cajal Posted May 18, 2016 Share Posted May 18, 2016 Disclaimer # 2There will be some amongst us who, as long as they have a hole in their rear, will never 'get'the following. To be in with any chance it is necessary to have an awareness of a certain religions particular mannerisms, commands and requirements. Good luck. There was this family of Schmohawk Indians sitting around the shtetl one night. The papa, Geronowitz; the mama, Pocayenta; and the beautiful young daughter, Minihorowitz."So, nu," says the daughter, "You'll never believe.""What?", says the mama."Today, at high noon, I was proposed to in marriage.""Yes?" says the mama, "so what did you say?""I said 'Yes.'""You said 'Yes'?""I said 'Yes.'""That's wonderful," says the mama. "She said 'Yes'! Did you hear that Geronowitz? Our little Minihorowitz is getting married!""I heard," says the papa, "I'm kvelling.So who's the lucky boy?""Sittin' Bialy.""Sittin' Bialy?" says the mama, "of the SoSiouxMe tribe?""That's the one," says Minihorowitz."Oy, Geronowitz! The SoSiouxMe's! There are so many of them! How can we feed them? How can we get them all in our teepee for the wedding?""We'll think of something," says Geronowitz."Geronowitz! Get me a buffalo!""What, at this hour?""No, Geronowitz, for the wedding! I can make buffalo tzimmes from the meat, and we can make an extra teepee from the hide. Get me a buffalo!"So Geronowitz goes out to hunt a buffalo. A day goes by, and a night, and Geronowitz has not come back.Another day and another night, and still no sign of him. Another day and half the night, and Geronowitz comes home. Exhausted. Staggering. And empty-handed."Geronowitz!, I've been worried sick. Where have you been? And where's my buffalo?!""It's like this," he says. "On my first day out, I hunted high, and I hunted low, and I finally found a buffalo. But this buffalo, he made Justin Beiber look strong. It was a tiny, scrawny little buffalo, with no meat on his bones for buffalo tzimmes, and barely enough hide for a rain hat..So I settled in for the night to try again the next day."The second day, I looked high, and I looked low, from this way and that way, and I finally found a buffalo. He was a big buffalo, with lots of meat, and lots of hide, but I tell you, Pocayenta, this was the ugliest buffalo I ever saw in my life.'This,' I thought to myself, 'is not the buffalo for MY daughter's wedding.'So again, I settled in for the night to try again the next day."The third day, I got up early, and I looked high and I looked low, from this way and that way, going up hills and down hills, and I found a buffalo. It was a big buffalo. It was, as buffalos go, a beautiful buffalo. It was, if I say so myself, the perfect buffalo. 'This,' I says to myself, 'is the buffalo Pocayenta wants for Minihorowitz's wedding.'"So I reach into my backpack quietly for my tomahawk. As I tip-toe over to the buffalo I raise my tomahawk slowly over the buffalo's neck, when suddenly,like a bolt of lightning from the sky, I see it.I've brought the dairy tomahawk!" Don't say you weren't warned.regardscajal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pierre ZFP Posted May 20, 2016 Share Posted May 20, 2016 OK I admit it, I'm in the camp of 'Don't get it'I understand it aimed at Jewish practices but .....What on earth is a 'Dairy tomahawk' ?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cajal Posted May 20, 2016 Author Share Posted May 20, 2016 Ho hum, explaining a joke tends to destroy any humour in it. But as it's you Pierre I'll willingly make an exception.The set-up is that these native Americans are of Jewish descent (try googling any of the words you don't recognise). Their dietary laws forbid the use of dairy and meat in the same meal, hence he couldn't use that particular tomahawk. (Dairy tomahawk v Meat Buffalo). What should also be considered is 'Why would anyone have/need/want a dairy tomahawk?Hope that helpsregardscajal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rabbie Posted May 20, 2016 Share Posted May 20, 2016 I found the explanation funnier than the original joke but then IMHO the bar was not set particularly high. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cajal Posted May 20, 2016 Author Share Posted May 20, 2016 Hi RabbieI enjoyed it and I already new the punch-line.So all I can say is:But pleasures are like poppies spreadYou seize the flow'r, its bloom is shedOr like the snow falls in the riverA moment white then melts for everregardscajal Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pierre ZFP Posted May 23, 2016 Share Posted May 23, 2016 Groucho Marx (I think it was he) saidA joke is like a frog, if you dissect it, it doesn't work anymoreBut I appreciate the explanation - I never did understand religious dietary requirements, let alone having different tools for different foods.Anyway, it's mostly based on Leviticus, try reading it sometime, it's hilarious Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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