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bringing new baby home


Yvonne

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My first baby is due in the next 3 weeks or so.

I am very happy with the service and care I've received here in France and, so far, have nothing but praise for the system.

At a recent antenatal class, the midwife informed me that once I have 'completed' my 5 day stint in hospital (after the birth) I go home and there are no home visits at all.

Being in france without close family or friends, my husband and I are really worried by this. Surely, not everyone in France takes home a 5 day old baby and everything goes to plan??

Does anyone have experience of this 'follow up' or lack of? I hope I am misunderstanding something here as the thought of being so isolated / abandoned fills me with horror. This is our first baby and neither of us have experience of babies at all. Are there nurses or midwives that can be called upon for him visits / advise? I have searched our local yellow pages for 'sage femme liberalle' and there is 1 in the entire dept! Should I be looking for puericultrices?? searched for those and there don't appear to be any!

Apparently on day 3 at the hospital they give us a 'training course'?!!

Any advise / information of your own experiences in this situation would be very gratefully received as I am now starting to panic slightly....

Thanks,

Abi

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Well, I had my son 14 years ago, but I can tell you that you will get the visit of someone from the " protection maternelle et infantile" ( PMI)sooner or later. Maybe you could ask them in hospital , tell them that you wish you could soon get the visit from the PMI nurse.

In which part of France are you Abi ?

Don't panic, I'm sure everything will be fine.

XX  Régine .

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Abi!

When I had my baby at the clinic in France I was visited by a lovely voulantary Red Cross mid-wife who helped me when I was having difficulty breastfeeding.  She visited me at home too and I had her home number and could call her anytime I was worried about something.  She was very reassuring and gave me great advice.  They work with the milk bank and they encourage mums to breastfeed and if there is any 'extra' milk they come by to pick it up and often stay for a chat and help out if you're having trouble sleeping and can't keep on top of everything[:)]

You can always post any questions here too Abi - there are plenty of mums on the forum who will be delighted to be of help when your little angel arrives!

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I ve found this piece of information on the net, which confirms what I was telling you.

Une pro à vos côtés
Saviez-vous que par l'intermédiaire de votre Caf ou de la PMI de votre quartier (demandez les coordonnées auprès du personnel de la maternité avant votre sortie) vous pouvez recevoir l'aide d'une puéricultrice à domicile ? Si vous doutez de vos capacités, elle peut ainsi tranquillement vous apprendre les gestes essentiels pour vous occuper de votre bébé. Ne vous en privez pas : c'est remboursé à 70 % par la sécurité sociale. Sachez que la PMI peut également vous aiguiller vers une association spécialisée dans l'aide à domicile.

If you can't speak French , I'm sure Twinkle or Clair or I or many people on the forum could translate this for  you.

What Twinkle mentioned seems interesting too.

 

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I had my first baby here last year, and the antenatal care and care in the hospital was brilliant.

During my stay in the hospital, a paediatric nurse came in every day and bathed my baby, showing me how to clean the bellybutton, change him and how to hold onto a slippery baby in water...  She was also happy to show my husband how to do it.  If you are breastfeeding, the five days in hospital really helps - in the UK you are normally home by the time your milk comes in and having someone on hand to help you and reassure you was great - all I had to do was ring the bell and a midwife or nurse would come and help me, showing me different positions and reassuring me when the going was tough.  By the way, I could request a private room (it was a public hospital and max 2 women in a room anyway) and it cost just 30 euro a night (not reimbursed) ).  So during the five days in hospital, you do get a lot of help.

Once you left the hospital, you are on your own a bit.  But, as the others mentioned, contact your local PMI (they sent me a leaflet automatically with opening times in about month 4 or 5).  I went down there once a week to the paediatric nurse to get him weighed and could ask any other questions.  You also have access to a paediatrician if needed and sometimes to a midwife.  It is totally optional.  You also have a obligatory visits with your doctor or paediatrician - I think it is once a month for the first 3 months and our local doctor was also great help - she had followed my pregnancy till month 7 so I was really comfortable with her and she has remained my son's doctor, rather than going to a paediatrician.  You also have a 6 week check up with the gyno.

I also found the internet helpful for questions- try mumsnet.com , or there is a french mums forum on babycentre.co.uk.  The only mums group I found near me was a breastfeeding one - you can try here for links where you are  http://www.allaiter-en-haute-savoie.info/liens.html

I hope some of that helps / reassures: enjoy your last few weeks of pregnancy and your new baba.

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I had my fifth child here 3 years ago and checked myself out of the clinic on the third day even though I was expected by the staff to stay for five. I recall being asked if I would like to receive a visit from a paediatric nurse after I arrived home and agreed as it is always a good idea to have at least one visit. She came to see me when bub was 2 weeks old and rather than look over him she just asked some questions and gave me some info as to the clinic I could take him to for vaccinations etc. I think the home-visit system you have in the UK is excellent and wonder why it is not implemented here. I suppose though that the French Mums have a good family network around them at these times so get plenty of help and advice from their Mums and Nans.

Three weeks to go then...? good luck and I envy you ever so slightly (taking in the 'ouch' factor)...bubs are just scrumptious[:)]

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Hi Abi,

I appreciate your worries as when my first baby was born nearly 4 years ago, I was petrified - never changed a nappy in my life.  During your 5 days in hospital the staff are fantastic and will teach you all the basics, however, once you leave it is quite possible you will be alone unless you take steps to change it. 

