letrangere

A lot of people use loo roll for other purposes as well as the obvious.  In place of tissues, as substitutes for J cloths, mopping up spills, taking off makeup, the list is endless. 

Gay, the speech you refer to is indeed memorable.  Paraphrasing I think he suggested that racial integration was not necessarily a good thing and that it was inevitable, almost acceptable, that different cultural and ethnic groups would live apart.  Correct me if I'm wrong someone.  Oddly, the only person I know who has previously put forward this viewpoint, powerfully and almost convincingly, is a Christian Lebanese whose family village was ransacked in the civil war of 1975.  His views on Britain, France and other European nations that openly welcome people of diverse cultural backgrounds are unprintable here.  It sounds glib but attempting to understand might go some way to alleviating the threat.  The average Arab man or woman moves to Europe with the sole intention of improving his family's financial position and obtaining better opportunities for his children.  It's only the extremists in the Arab world that get the air time, the vast majority - and that's a lot of people - live peacefully. With a Muslim population of, what, 6m(?) there's no going back for France.  And any government in the future simply has to find a way of ensuring this community doesn't feel excluded. M  

The questions Catalpa raises are fascinating, numerous and not easy to answer.  She(?)'s right, of course, when she says it's basic primeval fear of the dark but be kind to us for genuine darkness isn't something all that many people encounter nowadays, even those living in the country in many parts of Britain.  What I was trying to suggest was that many people tend to think of country life as being idylic and, critically, safe.  Yet there are important elements of country life - such as the total darkness in parts of France, and the night silence - that lead those of us not brought up in this environment to fear it.  Living alone in Paris I loved going to sleep to the sound of cars rumbling over the cobble stone boulevard, it was so comforting.  And would leap out of bed almost with glee when the guys with the high powered hoses came around making more noise than is conceivably possible at 6 in the morning to blast the dog poo off the pavements.  I guess it's all a matter of what we're used to.  I'm trying to get used to the countryside but it's proving more difficult than I imagined.  M

Don't know which threads you are referring to but I beg to disagree.  Having posted here on a subject that's been troubling me for the last ten days I now feel totally liberated, almost a new woman thanks to our members.  I would urge you to take the same approach I've been taking to this Forum for the last four years.  Look for topics that interest you and home in on them.  If they're not up your street, just ignore them. That said, I rather miss the good old (sometimes incredibly rude) slanging matches we used to have around here.  And, dare I say it, i'm here in france... M  

Mind you, having read this thread, I will probably go out tonight and be absolutely petrified!! I'm sure you won't be, Chris, because you fully understand there isn't anything to be afraid of and feel totally at peace in the country environment at night.  I so envy you 'cos I love it during the day and understand entirely where you're coming from when you describe the pleasure of walking out at night alone.  I'm sure it is magical, only wish I shared it. But, oddly, I've found this thread extremely therapeutic and just airing my concern, writing down my fear, talking about it with women who are in the same position has really, really helped.  As I said to someone who kindly PMd me, I'm very keen to give it another go and pretty certain I'll handle it much better next time, perhaps even enjoy it! If someone has any stats for crime against women in rural France that would be additionally interesting.  Now we really do need Pucette for she would have come up with them in a jiffy! M  

Arthur, I must read this, you recommended it before, didn't you?  We've grown very fond of Languedoc wines and were saying recently how much they have improved in the last few years, beyond recognition in fact.  Anyone remember when Sainsbury's Minervois used to be the cheapest French plonk around?  Wasn't it 50p a bottle back in the late 70s?  Anyway, I reluctantly admit widespread improvement may be due to techniques pioneered by the, ahem, Australians but, tant pis, end results are very pleasurable.  M

I see he's now available in translation, there's a review in this week's Speccie of the book Christine quotes, "Possibility of an Island".  "The true heir to the Marquis de Sade" the reviewer, Anita Brookner, begins.  Almost an entire page later, it's pretty clear she loves him.  Think I missed the point for the computer bloke book bored me rigid.  M

