Family & friends

[Wilko]

Hello there,

So you have opened your B&B and have emailed every person you know. However included in this list are probably family and friends. Question: do they pay or not? How do you cover this slightly delicate matter?

Comments much apreciated.

rgds Wilko

 

[Coco]

Oh it's a tricky one!!!!  What we have now settled on is saying that if family and CLOSE friends ask to come, then if they come between October and March they can come for free, but if they want to come between April and September we say that it's free if no one else asks for the room, but if we have to turn down a booking because of their reservation, then we have to charge.  If they're real friends they will understand that it is now your living, and its mainly concentrated into the summer months.  We also deem close friends as those that we would have had to stay at home in England.  If they weren't close enough to stay as house guests then, they sure aren't now and just have to come as paying B&B guests like everyone else.  So far we've been very lucky (or just have good friends) but even when they have stayed out of season they have insisted on paying and if we refuse the money it is invariably "hidden" somewhere for us to find after their departure.

If we ASK people to come, then no matter what time of year, they are our guests.  However, we don't ask people to come in the summer, so that problem doesn't arise.

[Miki]

Not so tricky at all Coco, you have got it bang on.

We also decided on what you have thought and chosen to do. We simply have to charge a friend or family, if they want to holiday here in the season and when we would normally have let the room(s) Out of season, all are more than welcome, we know that family and good friends will put us up when we are back in the UK.

Old friends often tell us that the bed Tina and I use, has not been touched since we were last at their house and as much as we like to see them here, they like to see us stay with them when we are back in the UK. They all know though, that we simply have to make a charge if we lose revenue, due to them being with us. Most will come in October onwards, when we can spend time with them and normally we can tell then which dates are historically unlikley to be full.

Some of the wifes family always come out in the summer, in which case they pay for their accommodation but of course food and drink are quaffed freely and with delight !!

Yes, like you, friends and family will more often than not, insist on paying and when refused for the umpteenth time, we will invariably find some money left later in the house somewhere.

[Ian Hoare<br>All the best<br>Ian<br>La Souvigne Corrèze<br>http:www.souvigne.com]

Amazing!!!

Coco and Miki describe exactly what we do.  I didn't have a clue how to handle this, but decided that was how to play it.

In fact we have found that mixing friends/family and guests is extremely difficult. Let's face it, much of the reason they come out to US rather than anywhere else, is to be with us (incomprehensible though that may seem). So inevitably they have some hopes to spend time with us. And so, no matter how many allowances they make, any time we spend with guests is time we're NOT able to spend with them. Equally, time spent cleaning/shopping and generally looking after things is time NOT spent nattering to them.

From the perspective of the guests, there is the inevitable slight niggle "humph, it's all very well being their friends, but what about us, we're the ones paying good money to be here!" So we've not found it at all easy coping with the mixture.

We're lucky in that we have our own personal guest accommodation that (theoretically) we're not allowed ever to let out, and it's in our own house, so we can keep them physically more or less apart, but nevertheless, it's hard to spend time with both over breakfast, for example. We have HAD to say to friends that we're happy to see them for lunch and from teatime onwards, but that we have to be left alone apart from that. Really not easy at all.

Rather at a tangent, another problem for us is that I am fairly active on a number of forums to do with food and wine, and inevitably some of the other contributors want to come and visit us. Whatever do I do about the meal? Especially if I have other guests at the same time? Do I do the standard Exx menu with the standard wines (a little sad for someone who has seen me waxing lyrical about a bottle of Ch thisnthat 1989 that I have in my cellar)? I can't bounce the other clients into paying for such a wine either, nor serve them standard plonk while I regale myself and my friends with a classed growth.

What we've wound up doing is to decide that in fact money isn't everything, and that the only solution is to shut my eyes and think of England! So I do the sort of dinner party I'd do for any other wine/food lover friends, and charge ordinary customers the normal price, while my friends pay nothing. Yes we lose. But we get some fairly astonished (pleasurably) guests, when their Exx meal turns out to contain foie gras, sole etc and be accompanied by 1st growth burgundies and other great wines. I usually apologise and explain that we don't normally feed people like that, so they shouldn't count on it happening again!!

[Miki]

Ian said....." while my friends pay nothing. Yes we lose. But we get some fairly astonished (pleasurably) guests, when their Exx meal turns out to contain foie gras, sole etc and be accompanied by 1st growth burgundies and other great wines. I usually apologise and explain that we don't normally feed people like that, so they shouldn't count on it happening again"

Mmmm, sounds like our kind of place !! We must find out when your next set of friends are arriving and reserve pdq !

[mascamps.com]

If we ask them to come, it's free. If they ask to come, it's charged, but with a good discount.

We were very clear with everyone before we left the UK that this was a business and, whilst we would offer discounts, stays with us wouldn't be free because this was what would be paying all our bills and we just couldn't hand out freebies wholesale. Probably as a result of this, we haven't been innundated with friends & family as I think some others living over here have.

I'd say that they'd have problems coming in the high season but we'd be relatively laid back about them coming outside the peak months (shhhh, don't tell them!). We've also had one or two offering to come and do odd jobs around the place which might well be welcome in the high season (so long as they didn't mind taking the less good rooms).

 

Arnold