English Friends

[letrangere]

Isn't this supposed "bond" between fellow Brits abroad interesting? Why is it we're all supposed to automatically become friends when living in France despite the fact that all we possibly have in common is the same passport and mother tongue?

And why it is that when so many Brits move to France the first thing they do after a finding house is worry about finding English friends? If English speaking friends are so terribly important why leave Britain in the first place?

Margaret

[Mistral]

Margaret, I have lived in france for the last 13 years and have the grand total of NO English friends. It didn't bother me at first. I neither looked for them nor avoided them. But as the years have gone on I have started missing them. I would love to be able to chat with someone in my first language, to be able to talk about things that only another English person would understand.
I live in a totally French environment and sometimes I feel like I'm either having to supress the English part of me or excuse it. (OK, only on the bad days) Once my children were born I was more aware of it. Having to explain for the umpteenth time why I didn't put them in shoes at 6 months gets boring.

I agree that having the same passport and language as someone else probably isn't the best basis for a long lasting friendship, but it does give you one thing in common

[Mpprh]

Hi

and why do so many leave UK and move to a Brit ghetto in France ?

Peter

http://tlp.netfirms.com

[Chouette]

Hope you won't 'flame' me, but I can't help feeling rather peeved by your post. I totally agree that if one chooses to emigrate to another country then one should make the effort to learn the language and integrate etc., etc., but at the same time what's wrong with wanting to have both French and English friends? Unless you are able to speak French totally fluently interactions with the French are always going to be a challenge and frankly hard work sometimes. Plus you haven't got the shared history, culture and sense of humour that you have with people of your own race and it's natural to want to have a good ol'natter with people every now and again. As for people trying to hook up with other English the moment they arrive, again maybe it's because their French is only at a very elementary stage and in order to settle in and find their feet they would gain comfort from finding others of the same nationality who have already made the move, are integrated and who can offer them valuable advice and support during their move to a new country, which is for most people the biggest step they will ever take in their lives.

I don't think it's fair to look down one's nose at people just because they have chosen a different way of settling in to a new country than you might have done. You can never be French, so why try to deny your Englishness? Just a thought.

[Redredwine]

LAST EDITED ON 03-Jul-04 AT 05:58 PM (BST)

We select our friends on the premise that if we wouldnt let them over our doorstep in the UK then we dont here either There are some Brits who assume because you are British you will automatically become their best friends.

[Weedon]

I have found it interesting that a lot of responses to this question have been that to have brits as neighbours is a bit of a taboo and it struck me 'how the worm has turned' for I recall in the fifties and sixties that if a black family moved into your street it somehow spelled disaster.

Before the milk monitors pull this posting, I am only making an interesting (to me anyway) sort of comparison.

[Palwing]

I reckon you are after a BIG wooden spoon for Xmas?