I know what you mean, Tourangelle.   For a long time I didn't see any French films at all, I was so annoyed at "Bienvenue au Gite"!    And all the trailers for new films, I found myself thinking - oh look it's him again - and her - oh and there's that other one I saw last week in - and isn't that.... I've often reflected on this.  Similar size population to the UK, much bigger cinema industry (I stand corrected?), yet the same often old faces popping up all the time.  Personally I find it quite comforting but familiarity does also breed contempt.  Loved all the films Gill mentions.  Was anyone brave enough to see "Innocence"? M

I started writing a long spiel in reply to SB's comment, "as much as one needs" but ended up agreeing with her! What made me post was the discovery that a dear friend of mine speaks very acceptable French, although she swears blind that she doesn't.  And on the otherhand encountering a chap who boldly claimed he "spoke French" yet couldn't follow a very simple conversation when I introduced him to a French friend.  So what measure can we use, O level, A level, beyond? M  

Dick, did you eventually receive your copy?  Mine was in the post box when I arrived home from holiday.  And very nice it is too, I'm going to guard it this time.  M

as for when to drink wine, remember "the sun is always somewhere over the yardarm somewhere in the empire ". Absolutely, but never before sundown?  Which isn't very practical in Europe in the summer so we always say 5 o'clock, can't drink during the day anymore, it kills me.  I love a kir as an apero, preferably 2 or 3.  Or even better a kir royale using cheap bog standard bubbly.  And I almost cannot cook without a glass in my hand, the two definitely go together.  Regular days we'll drink the same wine before as we would with the meal.  When we're entertaining we'd discriminate.  Someone mentions new world wines?  Ugh, I often feel I'm waging a one woman war against them.  But the worst part is, the best value for money French or, especially, Italian wines are not so readily available in Britain, so it's the Aussies and various others that now dominate the cheaper end of the market.  M

My goodness I was thinking of Pucette so often.  I've tried the positive thought approach.  I've tried reasoning for I'd like to think I'm a fairly intelligent person.  But I'm still convinced that not just one but every psychopath and rapist for a 100 km is lying in wait until they see the last light go off.  And that they know I'm there alone, as people do in the country.   People talk, you're watched.  So I never turn all the lights off.  Slept on the sofa downstairs fully dressed one night as I felt "safer" there.  Reasoned that if they were going to break in, at least I'd hear them, have a head start on making my escape.  When I did eventually find the courage to sleep upstairs, kept all the hall lights on and a small crow bar on the bedside table.  Envy TU's friend with her gun.  What I don't like is the idea of someone possibly breaking in and creeping around first, biding their time until they pounce.  (I really feel as though I'm in the psychiatrist's chair here!)  Ultimately discovered the only way to sleep was to take one of my "fear of flying" pills on top of some wine.  A girlfriend who lived in the Niger Delta once told me that when hubbie was away she did this so that at least if someone did break in and attack her, she'd be completely out of it.  I know that if it had been my own house I would have installed an alarm and also those heat sensitive outside lights that come on automatically, though they'd be a pain as they'd probably pick up nocturnal wild animals, certainly boar, which visit regularly.  I would also have a dog, possibly two.  I'm sure I would, in time, get used to it, possibly even grow to enjoy it.  I'm used to being on my own, travelled all over the world alone and certainly don't have a problem handling men.  I work in the Middle East and can't believe French artisans can be any more difficult to handle than Saudis! But it's the quiet and almost claustrophobic darkness of the country that troubles me when I'm alone.  It's like being smothered in a heavy blanket.  As you can't see what's around you, you don't know what's there.  And it's that that really gets me. M

I know we've talked about women on their own in France, the problems of going out for a drink on our own and how every farm hand for miles probably assumes we're looking for company.  But may I ask a simple question, how many ladies actually feel comfortable alone on their own in the country? I'm fine on the Metro late at night and will happily walk home along deserted Paris streets (at least in the better neighbourhoods) in the early hours.  But come nightfall in the country, I have the shutters closed and the kitchen door locked and would curl up and die if you suggested I walked 500m down the lane in the dark. Any other ladies feel the same or I am simply a paranoid townie? M

