Sara

Hello , I don't know whether this bit of information will help any parents who have children about to start college in September this year but I heard that if their children take the subjects German and then afterwards take Latin they will then more likely to have better behaved kids in the class. This apparrently is the only way round the problem as the little ' S***S are not interested in these subjects. Once you are studying for these subjects you are then kept with the same children for 'all' subjects......- Might just be the school here but thought I would share this info ... Sarah

One of the first things that I learnt living here was that if you are pulled over by the gendarmes, never start speaking to them in french as you are more likely to get a fine or they will start asking awkward questions. If they think you can not speak any french they will probably wave you on your way....... A bit naughty I know but oh well..... Sarah

Many thanks both of you- That make sense parsnips... Sarah...

I have just been to the notaires to make an appointment to see the notaire . I asked for the price of how much it would cost for a document to be drawn up for a 'donation entre epoux' the friendly receptionist seemed to know the price immediately and said that she was sure it was Euros 109.00 . She then phoned a notaire to double check and mentioned that I was english. The price then went up to Euros 320- I am feeling a bit paranoid- Is this a special price for the english??- Does any one know the rough price for this document. I know it will only take about half an hour to draw up. I know that I am extra sensitive at the moment (January blues!)so perhaps she did make a genuine mistake....... Anyone just made a similar will- would you mind sharing how much it cost ?.... Many thanks After paying all the taxes., christmas and bills etc I am hoping the price should be the lower one and then I can find another Notaire.....

Many thanks Clarkkent , will try and contact her on behalf of my friend...

Dear Hoddy many thanks yr comments. I do not know if it is different up in the North of England, that is why I asked the question. I have only lived in the south of England but after the comment of Fi who thought schools apart from Grammar Schools (notice spelling of Grammar - Norman) did not set stream for 'other' lessons it made me wonder if it was different in other parts of the country. Sorry did n't mean to upset anyone, it was just a question.......

Norman - yes - you rumbled me- 'clever you' - I don't know whether you can understand the point that I am trying to raise Norman? Children that do not want to learn and do not try, should not stop the ones that are doing well and therefore should be in a different class with extra help if they need it or want it. I went to the local comprehensive- but even at that school we had sets. I was lucky and I was in all the classes where children wanted to learn and respected the teachers. It must be very worrying if you have a child who could be dyslexic or has learning difficulties . I know of an english lady who has a child (here in France) who is showing all the signs of dyslexia and the school cannot identify that she has this. (I know for a fact she would not disrupt the class she would more likely be sitting quietly)Instead of trying to help her they have held her daughter back twice to redo the school year in exactly the same way as before. She has always struggled but has not received any 'real' help. Her daughter will soon be 11 and she has just been refused entrance to college in September. They believe she needs to go to a special school with children with 'all disabilities'. She has had the dyslexic tests but even the experts here in France can or have not given her a proper diagnosis. Her parents do not know what to do and are now seriously thinking about returning to England where they can find help- Incidentally anyone watch the programme last night on dyslexia BBC1 - ? Fi - I have only heard of England having sets- as I mentioned before I only went to a comprehensive and I was in a set for every subject and to my knowledge this was the same for all the schools in my area at that time. If we return to England I have investgated two 2ndry schools and they use the same system- so sorry If I have misread the situation. Perhaps it is different up in the North of England? Norman - I haven't done a spell check perhaps you could run your eye over the post...........

It's a shame to hear that all school's in France have a system that obviously can not really work that well. Many thanks

Another question that I would like to raise please, as I am' thinking' about going back to the UK for my son's 2ndry education (in 4 yrs time) . I would like to make sure that I understand the french system before rushing back as my hubbie is very keen to stay in France. Anyway I learnt today that if Jac goes to the local 'private' college/lycee there are only 3 classes per year and every class has mixed abilities. Which is the same system for his school at the moment. Whereas I can understand it in CE1, as they're all just starting to learn but at college surely this is madness?! Also surely you are going to get the kids who do not want to learn sitting at the back or just causing trouble. I can see Jac's bullying just continuing....... According to my friend this is exactly what is happening, a boy in her daughters class disrupts the lessons every day until he is suspended for a week he then goes back to lessons and starts causing havoc again.... Is this common in France ? In the public schools is this the same system? It sounds like England in the 1950's. Common sense say's this system cannot work. If you have any experience of this or knowledge could you help me please. Many thanks Sara

Panda many thanks again, will try and send you a pm tomorrow as I have a couple of questions I would like to ask you. Sarah

Many thanks, yet again great advice Cathy.

