Furry Knickers Posted May 11, 2006 Share Posted May 11, 2006 Well I had a terrible time in that Isle of Wight!After I picked the winning Plough owned by Peter Holbrook, There was a terrible ruction caused by Dave Holbrook (one of the losers) he said "what right had I to be judgeing their ploughs as I was a grockel" Then old Basil Holbrook (the head ploughman) looked at me in a funny way "are you Furry Holbrook" he asked me "I am Furry O'Toole from County Kildare" I said to him. He seemed fairly normal and started chatting about the island ways and told me about all the insects that went on in the days before the boat was invented. Then I realised why everyone on the Isle Of Wight was called Holbrooks! I also realised that is why they are all a bit quare as a result of all that interloping with each other. He told me that all the lads on the island were being used as guinea pigs for the new nose viagra too. I persueded Basil to come back to England with me to be a gift to Mrs Tresco, and he brought his lunch for Mrs Animal too! On the boat coming back I was reading me Dinosaur Fun Book from Dinosaur World in Sandown, and Basil was mooching around his lunchbox, when the engines stopped on the boat. We were well out in the Solent by now too! I read every page of me Dinosaur book and was halfway through reading The Incredible World Of Pugs when I realised we were drifting out of control! The captain made them close up the canteen to ration the food and drinks, I thought that was a bad sign! After 3 days of Ginsters pasties and wild fudge I started to elucidate! I saw a green striped dolphin wearing a Hawian shirt singing Rock me Hula (I would love for that to have been real though) Later that day I saw a ship, and what a ship, it was the Queen Mary 2! "I am just elucidating again" I thought to meself after eating a bag of fizzy flying saucers I found in me emergency pillow case that I always carry in me car whenever I go over 5 miles from Upper Beagle. I imagined The QM2 threw us a line and towed us back to England, only I was not imagining it atall atall! it really was the Queen Mary 2 towing us to Southampton, we were saved! That is why there has been a delay in getting Basil over to you Mrs Tresco, I hope you now understand and won't harm me. I am left very scarred, and I am now even afraid to go out in me little sailing dinky on the canal. [kiss] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tresco Posted May 11, 2006 Share Posted May 11, 2006 Dear Mr F Nix. I can't believe you went to all that trouble to get Basil back to me. [:)]Is Basil a traditional IOW name? I hope Basil wasn't part of the 'Nose Viagra' progrom, I like a natural Ploughaman without fancy additional powers.I would never harm you Mr Nix. I think most people here know I have a certain affection for you, despite the delay in delivering Basil, and what with you writing that poem for, and then running off with Mrs Animal Lover a couple of weeks ago[;-)]Elucidating is no bad thing, as long as the people you are elucidating with are on the same wavelength [:-))][kiss][kiss][kiss] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Furry Knickers Posted May 12, 2006 Author Share Posted May 12, 2006 I do hope you enjoy your new Ploughman, Mrs Tresco! He needs to be carefully unwrapped without using scissors, I have removed the contents from his lunch box for Mrs Animal (I hope you don't mind) and he needs to be left at room temprature overnight before being used. He is the deluxe version with mystery bump 'n' go actions, so I am sure you will have many hours of fun with him everyday! Nothing is ever too much trouble for you, and thank you so much for the lovely rambling rose which I have named after you. [kiss] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tresco Posted May 12, 2006 Share Posted May 12, 2006 [quote user="FurryKnickers"]...thank you so much for the lovely rambling rose which I have named after you. [kiss][/quote][:D]Why, thank you kindly Mr Nix. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine Animal Posted May 12, 2006 Share Posted May 12, 2006 So now we know about the delay Mrs. Tresco and I didn't even know there had been a delay as I was cut off. I have been very worried about my Ploughman's lunch and what would happen to it, now I just hope it is not too full of viagra (my inbox is!).So all is explained, thank you FK and please therefore ignore my post under the shabby chic.But where am I, Off Topic Forum, The Lounge... [8-)] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Furry Knickers Posted May 12, 2006 Author Share Posted May 12, 2006 I could not ignore you Mrs Animal!I really thought you had been abducted by aliens from the Outer Hebrides or gone off to Gretna Green with Burt!It was really awfull being marooned in uncharted waters with all them wild fish leaping into the boat and nibbling the passengers. I noticed a large Sea Basset licking his lips before he hurled himself onto the deck, It was the first time I ever saw a fish tongue! I ran back inside and sat for several hours pondering about the life of a fish. I then wondered if that Sea Basset with the tongue might be able to speak? I will never know now! Anyway, now we have a lounge to put me settee in![kiss] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tresco Posted May 12, 2006 Share Posted May 12, 2006 But Nixxy, your settee is so pristine, (except for the saggy bit)and we will spill red stuff all over it.[:'(]My ploughman has proved useful. We are currently using him to prop up the barn roof. Thank you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Katie Posted May 12, 2006 Share Posted May 12, 2006 What have you done about his mystery bump n go actions? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tresco Posted May 12, 2006 Share Posted May 12, 2006 They proved useful too. We use them to mix up plant feeding materials. I'll say no more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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