But I did find them interesting, SB, they fascinated me.  And although I am having a laugh at their expense here, can't deny that (and I do feel a twinge of guilt), without sounding too patronising I actually felt a bit sorry for them for they're clearly unhappy and with winter around the corner surely it's only going to get worse?  They live in a typical holiday home village that is already a ghost town and although there are some permanent resident Brits, they're a pretty cliquey lot, been there for yonks, "well integrated" and rather aloof when it comes to new arrivals, etc.  The couple in question have a lovely house but they paid a lot of money for it, sold up in UK, etc. so possibly (tho' I don't know their financial situation) would struggle if they had to move back.  Someone earlier on says that many people today view moving to France as no different to moving from one town to another in the south of England and I agree, that really does appear to be the case.  The media has possibly been responsible for this but also the world has got smaller, we are all so much more mobile.  Perhaps too people have, at least outwardly, acquired more confidence with foreign travel and foreign things?  Or do they think that many parts of Europe are just little outposts of England?  M

Came across an interesting couple at a drinks party, early 60s, early retirement, they moved permanently to the Lot in May.  Lost the rose tinted specs pretty quickly though and are already having a moan.  Feel they paid too much for their house, should have looked around more.  (Canny British neighbours suspect they are right.)  Don't like the French, they're "a miserable lot".  And, surprise, surprise for rural France, "they're all farmers"!  Well, they're not actually, one works in a bank, another is a teacher but as this couple don't speak a word of French, they'll probably never discover that.  On the subject of learning the language, here's their response: "There are so many Brits in this area, we didn't think it would be necessary."    Other gripes include "miss the shops" and the familiar French shop opening times, "they're always closing just as we arrive".   Plus "We have to get the car out for everything".  And distance they have to drive to shops (4 km for bread, 12 km for basic store, 26 km for Carrefour).  You would have thought they'd figured that out before they even signed a compromis.  She doesn't drive, incidentally... Best of all though, and I loved this bit, "It's over two hours' drive to the nearest IKEA!"  That's a classic, surely?  Perhaps they should have moved to Neasden?   All they wanted were beds yet pointing out that these can be purchased quite readily from an array of stores at nearby Cahors fell on deaf ears.  Ikea it has to be. Couldn't help thinking how they should have done some homework, and what a shame they didn't discover this Forum.  Sudden thought: hope to goodness they don't find it now!!! M

Better than where?  Surely it all depends upon where/how you live at present and where/how you live in France?   This "craze" in Britain for moving to France continues almost unabated yet it is so interesting house hunting in France at present and talking to Brits trying to sell up.  So many have seen that the life they dreamt of is far from what it was cracked up to be (or projected on the tele).  And even those who only retained holiday homes are bored with vacationing in the same place each year and/or disappointed with dwindling rental revenue.  I think it's very easy and possibly quite natural to think the grass may be a bit greener elsewhere.  But in their rush to find out, a lot of people are getting stung. M

I mean REALLY speak French?  And how do you define "speaking French", for isn't it so subjective?  Some people are so modest about their linguistic capabilities whereas others will give the impression they are fluent when in reality they can barely order a baguette.   Yet they are, technically, "speaking French".  It's a curious point.  M

I hate to shatter all your dreams but have you heard her talking about herself and her life recently? Absolutely, only last Saturday on TV5, this is what I was referring to.  She struck me as being perfectly normal, rather diffident and ever so slightly ill at ease on camera but confident of her own personal opinions, and charmed by the warmth of the audience that was invited to ask questions, many of which were quite probing.  She looked so relieved when her ordeal was over.  I thought she was delightful.  M

Chirac...He is the only Frenchman that you do not have to say "Parlez plus lentement pour moi s'il vous plait" Quite agree.  I've always thought he has a nice speaking voice.  But Dominique dV has an even nicer accent.  Would love to hear him reading some of his poems. Are we only allowed one?  Can't we have several? Two more I'd love to meet are both known by their initials and both desperately attractive (at least to girls of my age): journalist, writer and womaniser, PPDA and writer/ philosophe, BHL.  Probably top of the list though is actor and reason I paid attention in French when at school, Jean-Pierre Leaud.  And last but certainly not least, the man who directed him in so many magnificent films, the late Francois Truffaut... M  

