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Guests, some questions


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1. How can someone stay in your house for 3 weeks and STILL not know where basic things are, like milk or saucepans or toilet rolls?

2. Why do they bring over your favourite things, like Cheddar, and eat them themselves?

3. Where do they get those glued-shut purses from?

4. Why are they all so keen to try out the French health service?   Tell you something tho, none of them want to try it a second time!!!

But at last, it's my turn.   I've been on 2 planes today to make a start on my Guest Psychology Research.   One nice new shiny one and one old clunky one, but that's by the by.  So far so good, but I'm feeling twitchy about those unwashed dishes downstairs.  

Ah it's no good, I have to go and do them.  Somebody else will have to provide the answers.

Happy researching, everyone!    

 

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1. How can someone stay in your house for 3 weeks and STILL not know where basic things are, like milk or saucepans or toilet rolls?

A. As was sung "It's a mishterry"

2. Why do they bring over your favourite things, like Cheddar, and eat them themselves?

A. Or perhaps worse still, the few pounds of bacon that you have waited so eagerly for, for months and you can only sit and watch idly by as it eaten by the bluddy guests within a few days.

3. Where do they get those glued-shut purses from?

A. Marks & Sparks new range (sorry, it's a joke, honest !!)

4. Why are they all so keen to try out the French health service? Tell you something tho, none of them want to try it a second time!!!

A. One simply must try something that is so hyped up in the UK, so as to tell your first guests from home about the lovely care, the sparkling clean large room for two (well large for 2 skinny 2 foot midgets anyway)the wonderful stitches, so well sewn it might be one of those thingy's you do so carefully sew (sorry but I cannot deny that I am not much cop at sewing !). I have had a couple of visits, they threw me out quite early the second time, as if to say, "hold on, you've had one go, don't be so selfish, let some other Brit have a go"

Leave the dishes, don't start a trend or we will all suffer when we go back for our short sejours in UK.

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I have problems with two sorts of guests. Those that do too much and offer too much. And the others who are mean and lazy.

And there was only once when I had stuff eaten and that was  when my very good friend took her time coming down here and ate my bloody turkish delights, which was in it's own way a great disappointment.

No way anyone is getting their hands on my cheddar or sausages or anything like that. In the freezer they go and I simply don't offer them.

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Dear SB

You forgot to add leaving their driving licences in UK so that we can just 'pop' the 100 km to airport to collect them and then ferry them round for a week.  "So much better if we want to have a glass(?) of wine at lunchtime dear!"

And, its not the cheddar I mind - but drinking my dry Martini.  Why can't you buy DRY Martini in France when you can get the other sort?

Maggi

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Ah Maggi, a girl after my own heart. I can get Dry Martini here in Rennes, but I have to make a specially long journey to a far-flug hyper to get it. But that's only when I finally finish the several 1.5 litre bottles imported from Sainsbury's.

 

 

 

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SB, I would offer to send you my parents, but I'm keeping them for myself.

Not only do they know where the milk saucepan is (or would do if we had one) but they remember from one year to the next how the washing machine works and where the iron lives. Half their luggage is from cadbury's (and it's all for me!!)

For some unknown reason at least one of my kids is ill when they visist but they resist the temptation to check out the doctor's surgery and prefer to baby sit the other two while I do the waiting with a snotty/puking child (I'm going to have to work on that one)

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3. Where do they get those glued-shut purses from?

It hasn't happened to me yet this year, for example my sister just brought me 5 whole seasons of The West Wing on DVD, (we were supposed to share the cost but she waved me off), a dozen new books, ('I would have given them to someone, it may as well be you').

She more than paid for her share of food and wine costs and still hasn't cashed a cheque I wrote her in February, so overall I have no complaints about guests so far this Summer, apart from me feeling very guilty about all this

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hi,  i,m very lucky, all ! ok most of my visitors have been wonderful, and most bring gifts just for me, these include clothing , but also face cream, hand cream,eye cream, sun cream, after sun cream and body creams, and lots of them too, really appreciate it, but sometimes sit and wonder

 

                  sharon [charente maritime]

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[quote]3. Where do they get those glued-shut purses from? It hasn't happened to me yet this year, for example my sister just brought me 5 whole seasons of The West Wing on DVD, (we were supposed to share t...[/quote]

You've got series FIVE!!??

Lucky sod! I haven't found it cheap enough yet but have 1-4. Bestest series ever. Would your sister like another sister???

Dragging thread back on topic... we don't suffer from mean guests yet. It's something to do with a complete lack of roof. And doors. And windows. But I suspect it'll happen. And yes, I agree with... TU was it? If I get goodies handed over like bacon, it will go straight into a secret freezer to be gloated over after generous guest's departure.
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Hi Catalpa,

Yes I am a very lucky woman. The West Wing is fantastic - no other show like it. Series 5 seems a bit clunky though, but I have only watched it once so no proper assessent yet, and pesky visitors are here so I can't indulge myself

ps. big sis has got 5 sisters already, but you can take my evil twin off us if you like

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Totally agree!!  We've just waved off 10 family members (in-laws, I add) & I've never been so relieved!  No help whatsoever, ALL 10 taking a shower every day, 3 loads of washing EVERY day (how????) & me cooking for them all every day while they all sat outside & got pissed.  They came over in camper vans & wanted to empty the chemical loos down out toilet into the septic tank!?!?!

They bought over some foodie bits for us (cheddar, double cream, bacon, Kenco) which we paid for, then they all wanted to bloody eat it.  I told them "no way, you can eat it when you get home!"

