Joh Posted January 19, 2005 Share Posted January 19, 2005 Saw this one and fell off my chair, so had to post it,,,, A young man called Peter invited his mother for dinner. During the course ofthe meal his mother couldn't help but notice how handsome Peter's flat matewas.She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, & this onlymadeher more curious. Over the course of the eve, while watching the twointeract, she startedto wonder if there was more between Peter & his flatmate than met the eyeReading his mum's thoughts Peter volunteered "I know what you must bethinkingbut I assure you Simon & I are just flatmates, about a week later Simon cameto Petersaying "ever since you're mother came to dinner I've been unable to find thefrying panyou don't suppose she took it do you?" well I doubt it, but I'll email herjust to be suresaid Peter, so he sat down & wrote :-Dear mother,I'm not saying that you "did" take the frying pan from my house,I,m notsaying that you "did not" take the frying pan, but the fact remains that itis missing ever since you were here for dinner.Love PeterSeveral day's later Peter received an email from his mother which read,Dear son, I,m not saying that you "do" sleep with Simon, & I,m not sayingthat you "do not" sleep with Simon, but the fact remains that if he wassleeping in his own bed, he would have found the frying pan by now!Love mumLesson of the dayDon't ever lie to you're mother (she always always finds Out!) Terry (Not standing in the corner because there are no packing cases in the way) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0BRIAN WOODHEADI,m here in franceddMMyyyy0Falseen-USI,m here in franceTrue Posted January 19, 2005 Share Posted January 19, 2005 Are you saying that peter and his flatmate are a couple of puffs?if so what has that got to do with a french forum? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janey Posted January 20, 2005 Share Posted January 20, 2005 As you,re always saying Outcast..you,re here in France, therfore I take it you read it in France, so there,s the french connection.Made me laugh..here in FranceJaney Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tresco Posted January 20, 2005 Share Posted January 20, 2005 It made me laugh too Janey, but oh, wait a minute, damn, the 'no laughing' light has just been illuminated. tresco Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IAN_S Posted January 20, 2005 Share Posted January 20, 2005 Aren't some people miserable gits? There are not a lot of forums around entitled " Jokes for Brits living in France".I for one miss Swiss Barry's stories and the like, where has he gone I wonder?Keep it up Joh, I need a chuckle now and again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blondie Posted January 20, 2005 Share Posted January 20, 2005 Thanks for that.....it caused a good laugh in our house...any more? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joh Posted January 20, 2005 Author Share Posted January 20, 2005 Plenty more, everything comes to he that waits, agree Swiss Barry has been gone toooooo long. Maybe one day there will be a seperate forum for slightly unsavoury material, like a watershed topic, that may-be totally un-related to "Le Hexagon", for the more mature? and those who are not easily offended and take life with "a pinch of salt". Can't all be Victor Meldrew's can we. Just a thought in one of my sober periods.Terry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0BRIAN WOODHEADI,m here in franceddMMyyyy0Falseen-USI,m here in franceTrue Posted January 20, 2005 Share Posted January 20, 2005 So now that homophobic jokes are allowed on the forum are racist jokes now allowed? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dick Smith Posted January 20, 2005 Share Posted January 20, 2005 Outcast, read this carefully.A joke about homosexuals is not homophobic unless it expresses hatred or contempt or a negative view based solely on sexual orientation.A joke about black (or white, brown or anything in between) people is not racist unless it expresses a negative image or point of view.Stereotyping usually offends.No takers on this particular troll, I hope. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0BRIAN WOODHEADI,m here in franceddMMyyyy0Falseen-USI,m here in franceTrue Posted January 20, 2005 Share Posted January 20, 2005 Would you make a joke about jews being gased in concentration camps(with the 60th annniversary and the 3rd in line to the throne etc),nothing negative or offensive,but not in good taste I think. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dick Smith Posted January 20, 2005 Share Posted January 20, 2005 Read what I wrote. I don't think there was anything offensive or homophobic in that joke, but then I'm (notice where the apostrophe went there) not obsessed with starting troll-arguments on this forum.Do we have to put up with this, Admin? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0BRIAN WOODHEADI,m here in franceddMMyyyy0Falseen-USI,m here in franceTrue Posted January 20, 2005 Share Posted January 20, 2005 I do think that it was homophobic,in the fact that the friend was outed by peters mum,the point being that peter s friend never stayed in the bed provided and by inference stayed in the bed of peter,dicky you wrote what you think,why do you think that you are right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dick Smith Posted January 20, 2005 Share Posted January 20, 2005 Dictionary definition:homophobia (n)1 Fear of or contempt for lesbians and gay men.2 Behaviour based on such a feeling.Where is the fear and contempt in the joke?Jus' trollin'? