battle tomorrow morning on his behalf - again !! Chessie

Going from bad to worse. Having fallen out of his hospital bed and broken his hip bone, OH has had an op to repair it. Two screws through top of femur. Due to the drugs (sedation), I haven't been able to have a close look at him. I did so on Friday. He has broken two of his natural lower jaw front teeth. They have sheared off at the gum line, and look painful, and messy - but no longer bleeding. Because of this gap in his teeth, he dribbles a bit, is unable to drink properly, and his speech is not as clear as normal. He has been strapped into his bed, or strapped into a chair. He has received little physiotherapy, despite the op on Monday - he has been confined - to lying in bed, or sitting; he has not been allowed to walk, aided, to the toilet. It has been recommended that he go into a nursing home for 6 weeks 'rehab' - in a b---y nursing home - rather than having proper physio in rehab......... I couldn't find the surgeon to ask him about the op, or to see his x-rays - nothing, just usual bland reassurance from nursing staff that '..the op went very well'. But the hospital were quick to send a social worker wanting all our financial details to ensure we could pay for his nursing care; forget the medical side - get the money details....... scream, scream, scream............... That's one problem I'm facing - he needs rehab - not nursing. He's been fit, healthy and active and has no medical problems. But I need to ensure he receives some kind of dental treatment for the two teeth that he has lost, when he fell , in hospital, from his hospital bed. Can I ask that he has an x-ray on his jaw - he has his moth open most of the time - which is not normal for him, and he has talked about it hurting to eat. What are my rights in insisting that his jaw is x-rayed ? This is a very important point - What rights do I have in asking for further tests ? Do I have any - or is it a case of 'the doctor knows best' - when I know from previous personal experience that they do not. I have checked the consultants at the Villeneuve hospital - there are no dental departments. How can I ensure that his gum injury is treated before he is discharged from hospital. He needs dental care - how can I ensure he receives it. Any advice please ? I am very concerned about his treatment; he was being given a drug for an illness he does not have, has never been tested for, and has never been diagnosed. One seizure, after a concussion, has become - after an emergency trip in the ambulance to '....he's epileptic, let's give him drugs for epilepsy......' That's malpractice - and I am not letting this go. But dental advice first please - anyone have any ideas how I can arrange this ? Thank you for the big shoulders - Chessie

I take out cash from the ATMs from time to time; usually fairly large amount and then use as needed. But it sometimes feels 'awkward' handing over a 50 euro note for a fairly small purchase. Last week I used an express automaated check-out in our local supermarket - first time here in France. Didn't use before now because I thought one needed one of the supermarkets' loyalty cards. Or credit card - but silly to use UK credit card for small purchases. I have discovered that I was wrong (unheard of !!). I needed a tube of toothpaste and a toothbrush - and there were long queues at checkout. Went to customer services trying to 'jump the queue' in an attempt to pay for items at that counter. No luck - was told to use express check-out. So thought I'd go and look. Worked out what to do, with help from assistant, and paid for 2 small items costing just over 10 euros, put in my 50 euro note - and received in change - several small denomination notes - and cash....... Bingo - I've discovered how to get large notes exchanged, how to have several 2 euro coins (for tips for delivery drivers etc) - all very easy. Cross with myself for not thinking of this - or trying - before now. Don't like express checkouts, prefer to have a bit of a chat with real person at the till - but if I need large notes changing in future - then will remember this 'trick'. Chessie

Thanks to those who sent private messages - I've seen them, but damned if I can work out how to reply. But very many thanks - really appreciated the help and support, from everyone, private and on here. It's why I love this forum and the posters here ? Apart from the support, the practical information is always useful for others to remember - as in progress re GenA, and other posters' personal experiences. His op went fine; I did ask for Sed/Ep rather than GenA, unless medically contra-indicated, and the Anaesthetist agreed - but not yet found out what they did. Hope to talk to his consultant tomorrow to find out next stage. But again, very many thanks - love the big shoulders and support - you're all wonderful virtual friends ? Chessie

Rigger - thank you for the info; it is something I had also considered. I know that the sedate/epi route is not 'normal' here in France. I ran into similar problem when OH had to go through paperwork prior to his prostate op. There was a degree of resistance to my request for the S/E route - but they did agree to do the op with S/Ep. This time, because of the weekend, and the holiday - I am unable to find anyone to really talk to about this. Am beginning to feel maybe I should row back on the idea, and leave it to the medics - even though I'm deeply worried about a GenA. Because he fell in hospital, out of his bed and found on the floor, it is possible that more damage was done to his hip bone putting him back into bed because the staff would not have been aware at the time that he had broken his hip in the fall. I don't know how easy it is to do further damage to a broken hip bone by being moved after having broken it. Oh dear, I'm getting into a state again.........!! Chessie PS - SSomon - interesting tip; maybe should be posted in Techno section as well, but good advice for us all.

D Lister - thank you for your lovely pm; I did manage to read it in the end - but now I can't work out how to reply !! Martin - 963 - thanks for those supportive words - love the support that we get on this forum - kind words go a long way, don't they. Riggers - thank you also for your comments above. I found them to be immensely reassuring; I know I had become very distressed and upset at what had happened to OH - in hospital for heaven's sake. But you have also helped me 'pick myself up' !! The plan is that OH has operation on Monday. I asked the staff today if they knew what time - but it's a Saturday, and there didn't appear to be a Dr available when I asked if I could speak to one. Here's the big problem; hospital visit tomorrow - Sunday - no guarantee I'll see a Doctor. Operation on Monday. How do I ensure the op is carried out with sedation and epi - at 'patient's rep' request. I can talk to the nurses but I'm not sure how much weight my verbal message would carry. If I type out a note requesting the op is sedate/epi, sign it - and ask that it be handed to the Dr on Monday morning, or included with OP's notes - anyone know if that would guarantee the surgeon got the message ? Why do I do this to myself ? Chessie

Thanks for replies. It is possible to have hip surgery under sedation rather than GenA - with epidural. My concern is that this is a 'repair' emergency type operation, rather than the care and planning that takes place for a major hip replacement; and yes, hip replacements can be done under sedation. I know, surprising isn't it - but read the medical articles - in fact patients recover much better after having an op under sedation rather than the full GenA. Which is why I'm so worried about the GenA aspect of this whole wretched mess. D Lister - thank you for taking the time to send me a private pm; sadly I cannot 'read' your pm - don't know what the problem is, but maybe someone can tell me how to 'read' a private message. Always could do so in the past - but not now !! Chessie