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How many French experiences have you done - the forum version


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I went on the Complete France home page today and there is a little quiz.... 'how many French experiences have you done' ?

http://www.completefrance.com/travel/holiday-ideas/quiz-how-many-of-these-french-experiences-have-you-done-1-5103765

Halfway through doing the quiz I gave up. It seems I have done sod all in France in the last two decades.

So that got me thinking, what 'real' experiences have you done in France ?

Here are some...

1) Had exceptionally poor customer service.

2) Nearly killed on a French road.

3) Walked in dog poo in Paris.

4) Nearly shot by the local Chasse.

5) Been to a Michelin restaurant and the food was mediocre at best.

6) Your neighbour picking a fight with you for no reason.

7) Bought a baguette from a machine.

Feel free to add to the list..
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I lied on some of the questions, because, for example my son has swam in the Calanques, but I have not......... and I have had the misfortune to eat frogs legs, doesn't matter where does it..... there were a few 'farms' round our french village.

And the Louvre, well, I am so besotted with the Musee d'Orsay, that it would always be the 'place' I would visit.

And lots of stuff, I have seen on telly.

Never bought a baguette from a machine, never buy baguettes, prefer the bigger version which were called Flutes where I used to live and I was always rather fond of a petit batard too!

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All of the above plus.

 

Have to rebuild the side wall of your house because of people continually pi55ing against it.

 

Have to paint the murets around your property with non drying paint to stop cassoces eating and drinking there before doing the above.

 

Have to regularly clear up fag ends, fag packets, bottles, cans and malbouffe pacakaging.

 

Have a neighbour lay a cable in my trailer as a moving out present.

 

Witness the drunken cassoces in the HLM fighting each other over les encombrants left out at the roadside - although to be fair I look forward to that every summer [:D]

 

I have scuba dived in les calanques though!

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Poor service? - Daily. Exceptionally poor? The "Faulty deep fat fryer" incident with Geant still makes my eye twitch when I think about it and that was about 8 years ago.

Nearly killed on a road? Does that mean I have been nearly killed? if so then daily, again. Or is it have I nearly killed someone....Once. He was an older British guy and if I hadnt been in a hurry I would have happily smashed his window, dragged him out the hole and beat him into a coma at the roadside in front of his family.

Dog poo in Paris? Confession time - I have never set foot in Paris in my life. Unless you count changing flights at CdG airport. Surprisinly there are not many dog logs to be found in my local cities.

Shot by the Chasse - a real possibility here. I avoid the woods in hunting days.

Michelin resto....nope. McDonalds is more my style.

Fight with the neighbour.....eh, not fisticuffs, but there have been some strange occurances.

Baguette vending? I dont eat much bread.

As for other suggestions, how about waiting all morning in the prefecture only for them to close for lunch just before you get your turn?

Had a "computer says no" moment at the hotel d'impots?

Been stranded by Ryanair?

Been turned away from an eaterie for daring to want food after 1.30pm?

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[quote user="NormanH"]I have never done an experience, although I have had many[8-)]

[/quote]

It's a new form of English, maybe you could give it a name, spoken by people who debate others rather than debating with them, conversely, meet with others rather than just meet them, and abuse the present continuous tense.[:)]

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