The PMI will probably send you a letter with their details but if not they are in the phone book.  Go to see them, if you don't get on with the local one, go to the one in the next village or town - I have had experience of one that was awful and one that is fantastic, with the first one that was awful, I went to my GP in tears - and she was just amazing, so kind.

When I had my second baby I discharged myself a day early - much as I wanted the rest, my first child was missing me - so the hospital contacted the midwife from the PMI and she did come to see me at home.  She was great and told me to get in touch if I needed any other visits.  So the help is there, you just have to ask for it, as they expect you to have a family network on hand to help out.

Feel free to PM if you need more detailed help, as I know exactly how you feel.  Do check out www.babycentre.co.uk and go to the forums where they have a section for mums in France and they have an amazing amount of help there.

All the best

Tracy

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[:D]  Hi,

Thanks to everyone for your really helpful advise. I did hear about the PMI nurses just this week and the midwife at the hospital assures that they will visit and explain their service to my during my hospital stay.

The midwives have also explained that during the 5 days I'll get lots of help and advise which will be great.

I think you're absolutely right about them expecting most people to have a large extended family on hand.  I suppose I do, but on the end of a telephone isn't quite the same as down the road!

Thanks again to everyone. I'm trying not to worry or tax my brain too much - hoping to take each step as it comes and hoping that all will fall into place as and when necessary. I find the French health system complicated at the best of times.  I usually sit and hand over every card I have feeling confident that they'll use which ever one is necessary for a particular visit / transaction!   

Very excited now as d-day approaches - wish I'd not chosen the weeknd of 15th August though!

Abi

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u dont get a huge amount of help during the stay tbh, first day they bath the baby and I was shown how to do a nappy once ! never handled a baby before so was a bit of  a struggle, then the next day they help you to bath the baby, but we found each time a different nurse showed us a different way so we were always very nervous, they are good about breastfeeding or even bottle feeding but its very much your own your own.

Definitely contact the PMI, mine didnt contact me with my ds as he was an august baby and they were on holiday, so I contacted them in week 2, they offer free check ups, the jabs etc etc, very helpful and also babycentre parents in france forum, theres a lot of us with different experiences and help to offer, plus a good place to chat :O)

let us see the piccies after the birth :O)

hth

Pippa

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I had my first baby in London but still felt completely paniced when I brought the baby home as I felt very much on my own. I found Penelope Leach's book ' Baby and Child ' absolutely invaluable - very practical and sensible with a very useful ' when to call a Doctor and when not to ' section at the back of the book. I used to read up about each stage of development in advanceso that I'd have a rough idea of what to expect.Find a copy on Amazon or ebay - I'm sure you'll find it reassuring - it all seemed so obvious when I read it. good luck !
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  • 2 weeks later...
bonne chance - any time now....   tell us approx where you are. many some of the more experienced mums here would volunteer to visit and support you. when I had first daughter in UK, with all my mum and family all in France and Switzerland- and a husband working 120 hours per week and away 1 night in 2 - it was hard. I went home on 3rd day after a ceasarian- and didn't have a clue. but we all survived somehow- thanks to kind neighbours and a great health visitor. Don;t hesitate to ask for help, s o d  the housework, and enjoy. but if there is anybody on here nearby, do ask for their support. Only problem with support I found, is that everybody gives you different and sometimes, conflicting, advice. In the end I though, OK, I'll do what I think is best and hope for the best, and it worked. Looking forward to hear your news.

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[:D]

Hi,

Baby Yvie Elizabeth was born (2 weeks early) on 29th July!

We have now been home for 1 week after a 5 night stay in hospital. As you all said, the care and advise at the hospital was amazing. It wasn't 'in your face' but help was always on hand if needed - just the push of a button brought someone within minutes. The PMI visited me on day 1 and I've alredy called them a couple of times and visited to have Yvie weighed (she's quite tiny at 2.65kg).

My husband is also on hand as we work for ourselves so have closed our business until Christmas so we can enjoy this time together. At the moment, Yvie is very calm and placid although she does have a tendency to get over tired and then do her windmill impression with her arms. As I write, she is swaddled and fast asleep but has somehow managed to free one arm!

Thanks again for your advise, here's hoping that she remains a calm and placid baby.....if not then I feel happy now that help is out there and I know where to find it!

Abi & Yvie

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Bravo or in funny French  toutes mes ficelles de calecon (cedilla on last c) (=toutes mes felicitations).

I'm so happy for you that your husband can spend time with you. Mine really missed out bec. of his career- and I really missed his presence with us.

Enjoy - and if you get the blues at any time - we will all be here to listen and support. xxx

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Hi

Can anyone help me with the question of teats? The hospital are a bit concerned that Yvie isn't putting enough weight on. They've put her on premature formula as opposed to basic formula which should help.

They've also told us that the 'avent' teats I've been using are too tough for her to feed enough. They have recommended 'dodie' teats made from latex. Does anyone have experience of finding really soft 'easy flow' teats for tiny babies?? I've read a lot about 'nuke' too.

Any help would be really appreciated.

Thanks a million!

 

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I've seen them in the chemists, my DS hated avent teats, I'd think the chemist can get them in for you if they don't stock them and also it might be worth you trying another type, my DS hated the brown teats and refused to drink point blank whereas DD only drinks with the brown teats.

http://www.parapharmanet.com/boutique_us/liste_produits.cfm?code_lg=lg_us&type=152 have them too,

is she on a comfort milk ? if so you might need to make holes in the teats. It is a case of trial and error i'm afraid

*good luck*

Pippa

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