Humanist Celebrant needed

[val douest]

Our daughter plans to be married in about 18 months time, with the legal bits possibly being done in the UK but all the main celebrations in France. She would like to have some kind of short humanist ceremony (in English), exchange of rings etc before the party starts. I have contacted the British Humanist Association who can give me the names of Celebrants prepared to travel abroad but it would obviusly be easier and more cost effective if we could contact someone already living in France. If anyone has any names or ideas I would be very grateful. I know the ceremony has no legal significance and that anyone can conduct it but we would prefer an experienced stranger to a friend or family member.

Val

Also posted in the South West France section to cover all bases.

[Dick Smith]

I don't think an ordained priest would conduct a humanist celebration, a bit like asking a rabbi to conduct a Hindu wedding...

You may have to go the importation route for a celebrant, they are few and far between in the UK, let alone France. Is there a French Humanist association? I considered doing it a few years ago, but didn't enjoy the funerals idea (lots of people do weddings, relatively few do the other end) and it really has to wait until I retire.

Good luck - the ceremony can be very joyous.

[Richard-R]

"Well I think that example is a little extreme. I am sure there are priests who will conduct a wedding that isn't too overloaded with religion and maybe that would do instead. Perhaps a service similar to a C of E blessing."

What kind of priest would that be?? A de-frocked one maybe?

[Coco]

Hi Val

Where is the wedding going to be?  My old boss does both weddings and funerals!  He lives in central London but has a holiday home near Beziers in Herault.  I know he'd love the opportunity to "do" a wedding in France.

[Dick Smith]

What happened? I was away for a couple of days and there seem to be posts missing! Did I miss something interesting?

[chocccie]

Isn't the whole point of wanting a humanist wedding that it isn't done by a priest or be "something like a C of E" service.

Might consider this option myself, as getting married in France (as a foreigner) seems to be one long hassle (if, like me, you don't want to spend the next two years arranging it!).

would be interested to hear if you find anybody in France.

Good luck. 

[Dick Smith]

Yes - that was the point of mine and Richard's posts when a C of E priest was recommended. Most Humanists would be gently insulted by that, and presumably the missing posts refer to the person who didn't realise that.

Not too insulted, though. Back in the nineteenth century when Humanism was becoming popular most schools, public halls etc. would not allow them to meet in their premises - they were atheistic heathens, you see. Except for the Quakers who offered their meeting houses - they fundamentally disagreed with the Humanists but also believed that they had every right to explore their spirituality in any way they wished (within reason, of course).

Good people, Quakers.

[Clarkkent]

Why have any kind of officiant anyway?

Contrary to most peoples' understanding, the celebrants at ANY wedding are the bride and groom - not the priest, minister or whatever.

Why doesn't this (presumably happy) couple just seize the opportunity to celebrate (that word again) their union in a manner to suit themselves and do it their own way?

Why don't they design their own ceremony where they are in charge? They are humanists - they should see no need for an officiant representing some established opinion or philosophy which is not their own.

One of the glories of the National Gallery in London is the wonderful portrait of Giovanni Arnolfini and his bride celebrating their marriage in the privacy of their home before their witness, the painter Jan van Eyck. There is no priest or officiant.

[dave and aileen]

[quote]Isn't the whole point of wanting a humanist wedding that it isn't done by a priest or be "something like a C of E" service. Might consider this option myself, as getting married in France (as a forei...[/quote]

My son and his fiance organised their wedding here, which is to be next June, in about a week. Thats the Mairie, the Church, reception, caterers, invites etc. They are only here for a few weeks at a time as they work for a shipping company, but there was certainly no hastle, everyone in the village is thrilled to bits.

Aileen

[Lilac]

If you come up with a blank for a humanist celebrant, you could try the unitarian fellowship. Their main website in France is www.uufp.info  (in English,) they have other branches and connections throughout France. Many members are humanists and they will adapt a wedding ceremony individually to the beliefs and needs of each couple.

Best wishes,

Lilac

[Dick Smith]

I think we are talking about Humanists, not humanists. Unitarians are religious, that is they believe in a god. Humanists don't. A humanist believes that people are basically good, a Humanist believes that there is no god and that a god is not necessary for spiritual growth and development. How well would a Humanist sit within Unitarian principles if the existence of a god is denied?

[Lilac]

unitarians don't generally believe in a 'god', otherwise what would be the point, they could join any mainstream religion. I am an atheist unitarian, there are many others. It's a belief in the innate goodness of humans and the connection between us. Most unitarians are non-theist, as are many quakers. I would say the difference between me being atheist/humanist and being atheist/humanist/unitarian, is the opportunity to meet on a weekly basis people who are concerned with disadvantaged persons the world over, the environment, refugees, street children, the effects of war, etc etc. Round here there is a dearth of humanist groups and those that exist are unfortunately getting sucked in to some philosophical black hole of school transport for catholics. Yes that's wrong, but I want a bigger picture.

Lilac

 

[Dick Smith]

Not all unitarians share your views; this is the statement of philosophy from the main British website:

The Unitarian movement arose and evolved in the Christian tradition. Today, most Unitarians in Britain are happy to acknowledge this living relationship in some way. Many are glad to call themselves Free or liberal Christians.

It is recognised, though, that there are many people who find difficulty with the Jewish-Christian tradition. Unitarians are concerned to provide fellowship and worship which, while respecting the liberal Christian tradition, will have meaning for them too. Among Unitarians, there are those who find the focus of their faith elsewhere than in liberal Christianity, for example in religious humanism or Creation Spirituality.

Looks religious to me...