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One for Native Americans (d'ya like the segway heh?)


cajal
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Disclaimer # 2

There will be some amongst us who, as long as they have a hole in their rear, will never 'get'

the following. To be in with any chance it is necessary to have an awareness of a certain religions particular mannerisms, commands and requirements. Good luck.

There was this family of Schmohawk Indians sitting around the shtetl one night. The papa, Geronowitz; the mama, Pocayenta; and the beautiful young daughter, Minihorowitz.

"So, nu," says the daughter, "You'll never believe."

"What?", says the mama.

"Today, at high noon, I was proposed to in marriage."

"Yes?" says the mama, "so what did you say?"

"I said 'Yes.'"

"You said 'Yes'?"

"I said 'Yes.'"

"That's wonderful," says the mama. "She said 'Yes'! Did you hear that Geronowitz? Our little Minihorowitz is getting married!"

"I heard," says the papa, "I'm kvelling.

So who's the lucky boy?"

"Sittin' Bialy."

"Sittin' Bialy?" says the mama, "of the SoSiouxMe tribe?"

"That's the one," says Minihorowitz.

"Oy, Geronowitz! The SoSiouxMe's! There are so many of them! How can we feed them? How can we get them all in our teepee for the wedding?"

"We'll think of something," says Geronowitz.

"Geronowitz! Get me a buffalo!"

"What, at this hour?"

"No, Geronowitz, for the wedding! I can make buffalo tzimmes from the meat, and we can make an extra teepee from the hide. Get me a buffalo!"

So Geronowitz goes out to hunt a buffalo. A day goes by, and a night, and Geronowitz has not come back.

Another day and another night, and still no sign of him. Another day and half the night, and Geronowitz comes home. Exhausted. Staggering. And empty-handed.

"Geronowitz!, I've been worried sick. Where have you been? And where's my buffalo?!"

"It's like this," he says. "On my first day out, I hunted high, and I hunted low, and I finally found a buffalo. But this buffalo, he made Justin Beiber look strong. It was a tiny, scrawny little buffalo, with no meat on his bones for buffalo tzimmes, and barely enough hide for a rain hat..

So I settled in for the night to try again the next day.

"The second day, I looked high, and I looked low, from this way and that way, and I finally found a buffalo. He was a big buffalo, with lots of meat, and lots of hide, but I tell you, Pocayenta, this was the ugliest buffalo I ever saw in my life.

'This,' I thought to myself, 'is not the buffalo for MY daughter's wedding.'

So again, I settled in for the night to try again the next day.

"The third day, I got up early, and I looked high and I looked low, from this way and that way, going up hills and down hills, and I found a buffalo. It was a big buffalo. It was, as buffalos go, a beautiful buffalo. It was, if I say so myself, the perfect buffalo. 'This,' I says to myself, 'is the buffalo Pocayenta wants for Minihorowitz's wedding.'"So I reach into my backpack quietly for my tomahawk. As I tip-toe over to the buffalo I raise my tomahawk slowly over the buffalo's neck, when suddenly,like a bolt of lightning from the sky, I see it.

I've brought the dairy tomahawk!"

Don't say you weren't  warned.

regards

cajal

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Ho hum, explaining a joke tends to destroy any humour in it. But as it's you Pierre I'll willingly make an exception.

The set-up is that these native Americans are of Jewish descent (try

googling any of the words you don't recognise). Their dietary laws

forbid the use of dairy and meat in the same meal, hence he couldn't use

that particular tomahawk. (Dairy tomahawk v  Meat Buffalo). What should also be considered is 'Why would anyone have/need/want a dairy tomahawk?

Hope that helps

regards

cajal

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Hi Rabbie

I enjoyed it and I already new the punch-line.

So all I can say is:

But pleasures are like poppies spread

You seize the flow'r, its bloom is shed

Or like the snow falls in the river

A moment white then melts for ever

regards

cajal

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Groucho Marx (I think it was he) said

A joke is like a frog, if you dissect it, it doesn't work anymore

But I appreciate the explanation -  I never did understand religious dietary requirements, let alone having different tools for different foods.

Anyway, it's mostly based on Leviticus, try reading it sometime, it's hilarious

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