the Hotel Dieu in Beaune Yes, odd that wasn't included and SB's Pont de Gard.  In fact, especially the latter as it's within striking distance of the included Avignon.  Glad other people agree with me about French ski resorts, forgot to mention Megeve.  ARE there any that survive free of sprawling apartment blocks?  I would remove Lourdes too, and I say that as a croyante. Vence is described as "unpretentious" and we're told we must go and see the Matisse Chapel.  (I dented the bumper of a hire car attempting to park outside this wretched place so was in no mood to enjoy the stain glass window when I eventually got inside!)  Neither the wonderful Maeght collection nor St Paul gets a mention, which is strange.  Personally, I like SPdV, though I'd only visit out of season. the bay of Dournazez (sp) in Brittany Gay, Douarnenez, my parents honeymooned here and we went back a couple of times for family holidays.  Stunningly beautiful. The book is a US publication, reading the forward I see it took the editor 7 years to compile.  (What a fabulous job!)  It is quite a personal and sometimes quirky collection, but she's really done her homework.  Recommends the old town of Jeddah, for example, and a very remote village in Yemen, way off even the most intrepid tourist's path. We were talking about Robert Louis Stevenson's travels with his donkey through the Cevennes recently.  Well, did you know he lived for a time on the island of Apia in Western Samoa and that we can visit his house today?  Yet another of the 1000 places to see.  Makes you realise life is way too short... M

I bet that each British-owned blue shuttered barn conversion in Aquitaine has an LP of hers waiting for the record player to be mended What a beautiful image.  May I add the suggestion that the blue paint is peeling? Even more authentic. Can't beat CDs for quality but there's some music that actually sounds better on black vinyl.  Early opera recordings, scratchy jazz and I'd imagine Francoise Hardy.  Though for me in my youth I hear her on a juke box. And I can see myself scrounging centimes off my parents to put into the machine.    M

Historically, in a fast moving market if you were a cash buyer you had a better chance of getting the house you want as the seller may be more interested in selling to you than to someone who had to fiddle around getting a mortgage in place.  I've heard (though have no first hand evidence) that cash buyers are sometimes able to negotiate a better deal for similar reasons. M

Thought this would prompt an interesting dialogue.  I couldn't understand inclusion of Courcheval and Chamonix.  Been yonks since I was last in either but even then they were both over developed and hardly the picturesque little Alpine villages with big mountain views that you can still find (just) in Switzerland and Austria.   Checking in the Blue Guide, Eugenie-les-Bains is in the Landes just south of Aire s Ardour.  Established in 1861, "a green oasis on edge of the desert of the Landes."  As someone else explained, Empress Eugenie sheltered there during a storm in 1859.  Famous as both premier village minceur de France AND a centre of gastronomy!  Spa waters treat obesity whilst Michel Guerard of cuisine minceur fame has some restaurants there.  Ah, that's possibly why it was included.   M 

Taken from a fascinating book, "1,000 places to see before you die", one that I'm sure would inspire wanderlust in even the most die hard stay-at-home.  What interests me is that the French list goes beyond the normal popular mass tourist destinations.  Here are a few, actually quite a few:- Biarritz The Dordogne and the Cave of Lascaux Eugenie les Bains, Aquitaine (anyone know this?) St Emilion (absolutely) Musee d'Unterlinden and the wine road of Alsace Cathedrale Notre Dame de Strasbourg Vezelay and l'Esperance (Burgundy) Giverny Mont-Saint-Michel Normandy's D Day Beaches Paris (of course) Cathedrale Notre Dame de Chartres Chateau de Versailles The Carmague Toulouse-Lautrec Museum, Albi (a surprising inclusion IMHO) The Walls of Carcassonne Place Stanislas, Nancy Lourdes Loire Valley Ile de Re (that's on my particular "must see" list) Aix en Provence Antibes Amphitheatre at Arles Avignon Eze Les Baux de Provence Mougins Vieux Nice St Tropez Vence Annecy and Talloires (absolutely) Chamonix Courcheval Vieux Lyons Megeve   M  

And how about flat Pepsi to clean the loo?  And presumably harmless to the fosse?  M