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tresco Posted January 20, 2005 Share Posted January 20, 2005 The joke did not mock gay men for being gay. It mocked societal attitudes.Anyone who thinks the guys mum 'outed' him, the frying pan could be a good implement to apply to ones own head. You never know. It may work, help shake up the old grey matter. Whether this would work on the head of someone who compared the joke here, to the historical fact of millions of people being systematically murdered, is another matter again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hewitts Posted February 12, 2005 Share Posted February 12, 2005 Made me laugh here in Sydney too!It is a JOKE for god's sake. I go missing for months (PC trouble) only to return to find a new pain in the .... on the forum.Here in Sydney, looking forward to a time in France and enjoying jokes of all kinds.Swissbarry went missing for months, came back, posted a very funny story about BALLS, which was censored. What every happened to this previously friendly, informative forum.Bring on the frying pan I say and make it a big hard one! Baa Humbug Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave&Olive Posted February 12, 2005 Share Posted February 12, 2005 O.k. the gloves are off lets make fun of someone with say a speech impediment :- A man walks into the butchers and says " can i have half a pound of stake and kidderley please" the butcher replies " Don`t you mean stake and kidney "the man says " thats what I said didderlie" More funnies from me soon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hewitts Posted February 13, 2005 Share Posted February 13, 2005 Oh, and by the way shouldn't it be I'm in FranceWhatever happened to the proper use of the 'I don't know what they teach in schools these days, In my day blah blah blah Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swissbarry Posted February 13, 2005 Share Posted February 13, 2005 [quote]Aren't some people miserable gits? There are not a lot of forums around entitled " Jokes for Brits living in France". I for one miss Swiss Barry's stories and the like, where has he gone I wonder? K...[/quote]I am still around, and posted fairly recently on the subject of "Boules for "Foules". However, that article produced some really nasty responses, both on the forum (the same person - "Outcast" - who took umbrage at Joh's delightful joke also described my work as "smutty") and also in some really unpleasant and vindictive private messages / e-mails.I've learnt over the years that there are a lot of lovely people on the forum, but also a few who seem to delight in being objectionable, and those who try to lighten things a bit and bring a smile to people's faces aren't very well protected from them. Surely, for example, describing someone's work as "smut" is offensive, and as such is against the forum code of conduct, and as such should be subjected to censorship?I think I know what's going to happen now. This person called "Outcast", or "I,m here in France", is going to start a war of words over this posting. If so, I'll have the choice of taking him on, or rising above it all and ignoring him (or her). Hmmm. It's tempting... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hewitts Posted February 13, 2005 Share Posted February 13, 2005 Dear Swissbarry,So many of us enjoy your postings, stories, jokes.Outcast is just another of those poor souls that surface from time to time.I suppose irnore him/her/it and with any luck it will get bored and find some other forum to be a pain in the arse.EleanorSydney Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
opas Posted February 13, 2005 Share Posted February 13, 2005 Swissbarry, hope you are not implying that Outcast sent some vindictive and unpleasant emails/pms...... Hewitts, so it is ok to poke fun at gays and people with speech impediments but not Australians then?Mrs O Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teamedup Posted February 13, 2005 Share Posted February 13, 2005 Mrs O, I think that Swissbarry is saying just that. Others have said that they too have had such e-mails. I posted the last thing I had sent to me, even though what was said was not really bad, I just do not want any private communication of any sort with certain members. And for all Swissbarry's posts can be very funny, there are posts that don't amuse me, sometimes he says things that appal and sadden me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swissbarry Posted February 13, 2005 Share Posted February 13, 2005 [quote]Mrs O, I think that Swissbarry is saying just that. Others have said that they too have had such e-mails. I posted the last thing I had sent to me, even though what was said was not really bad, I jus...[/quote]Oh God, so now my posts appal and sadden someone. Please tell me, Teamed Up, exactly which posts appalled and saddened you. If I am upsetting some sensible people, I need to know where I'm going wrong. I mean, "appal" is such a strong word, isn't it. So this is serious stuff, now. I really do need to be more careful, and since I honestly can't think of anything that I've written that would appal anyone, I really need to know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0BRIAN WOODHEADI,m here in franceddMMyyyy0Falseen-USI,m here in franceTrue Posted February 13, 2005 Share Posted February 13, 2005 Firstly,hew if like you posted many moons ago you are in fact a teacher,learn to use spell check oherwise what chance do the kids have.Swissy,would you like to make clear that outcast has never sent you any PM,s,and any posting from outcast to yourself have been via the forum for any menber to see??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dick Smith Posted February 13, 2005 Share Posted February 13, 2005 Outcast - your teacher obsession is getting out of hand. You had the chance to be with them when you were a kid and manifestly failed to do so.You say "Firstly,hew if like you posted many moons ago you are in fact a teacher,learn to use spell check oherwise what chance do the kids have."Well, they could learn to punctuate, for a start...'use a spellchecker oherwise'? Irony is clearly yet another word not in your dictionary. SwissB - I also got very nasty emails when arguing with someone who couldn't spell (or punctuate) who then left the forum, temporarily... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0BRIAN WOODHEADI,m here in franceddMMyyyy0Falseen-USI,m here in franceTrue Posted February 13, 2005 Share Posted February 13, 2005 Dicky were any from outcast(in what ever guise),I will tell you now,no none were and anyone from the forum admin will have to say the same,same old smear you dont like what you hear so the dirty tricks start up,ooops there must be a labour spin doctor posting.ps dicky post them like I asked you to do with the name of the sender,maybe you could find time during your 3 months holidays that you get. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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