TWINKLE Posted March 10, 2008 Share Posted March 10, 2008 hand [;-)]with his French homework.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jamesdee Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 because he needs to know the french for sporran so that he can ......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pads Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 find a good recipe to cook it with some cheesy mash and a drop of the old...................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrCanary Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 ..........Scotch. Eventually, the recipe was found and the dish prepared - but the sporran looked anything but appetising. Rubbing his chin with one hand and scratching his................ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pads Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 Sporran with the other he found a gold nugget within. He knew just what to do with it , he would .................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cowoman Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 roll it out flat,toss it a couple of times in the air ,say a few hail marys then shape it to make a new type of dish called a scotsmans crepe.He knew that the French had never tried such an exotic dish before.Pleased with the end result he ....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
inkflo Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 grabbed a bottle of scotch whisky & the Scotsman's crepe & dashed over to his French neighbour Claude who was sitting on a tree stump staring at his Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pads Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 Big toe because he had noticed that it had started to .................. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oliveau Posted March 12, 2008 Author Share Posted March 12, 2008 ...rain.Enid Truscott gently fondled her.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geordie girl Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 ............knees while quietly humming to herself a lullaby of yesterday that her daddy used to sing to her in the night when she couldn`t sleep. Madame pompodour didn`t.............. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cowoman Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 know the words so she didn't even try to mime.Singing wasn't her claim to fame,it was........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suzy Posted March 13, 2008 Share Posted March 13, 2008 being a champion arm wrestler, she had even been champion at her brother's school and her biceps were a joy to behold, although it did mean she had difficulty finding.................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrCanary Posted March 13, 2008 Share Posted March 13, 2008 .......all the parts of her anatomy that the rest of us take for granted! "I hope you are not insinuating I am a woman of loose morals?" she exclaimed when reading this post, "You keep your hands on your own anatomy and off mine!" With that, and her face looking like thunder, she grabbed a ............................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oliveau Posted March 13, 2008 Author Share Posted March 13, 2008 ....Waitrose Melton Mowbray pork pie which was lying abandoned in the gutter and tossed it through the Mairie window - fortunately open at the time - while screaming ".............. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geordie girl Posted March 13, 2008 Share Posted March 13, 2008 .............obscenities at a passing dog who had decided to use her handbag,which she had laid on the ground in order to throw the pie, as a toilet. Feeling as angry as a mad horse she turned .......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pads Posted March 13, 2008 Share Posted March 13, 2008 a nice shade of puce and marched off in the direction of ............. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oliveau Posted March 14, 2008 Author Share Posted March 14, 2008 .........Stade de France, where Condom were playing Nice in the National Tiddley-Winks final.Meanwhile, Yvette Camembert was off to the livestock market because Mlle Roture, the milliner, had suggested the purchase of a a rabbit to satisfy her urges....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitty Posted March 14, 2008 Share Posted March 14, 2008 Sadly there were no goats to be found so she decided to .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frenchie Posted March 14, 2008 Share Posted March 14, 2008 buy an inflatable one ! But Mr chevalier, whom she met, told her ..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrCanary Posted March 14, 2008 Share Posted March 14, 2008 "You must be very careful with those inflatable things, (hilarious naughty joke omitted at this point) quite often when you least expect it, they........... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oliveau Posted March 15, 2008 Author Share Posted March 15, 2008 ......let you down, or to be more exact they let themselves down, Heh Heh!"Yvette stamped her foot in petulance, " You stupid old man, if I have something inflatable it will get stuck half way up my chimney. What I really need is something that will......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrCanary Posted March 15, 2008 Share Posted March 15, 2008 ......cook for me, treat me like a princess, shower me with gifts, and, whenever I demand it, give me a good.......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cowoman Posted March 15, 2008 Share Posted March 15, 2008 nights sleep,without interuption.Just the thought of this made her very......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrCanary Posted March 15, 2008 Share Posted March 15, 2008 ......tired, so she went to bed. The next morning, she was awoken by a cock-a-doodle-do, she opened the window and pushed back the volets, allowing the sun to stream in. Amazingly, as she looked down from her bedroom in the grenier, ...............................(Oops! Sorry! Perhaps it was a chicken-a-doodle-do ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oliveau Posted March 16, 2008 Author Share Posted March 16, 2008 ....she saw that standing in her garden was none other than Gaston Guillemot, her childhood sweetheart, holding in one hand a big red cock, and in the other a................. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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