I felt awkward asking them to give me a hand because it was my hubby's family (I would have gone mental had it been my family!) but we've both agreed that they're not coming back.  We will be 'conveniently' busy whenever they want to come back!!  Grrrrrrrrrr!!!!!

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We make it clear we are NOT WELL OFF. We take them shopping - and even our very hard up friends pay for food - because they know I love cooking so will cook it. We find a list of things we need done and send it to them before they come which is really helpful as they know what is in store before they arrive.

Be hard - it works.

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Last year, 12 year old daughter and I spent the summer holidays at our house. As husband only managed to get 10 days off work to join us at the end, one of my single, childless, friends "invited" herself to stay for a week even though she hates the heat.

I'd bought the food for her visit, as well as lots of wine (she then told me she didn't like French wine!) - when tasting one homemade dessert she accused me of trying to poison her (hopefully a joke), so next day at the market she said she fancied strawberries - she asked me to ask for them as her french was non-existent, which I did but then there was an awkward moment when neither of us moved to pay, so in the end I paid. She also brought with her a list of the "touristy" things she'd found which she wanted to do - one entailed a drive to a town about one and half hours away to visit a chocolate shop so she could take chocolates home as presents - she spent nearly £60.00 on chocolates for other people and then realised we'd need to get back to our house straight away as they would melt! She did buy my daughter a one euro lolly though!

For the whole week I taxied her around without her even offering to pay towards petrol.

Finally on the last day she said she'd like to treat me for having her by going to our local restaurant for the 11 euro lunch. However, she said I'd need to pay for my daughter! I declined. A few days after she got home, I received a parcel from her - maybe this was a "small thankyou" - it was a couple of food covers to protect food from the flies - with a note complaining about the amount of flies in the house.

She's been strongly hinting she'd like to come again this year, as she had a lovely time last year! I don't think so.

Vee

not
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[quote]Last year, 12 year old daughter and I spent the summer holidays at our house. As husband only managed to get 10 days off work to join us at the end, one of my single, childless, friends "invited" her...[/quote]

I dont understand this glued purses business.  If I was privileged to stay in anyone's house free I would be buying things all the time, how much money they have saved having free accommodation, leccy and all the trimmings. What is it with these people, they think cos we moved to France we are bluddy loaded!!!

My parents are coming next week (first time) and  the only thing I asked them to bring is their own towels as we have not been here long and there is no airing cupboard, well I was astounded when they said they did not think they had enough room. 

 We are in for a good week!!!

Georgina

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Georgina, the sales are upon us and towels are a great thing to buy in them usually. I know you said you haven't got the room, but this is what I do. The guests towels go with their bed linen, so don't take up too much room in my family cupboards. And they are left on the bed for when they arrive.
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When my son and friends use our place it is always a question of 'what do you need doing?' or suggestions for some sort of pressie. We don't take money from him, or from other friends, but they always leave a gift behind and the place well stocked. However, when some friends stayed with some of THEIR friends they had the glued-purse problem - including who bought what at the supermarket.

Life isn't long enough!
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Saligo Bay, you are not down under without letting me know are you?

Two planes - you must be somewhere a long way from your patch!

I've got a story that must cap everyones.

Guests at a bar b que - the wife picks up everything on the table and looks at the use by date before allowing her family to consume it. Mustard a little out of date I must admit. Wife inspects potatoes for "eyes" and then removes them from her childrens' plates. Then entire family give me the third degree about what is in the homemade trifle. For goodness sake everyone knows you put last weeks cake in a trifle!

Sad to say they are English and it is at times like these you wish you weren't.

Mind you after a week in Bali with witnessing "the ugly Australian" in full flight I am not sure what accent to perfect. I was with my French speaking daughter, but unfortunately mine is not that good so I couldn't hide behind that and I do have a bit of an Auzzie accent now after 39 years!!!

We have had our fair share of "guests from hell" at hotel hewitt. Don't think because you have a house in France that that is the only place that gets, "we are just popping over for a few weeks and will be in Sydney ........" How about last Christmas, two members of my family arrive and the 14yr girl has decided to become vegie the week before. Now for those that haven't visited Australia, we are a very large consumer of meat. It is cheapish, very good quality and it is just part of the culture to eat meat and lots of it.

14yr moaned constantly about not being able to buy Linda McCartney Vegie stuff in the supermarket! I lost my temper and told her and her mother, my cousin, why decide to become a vegie a minute before travelling to a meat eaters paradise!!

Wouldn't even eat Christmas dindins with the lot, turkey, goose, leg of ham, so gave her two dried up vegie sausages, the only ones I could find and I did look, honest I did.

Now I must hasten to add, I am not against vegies, just 14 yr wingeing kids, who also take at least 1/2hr in the shower despite being told we are in a drought situation and that means 5 minutes maximum. Wouldn't take advise about using 30+ sun screen either, wearing a hat etc and wondered why she had a headache and sunburn.

Two girls, Danish and Swedish, absolutely terrified of anything creepy and crawly. Barricaded themselves into their bedroom at night with a mossie net that completely covered the beds ceiling to floor and then put every piece of clothing and towels into every hole under the doors and windows they could find to protect themselves from mossies and cockroaches!!

They were not the guests from hell, I just felt very sorry for them as there is nothing you can do about Aussie creepy crawlies, you just have to accept them and get on with it!

Hotel Hewitt has had a bit of a low period recently, last visitor at least 3 months ago, but then silly me its winter here and summer there!!!! Could be the reason for the slow patch!!

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