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17 year old stags

Just Katie

By Just Katie
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Just Katie Newbie

Just Katie

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I dont know whether I should put this in the "Lighter Side of France" or "Animals in France" or what.  My eldest child is a 17 year old son and I am worn out.  He is a really bright 6 foot 2 inch gentle giant.  He was really bright at school although he was very lazy.  He obtained 4 GCSE's A-C last summer and now he does not know what to do with his life.

Me and the man left home and got married in our teens, we had nothing!  We have both worked really hard to get where we are today.  I am afraid that my boy thinks he can ride the creast of our wave..... No way!

He is in college at the moment doing a Btec in surveying skills.  I will admit that I suggested this to him because it is a profession I know about.  He has since told me he cannot do this for the rest of his life.

As I said, he is a young stag, but I get men of 30 and 40 years approaching me and telling me how funny he is.  He is loved in male company but, I am sorry to say seems like a bit of a lazy bum to me.

Always the phone rings for him with his mates and he seems really popular but he is such a sloth.  He does what he wants, when he wants and I dont understand him.

Please any men who have been 17 in the past....   Is this normal?

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Bugsy Newbie

Bugsy

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Katie, I knew lot's of them, with two daughters our house always had it's share of young, large 'horizontal' males. Surfers were a particular type, mainly because of where we lived and as I did a bit in my youth they seemed quite comfortable with me. Don't worry, they do grow out of it, but you can help, particularly if you happen to be the 'banker'. (if you know what I mean)[:)] Money is Power.

He will find his way.......................eventually 

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Just Katie Newbie

Just Katie

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Cheers Gary, thank you for answering.  He is a cool guy but it is like living with the cuckoo chick.  My husband (his father) is a little sharp wirey kind like a black bird c ock.  The boy is a big blond thing eating us out of house and home.  He goes to college 3 days per week and gets up from bed at 1pm 4 days per week.  We are in bed by 10pm and the cuckoo is up 'till 2 am on the computer and raiding the fridge!
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Bugsy Newbie

Bugsy

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[quote user="Just Katie "]Val Doonigan?  He has got me singing the roof of the house in the mornings and he doesnt budge. [/quote]

It's starting to sound like you only have two options, buy him a wife or

...................................................wait till he's gone to college, then  move.....[:)]

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Just Katie Newbie

Just Katie

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Actually, he had made arrangements to go to Cardiff shopping with this "smart bird" yesterday but he stayed in bed instead.  College?  He told me he wanted to join the Navy.  He has all the forms but hasnt signed them yet so yesterday I thought I would give him a little reminder and said that I would buy him pie and chips if he signed the forms. I was quite surprised that he did not rise to the bait because normally he is quite a hungry little soldier.
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Just Katie Newbie

Just Katie

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He is laying on the floor in front of the telly as we speak.  He has just gone through a pack of my favourite pate.  He is breaking wind and teasing my dog resulting in my christmas tree almost toppling.  When he is bored he sits by his sister pinching her toes and making her scream (she sounds like a peacock) but somehow I dont want these days to end. 

Right lets get tough.  I would like to see him on weekends only. (I think)

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Pads Newbie

Pads

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Katie I think he sounds like a normal healthy 17 year old, cherish these days, they wont last for ever, soon he will be married and a father. His path is in front of him and he will follow it no matter what you do or dont do , say or dont say. Just dont make life to easy for him if he wants money make him work for it or he dosnt have it , he will soon find a career . or a rich wife[;-)] Its time now to be his friend and his mother relax it will all happen   
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YCCMB Newbie

YCCMB

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Katie - I have 2 of these divine creatures: one "coming out" of the phase (19) and one "going in" (16). Both of the male persuasion, and if I didn't know that our milkman is not my type, I'd swear that they were from different fathers! [8-)]

The eldest is a bit like your son, or was. He's now beginning to settle down, helped enormously by the fact that he is studying at Uni and has chosen a subject which, although it may never earn him a living, is his real passion, so he is giving it all his time and effort. However, he's been a real worry in the past, and there have been times when I've despaired......Couldn't even hold down a Saturday job, constantly out spending money he didn't have, etc., etc.. Even after his first year away at Uni, I was still concerned that one day he'd show up with an overdraft the size of the national debt of a South American country and no explanation or solution. However, he seems, in the past year, to have turned a corner, and has managed to get a job labouring on a building site during the holidays, which he also loves (!) and is managing financially and socially to get his act together. However (and some things never change) he came home yesterday for Christmas and hijacked my mobile to make his social arrangements for the evening, as he has no credit, and the thought of spending the evening at home with his parents (whom he hasn't seen except in passing for 3 months) was just too much!!

His brother is completely the opposite. He's generally very self contained and can mix socially with anyone of any age. He's had a regular weekend job for years. He longs to be a chef, and is quite happy, even now, to work evenings and weekends and to build his social life around the free time he has, rather than make it more important than his work. He stayed in last night, and wasn't really put out about it. He's not a swot, but he does more than enough to get by at college, and he's also set up his own little business with a friend designing and selling t-shirts, as well as starting to pull in a few extra pounds catering for kids' parties.............

Neither of my kids is perfect, never have been and probably never will be. I certainly wasn't and neither was TOH. Of course, we worry about them, and want them to be independent and financially solvent. If things go well, I'm hoping that they'll both be able to keep me in luxury in my old age - something the Government has decided against. I've been exactly where you are once already, and with a 16-year-old I know that I could be there again on the slightest whim of a few random bits of testosterone.............All I can say is that it will pass. I remember more than anything the words of my mum to my Aunts and Uncles (I'm the oldest cousin in my family) "They get worse as they get older". On this one, she definitely had a point!!!!![:D]

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Just Katie Newbie

Just Katie

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Thank you all for your comments.

Betty, your youngest sounds like my youngest (female kind going on 15).  Switched on and very shrewd like her father.  My son though is very kind and wears his heart fully on his sleeve even though he accidentally stamps on a few corns on the way!

Seriously though, it is the sleeping that worries me, I mean he goes to bed at 12pm and gets up at 3pm.  I remember the tiredness at that age but this is bordering ridiculous.[:(]

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YCCMB Newbie

YCCMB

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Katie, I know just what you mean. They make Rip Van Winkle look like an insomniac!! Yet now my eldest is working the most unsocial hours: 6.am. starts, or nights, and he seems to have made it on time for work without even having me on hand to turf him out of bed............ My mum used to delight in hoovering outside my bedroom door at the crack of dawn and I swore I'd never do that to my kids, however strong the temptation may have been. Literally or metaphorically, they all wake up eventually.

On the plus side, I can live without those Christmas mornings when, at 3 a.m., when you've finally dozed off after wrestling the ostrich-sized turkey into the oven at midnight and manhandling the presents out of the loft, you hear a little voice shouting "HE's BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

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Just Katie Newbie

Just Katie

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Betty, he has just this minute got up.  He asked me last night if we minded having our presents in January.  We said fine, you can have yours in January too.

He is lolling about on the settee moaning because he cannot get a lift to town.  Ah well, he said, there is no way I can get my shopping now.

This needs my action dont you agree?

Ooops he is now ringing a taxi.

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Just Katie Newbie

Just Katie

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I spent a fortune on a seafood supper last night for me, the hub and the two kids.  He sat there frowning and fiddling about with bits of lobster and shrimps and looked at me with a look of pity and confusion as he held up each piece of meat pulled from the shell. 

The oysters were gobbled up in seconds.  He had no time to savour the taste his only purpose is to fill his belly. 

Needless to say, the supper was like a race and immediately after, he wapped pie and chips into the oven, smothered it with brown sauce and fell asleep.

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