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Furry Knickers

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  1. Our postman came round on friday with his home made apple tarts at only €20! we pretended to be out and so he put his penis through the letterbox and said "if you don't want the tart you can have this for the same price" A dirty hoore if ever I saw one. Of course we refused his offer(they are far cheaper at supervalue) Do the French postmen do this sort of thing? We used to have a woman postman and she never did did anything like that.
  2. Fungi is still here! I love dolphins and turtles. I did ask the owl one in the all night pet shop if she had a Persian chipmunk I could view, she said no but she said she had a Cornish badger she would show me for an extra £50. Well it's the last time I want to see one of them! It was not what I expected at all, and it was moving in a funny way, almost as if it was feeding on something. Dog, the address is 9 Sealed Hole Lane, Polperro, Cornwall. You will be dissapointed though!
  3. Well I was just wearing normal male clothing which I always wear when going to get the bread or to any shop, but I doubt it would make any difference anyway, as it seems all dwarfs (male or female) are banned from that shop. It's not the first time this has happened in France either! I am not anything like a dwarf and maybe sometimes I look short for my height (5' 11'') but I know I shall never enter that ladies premises again. Would it be anything to do with the football? Maybe the whole dwarf incident was just a smokescreen for her not wanting us in her place, who knows indeed!
  4. This happened to me on me last visit to Normandie while buying a baguette in the local bakery. The woman behind the counter would not believe me when I told her I am not, and had never been a dwarf in me whole life. It was all to no avail and she refused to serve me and had me removed from the shop and was told never to return. Has this ever happened to anyone else on the forum?
  5. sweet 17 said "Homo sapiens" Ah no, the other ones!
  6. I have just returned from Cornwall and while there I saw a advert in the Flute Players Weekly for an all night pet shop that had opened in Polperro. It was already 2am and I just fancied buying a Persian chipmunk, so I went to address in the advert and was charged £100 to get in and was just petted all night by a large blonde woman. Why is it so difficult to obtain Persian chipmunks in England? I can't get them in Dingle either!
  7. It's much nicer just being a homo
  8. I am sure that the news of the tragic death of Eileen is already resonating throughout the whole of Ireland, France and San Marino. She sadly passed away in the early hours with her cat and budgie by her side. It is understood that her last words were "I have just scuttered meself" Eileen had been writing a book on why dogs have no pubic hair, a subject that she researched for her entire adult life, and is something that severely fascinated her and those that she called her friends. The book was to be entitled "Why Don't Dogs Have Pubic Hair". Perhaps now we shall never know the answer! Tributes have poured in from County Kildare "a grand owl woman" said Mrs Flannigan from the post office, and Pat O'Malley from Mullingar said "I shall miss her dumplings". I myself had many dealings with her and I shall never forget her. A truly great woman of our time and a true friend to me and some other people too. God bless her anyway.
  9. We saw this lad last year in Sainte Maxime, he was absolutely amazing! The best concert I have ever been to (although I have yet to go to one of Twinkles) I often dream of being able to turn into various birds and other animals and this song keeps me inspired http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vLR5YJMY3NA  [:)]
  10. I don't think it's right to flog a horse after it's died antway! Who would buy it except for a dog food factory?? I know a horse in County Kerry that has comitted suicide 3 times now, and I don't think that's right. He is now planning on going to Piran in Slovenia to make a new life for himself and Audrey (his girlfriend) He is a firm believer in reincarnation (as I am) I was once a waitress in a restoraunt in Monaco in the 1950's and quite often have flashbacks while making love to certain types.
  11. [quote user="Russethouse"] When the news of Kennedy's death came through I was doing my homework. For some reason we were not watching 'Tonight'  (with Cliff Mitchelmore, Fyffe Roninson et al)[/quote] The only Fyffe I know is the lad that makes the bananas, was that him? I have noticed that you never get banana jam. I was in a pram in Pluckerstown when I heard about Elvis. He was a lovely lad too.  
  12. [quote user="cooperlola"]Still don't like his music though, sorry[/quote] Of course not everyone liked his music, you don't have to appologise about that me little hen [:)] Shur there was some of his music that I never liked too! That scream he did with Janet, I hated that. Smooth Criminal was me favourite track of his. The video for it was amazing too.
  13. [quote user="cooperlola"] I won't remember where I was when I heard of MJ's death because his music wasnt' to my taste.  But I certainly remember where I was when I heard of Sandy Denny and Jim Clark's deaths[/quote]   Who were they? Now Michael only passed away on thursday night, so your memory can't be that bad [:)] There can't be anyone on the planet of any age that did not know who Michael Jackson was. I will never forget where I was when Pat O'Malley died. A lovely lad and he adored Cairn terriers. Of course all the scandal stories strted to break the next day. Thems the dirty hooers that work at the Kildare Weekly Horse News!
  14. [quote user="Russethouse"]I can remember where I was when Kennedy was killed, the first man landed on the moon, when I heard about Diana, 9/11, the London bombings, but when entertainers die.....????? [/quote] Where were you when Kennedy was murdered then? I am just curious! I was making extremely large love with a very lovely person in Ballinaspittle when we heard about Michael on radio Shamrock. It stopped me in me tracks, I was just totally stunned and found it impossible to resume where I left off. Michael was not just a mere "entertainer" he was the biggest superstar of all time, and there will never ever be the like of him seen again. It would be nice if his family could have a  private funeral away from the media glare.
  15. His only "flaw" was that he was so insecure about himself and that left him open to abuse by the parents of the children that saw a meal ticket! Why would any parent settle for cash if they really knew their child was being abused??? Michael was the one that was abused all his life! Is it any wonder that he preferred the company of furry creatures? Sometimes I am so ashamed to be human that I actually deny that I am one.
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