Rowan Posted April 29, 2007 Share Posted April 29, 2007 Hi everyone. Please dont bite my head off but I need some constructive advice with regard to our daughter.We live in Dorset UK and have 5 children between us. The youngest is now the only one left at home and has turned into the child from HELL! To cut a long story short, we now have the Social services teling us how we should allow her to smoke and drink and have all her luxuries like moile phone and playstation given back to her as her behaviour is that of "Growing up"!We have been planning a move to France with my Mother and our 3 dogs, 4 lipizzaner horses and one cat for the last 4 years and were going to wait until Lauren had finished her schooling. We now feel that we cannot carry on with the system in the UK if we are to succeed and get her back on the right track. She wanted to go into care as it is so unfair here! For those of you who think we must have done some terrible crime to her, its because I caught her in the village, smoking drugs with older kids and then she was caught leaving the school premises to have a fag with a boy! so we confiscated her favorite items and she reported us to the teachers for cruelty! Having had a report they had to follow it up and now tell us what to do!I feel that with her attitude putting her into a french school would be disastrous and would like to teach her from home and get her involved with our stud farm practise and therapy centre plus a small gite business, the farmin side she knows how to do so would be paid for it but also have lessons in life as well as education. We would integrate with the locals as much as possible as my husband does a lot of work for both the french and ex-pat property owners for renovation etc Please if anyone has embarked on teaching their own child I would love some advice, obviously it would b e far better for her to be thrown straight into the french system but lets be realistic, she is having an emotional teenage frenzy and I think she would use the language barrier (even though she speaks the basics) as a tool.Thank youRowan (going grey rapidly)! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Russethouse Posted April 29, 2007 Share Posted April 29, 2007 I think the first thing to find out is what your daughter thinks of this plan ? It's one thing if she is accepting of it (enthusiasm might be too much to expect in these circumstances) quite another if she is not.Is there a Plan B ? Perhaps an older sibling who could offer a home temporarily while she finishes her education ?My own daughter, when a teenager, memorably told me I was VERY unreasonable not taking her to see Kylie Minogue - in Japan !!!![:-))] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tresco Posted April 29, 2007 Share Posted April 29, 2007 How old is she Rowan?Were you originlly going to move when she was 16, or 18, and would she have been coming with you?I know some Brits here do home school here, but the chances of her learning French and having any kind of social life will be greatly reduced if you do. Then again if she's already a teenager she will find it hard in school too, apparently. There have been several discussions here about home schooling. I think Big Jim Bishop home schools, but he doesn't post much anymore. If you use the search box top right of the screen and search back you'll find some threads which may helpBy the way, I know it's partly what she's been getting up to socially that concerns you, but if she's into smoking fags and weed, then she'll find no shortage of youngsters here who do the same, and if that is the only thing she has in common with anyone, then that's what she may continue to do. It'll be easy social contact for her with people the same age, but not the kind you are hoping for. Just a thought. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Val_2 Posted April 29, 2007 Share Posted April 29, 2007 Tresco is right about the smoking of cannabis being rife here especially at Lycée. My son says those who partake at lunchtimes at his school are numerous and you fall all over them laid out at the back of the sports stade. The only disadvantage of home schooling I can see is the lack of communication with french speakers continually, lack of interaction with same age youngsters and being motivated for 8/9 hours per days to do the lessons. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tresco Posted April 29, 2007 Share Posted April 29, 2007 Here is one of the threads I was referring to. I tried to find more for you, Rowan, but failed, although I'm sure this has been discussed at great length in the past.http://www.completefrance.com/cs/forums/708828/ShowPost.aspx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Russethouse Posted April 29, 2007 Share Posted April 29, 2007 There are some reservations : How will your daughter ever be able to become independent of you if you will be her main company and her employer also ? It is only natural for her to want some independence - have you thought about longer term ? Sadly France has a high unemployment rate among the young. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rowan Posted May 1, 2007 Author Share Posted May 1, 2007 Hi All and thank you for your help and e mails.We seem to be getting somewhere positive with Lauren now and we have sat down and discussed all that is bothering us both (her and me and my husband) we have agreed that if she wants to be treated more like an adult these things have to be earned with a mutual respect. Funny thing is, she got the highest result in her class for her french exam last week, I didnt say a word but giggled to myself as she thinks she is hopeless at french, of course I told her that was brill etc but didnt say oh you will be fine in France then.We may have found a stud farm to buy and it has a local village with quite a few english and french children of her age living there so that is brilliant.Thanks again to all.Rowan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rowan Posted May 1, 2007 Author Share Posted May 1, 2007 Oh and that would mean Forget home schooling lolNot sure it would be a good idea and you guys helped me realise that!Schools are so much better for them and social integration.Thanks again Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blanche Neige Posted May 1, 2007 Share Posted May 1, 2007 RowanReally pleased to hear that you and your daughter have talked and are progressing in the right direction. Perhaps when you are all in France (i.e away from the comfort and ease of home) there will be a greater need to stick together and she might work with you rather than against. Changing to a Fr. school will be difficult at that age but others have weathered it.Bon courage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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