Many thanks again for your comments Ladoix, the main reason I look at books with Jacques is to learn new words only. I don't give him a direct translation , I ask him what is happening in the story, to see if he understands (I do the google translation mainly for me so that I can understand what is going on before we read the book, sometimes it does not translate properly but I can then get the general gist of the story) It really helps me and I am positive it will enrich his vocabulary. It is just a lot of hard work! I enjoy it though. Sarah

Many thanks for your comments , I think I will start very soon. We have lots of Peter and Jane books from which I always buy when I see them in England (charity shops). For christmas I bought him Leap frog with several books (in English) . He enjoys mucking about with it at the moment. I don't really have a lot of spare time as I am really concentrating on the french. I know I will need to find the time very soon. Also I know it is very important for Jac to play and get exercise!! If only there were more hours in the day!! Jacques like your son is average in the class but he is the youngest, he is only just 7 while 2 of the children in his class have just turned 8, so this is a disadvantage. Perhaps if he is pulled back a year I can then say' he is top of the class. ' Once again many thanks Sarah

Sorry to start another topic but have lived here for nearly ten years and have a few questions now!! I have not started to teach my son to read or write in english as I did not want to confuse him with the phonetics. He is now 7.This is starting to worry me as there is a posibility I will return to England in 4 years time so that he can start his 2ndry education there. (Not impressed by what I have read or heard about the colleges/ lycees .) I try and read a 2 or 3 chapters of a book in English to my son every night , his last book was' Georges marvelous medicine' and I plan to start 'Charlie and the chocolate factory ' tonight. What age does one start this when you are living abroad and also how hard is it to catch up on those lost years? Is it feasable that he could be at the same level as an English child by the time (if) we go back? Sorry if this has already been raised , I did do a search but could n't see anything Sarah

Many thanks for comments, I mainly translate words I know he would not know (common nouns,or tenses he has not learnt ) Other than that he understands the stories. P.S  He has a very good accent. Just read article I am just 'advanced' in the catagory. Which is fair enough as I don't work over here, I am not married to french person and do not 'intergrate' with french village people. The french people I would love to 'intergrete 'with have secondary  homes here and come over only at weekends or holidays. They normally work in Paris or other cities and have travelled widely and when they are back here rather be with their family- fair enough. I have also met 3 lovely  french ladies (same age as me ) similar people all have good jobs but work full time and therefore are busy at weekends. Hence I normally hermit myself away and keep myself busy.

This is only my 2nd posting but this has been a topic that has bugged me for several years. What is fluency ? I have always thought it was to be able to speak the language like a native. However , since living here I have heard and read that people are fluent after 3 months? How can this be ? When my son was 2 and a half he had another little english friend living the other side of town to us and she proudly said that her son ( who was 3 then) was fluent in 'both' languages. I am not a confrontational person so I smiled and said nothing. Over the years I have met similar English people who have said roughly the same thing to me about their children ( who incidentally the parents  can't speak french themselves). I met one chap who did n't know any of the verbs or tenses and would point at everything but his wife would tell everyone he was fluent.  I have to say this turns my stomache and normally I can't be bothered to continue the friendship. I can not stand bragging and definately when it is not true , I prefer down to earth self affacing people (not many of those around ) My son (you probably read my previous posting)  is just 7 and is only just learning to conjuguete his verbs . Surely if you don't know your tenses you cannot understand the language properly . So my son is not fluent yet . He understands most things and can communicate well , I believe he will not be 'fluent' until next year. As I mentioned on my previous posting he is not stupid and for tests which are twice a week he usually gets an 'A'- (acquis). Over the week I - Yes I- spend literally hours translating stories (help with google)so that I can understand them and then to help him for the vocabulary (we have over 200 books from the 'foire a tout') Every Wednesday my son will have one hour in the morning reading with me , going over verbs and spelling and one hour in the afternoon with some maths thrown in . Saturday and Sundays the same- Is this the 'norm' , or am I unusual' ? Today ( At the moment he is watching tv , being Saturday, he will soon get fed up with that and will play with his lego) for example I have put aside 4 books - one book is Moi Je Lis ( he will read 2 chapters) I then repeat it and translate any words into english so that he understands more. He mentioned yesterday that he wanted to look at some books on 'prehistoric days' so I have found 2 books to flick through with him and read - Youpi-  and I have the entire collection of Limagerie for children so we shall look through the one about cavemen etc.... tomorrow will be similar. If the weather is nice we will go out somewhere as well , ( normally a beautiful walk in breathtaking Normandie) As you can see I spend a lot of time and energy on my son and I am rather confused on this subject, he now knows a lot of vocabulary but I know being his mum , he is not fluent yet......... What do you think ?- Please don't shoot me down in flames.[:)] Sarah

Dear Gardengirl like Cathy great advice, much appreciate your comments and support. Sarah

Many thanks Cathy and Paul. Have told Jacques many times not to look upset in class as this will make the bullies feel like that they are winning. I have now told Jacques he really needs to sort this out himself and also mentioned to him to stand up to the main bully. He knows that he will always have our support if he needs it and will always go and speak to teacher/ head mistress if required. The good thing is I don't think Jacques is too intimidated by them, he thinks that they are all idiots!! Sarah

