Help - invited to a wedding!

[nectarine]

My neighbour came down yesterday with an invitation to attend his daughter's wedding in August - the card said that I was asked to attend at the ceremony at the local mairie and also for an aperitif afterwards.

Now I know this is an honour - we haven't been here for very long so it makes me feel like we are being accepted into the community - and obviously I want to get it right.

I've never met his daughter and apparently she has been living with her fiance for a long time, so it's not like they're setting up home for the first time.

I asked our neighbour to suggest a present and he seemed a little surprised and said, oh no, they didn't want a present, just us to turn up and celebrate.

I don't want to make a clanger so could anyone tell us what the correct protocol is, with regard to what one does, how long you stay afterwards, whether you buy a present and are ladies expected to wear hats?

All advice appreciated.

[Cat]

There are several threads on the subject that may help...

http://www.completefrance.com/cs/forums/1182249/ShowPost.aspx

http://www.completefrance.com/cs/forums/707753/ShowPost.aspx

http://www.completefrance.com/cs/forums/1403991/ShowPost.aspx

[Clair]

You have been invited to the vin d'honneur, where work colleagues, neighbours and distant relatives are invited to celebrate the marriage.

No hats required, just mingle and you may leave when you wish and preferably before the other guests drift off for their meal.

You do not have to offer a present, and as the bride and groom are already living together, chances are they will not have a list. But there might be an urn on a table, where guests can deposit an envelope with a cheque.

If that feels awkward, a bunch of flowers or a pot plant will also be appropriate.

[BIG MAC]

Why not dispense with all that formality and send me the money?