Totally agree with what you said. My husband lost his mother when he was 8 years old he had been off school for 4 weeks. The children had been primed to be nice to him the afternoon before. That first morning playtime 3 little "characters" went up to him and chanted' you don't have a mum'. Myu husband got so angry he hit the main bully on the nose and broke it (similar to you). Jacques started karate in September to give him confidence he has just got his yellow belt. He has not used it on them yet but I feel it will be only a matter of time. Don't really agree with fighting back but if it is the only way to stop the little S***S then let it be......Frankly they don't seem to have the brainpower or parental input to understand much else. My main point remains, however, that I honestly feel the overall bullying situation in France is getting worse. A reflection of the times I feel. Almost like Britain in the 1980's.........arguably. Sarah

Back onto the subject of bullying. Jacques used to eat at school every lunch time until I found out that he was wondering around the playground looking for someone to play with. I now make the 15 minutes trip to pick him up for lunch , he now eats at home and is much happier. He can focus on his morning lesson come home for support and cuddles and then back to school for his lessons. Monday this week I took Jacques back to school 5 mins earlier and watched him secretly at the gate. Jacques found his 'new friend' and were happy running around together, they were joined by his last best friend Almeric (unfortunately the bullies were with Almeric) They were running around playing 'it' (or something similar) I was just starting to feel happier when I witnessed a very upsetting sight. One of the bullies went up to Jacques pushed him away and told him to go!! Then the other bully joined in and I saw him push and then pinch Jacques.- With that I flew into the playground and shouted at them No!! That is not acceptable. You must be kind to each other, I then said the next time I hear you have either punched, kicked etc I will speak to the head mistress. THey both looked sheepish. They have not bothered Jacques since , but it is early days!! That evening I mentioned it to his teacher, who is starting to look bored with the subject. I have also mentioned this bullying to two of the mothers, one of which was the one who pinched him on Monday (she is a very religious lady). Many thanks for all your comments, will keep you posted. To be honest I am finding life hard here. My husband is chronically ill and I get no support from family or friends. (Chronic Illnesses are too boring for people) So I don't check my posts as often as I would like.

Regarding your comment on marking they use as follows: A (acquis,) B (a renforcer) C ( Encours d'acquisation) D non acquis.

The school is a private school ,and is very good regarding his education. We live nr a large town and a lot the children have parents who own/work in the shops.

Many thanks for your reply and suggestion. I have now done this. It doesn't seem to be a unique problem. Far from it. Sadly. I notice, however, that all similar threads are quite old. Has anyone more up to date experience of this unfortunate fact of life? Do people think the problem is getting worse. Having spoken to the teachers at Jac's school they seem to think it is a new problem (last five years) and is getting much worse. Thanks in advance, Sara

We moved to France in 2002, my husband and myself had always been francophiles. My husband who was just 40 then had to stop working due to ill health. We decided to move to Normandy so that we could drive back to England to see his specialist as often as required. In 2003 after years of trying we were blessed in having a baby boy. When he was 3 he started the local private maternal school. Jacques was always a very friendly little boy and always tried to be friends with everyone, despite obviously the language difference at that age. Even at that age I sensed an unfriendliness with some of the children as Jac would wave, smile and say "bonjour" and in return he would just get a' blank face look' back at him. Four years later the children that just used to stare at him or call him names now are developing an alarming tendancy to sometimes kick, punch or call him stupid!! There are 9 boys and 8 girls in his class. Four boys out of the 9 are turning into bullies and are the ones who are calling him names & sometimes push, kick or punch him, 2 call him names etc. and 3 just look at him and ignore him. He used to have a good friend (friend for the last 4 years) but when all the children played together someone would tell Jac 'to go away!!' His friend now plays with Jac's bullies. The girls being girls don't play with boys and either just ignore him or call him names ( rubbish...etc...) Jac is now a quieter little boy and recently has had problems sleeping over this situation. Jac's school work is good and all the teachers have been pleased with him. He is tested twice a week on spelling, maths or verbs and he nearly always gets an A. (So I no he is not stupid !)lI think this annoys the children. The teacher is very supportive I have been keeping her informed since September, but unfortunately the situation seems to be deteriorating further. Last Friday Jac had been kicked in the playground just before lessons the teacher witnessed this. She made him the particular boy say sorry to Jac but in the space of just 1 hour whilst in the local church (for a festive celebration) the same boy & others were kicking Jac from behind and once again calling him names. I told the teacher about this further incident & I am now planning to speak with the head mistress. Jac plucked up the courage, confronted the group of bullies in the playground & made them aware that if his is punched or kicked again his mother will tell the headmistress immediately. This took some courage on his part. Jac has just made a recent & new friend who is in the other class of CE1- I am hoping the bullies do not try and stop this new friendship! I cannot believe this is a local problem confined to just this part of Normandy. I have a suspicion that the bullying is started by certain parents making negative comments about foreigners living here. I believe that where I live they are becomming xenophobic!! A great shame, not my dream of France. Has anyone on this forum experienced anything similar? Sara