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How do you use this board?


idun
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Im probably a lurker.

We have had a place in France for 10 years now, visit as often as we can.

I love France, hope to live over there in the not to distant future and find this forum very informative re health,culture etc, probably the rules will change before I get there, but I like to keep uptodate with these things.

I dont post often, as I dont feel I have much to contribute - yet.

Also, with someone in the same position say as Cooperola, who is poorly at the moment, forums can provide daily contact with people,as good a tonic as anything.

I will continue to lurk and learn lol
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[quote user="NormanH"]And people are less 'rosy' in their view of France, and tend to b better informed.
I have also noticed a marked improvement in the  standard of French, certainly in understanding French...
[/quote]

But not in the standard of English [:D]

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BB you post though. Maybe not often, but you do post, so not a true lurker?

 

                 -----------------------------------------------

  Now to this one:

Where would the answers come from?

Answers? - There are less answers on here than you would think - there are an awful lot of opinions though, sometimes given without being asked for

 

All the answers are out there anyway. Even before the internet they were, but with the internet, there is not a thing that can be asked that isn't easy to find an answer too, other than an opinion, ie, what do you think of big screen tv's and how do you use a microwave etc etc. And I would also say that the majority who buy second homes in France or move to France are actually planning this in advance, and if they are, they have time to learn french.

Who did what we did. In around October 1980 we heard about a job. First interview a few weeks later, second in late December when the job was offered and asked if he could start in January. We were up for an adventure anywhere. We didn't know France at all or speak french and no time to learn in advance either. None of our friends knew France either then, and one offered to send me soap when I moved[:-))]

                  ----------------------------------------------

 

And Judith, what happens when you are Ć  table with friends. I used to be quite frightened when I got to France at the what later I realised, found out were quite normal debates over dinner. The shouting, the odd thump of the table to emphasise a point. The opinions, that could sound vehement, but whether the person knew one iota about the subject, would argue their cause with such vigour. There would have been a fight in England if people had been talking to one another in that way. Criticising just about the order of the day. But no, bisous, hugs and smiles as everyone was leaving and I love it.

So Judith, who do you eat with, why are the debates not heated and you are told that your opinion is wrong, even if it isn't?  It is passionate and absurd and the world is never put to rights! If it isn't like that, then you are missing out on a glorious part of french life.

And I won't say I am never offended on here, I can be, but usually not. And sometimes with these bad times we are having at home at the moment that weigh on me, I can and have been very sensitive, only because this is my recreation and relief from it all. And I now hate one poster with a passion that they might be shocked at to be quite honest.

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[quote user="sweet 17"]

[quote user="NormanH"]And people are less 'rosy' in their view of France, and tend to b better informed.
I have also noticed a marked improvement in the  standard of French, certainly in understanding French...
[/quote]

But not in the standard of English [:D]

[/quote][:D]  Yup.  There seem to be rather fewer of those....[Www]

I wonder though, Norman, if this is because so often when new posters come along they get told that unless they are absolutely fluent in French when they arrive here then they have no business moving here?

I have felt on a couple of occasions recently, Idun, that first-time posters have virtually been told to s*d off, or at the very least have been told they are idiots/have posted in the wrong place/are advocating law breaking etc etc.  At times I'm suprised there are any new members, until I feel the warmth of the forum in times of crisis, and then I remember why it is I post and what those who go off in a huff (however justified they may be in being peeved) are missing.[:)]

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My hackles rose when I read AlexH's comment about people who post 6 or 7 times a day being sad, and then on carefull reading I saw that he said "the sad alternative for me" which if I have understood him correctly is refreshingly honest, that is to say he would feel sad in that situation.

I have been called sad many times in my life and universally what was actually meant was "I could never do that, I would have to be sad to do that or would be sad doing that" which says far more about them than me someone who has lived in conditions that would be depressing for many people and continues to do so but is definitely not sad.

What saddens me are people who cannot possibly see another viewpoint other than their own, cannot identify with the situations of others and who are often very sad because they cannot get their hands on enough materialism, the thing that they believe makes them happy.

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I think forums change over time as some people lose interest and others join. It seems to me that this forum has become more of a 'chatting' place, with less of the straight 'how to' subjects than there used to be (although there are still some). Those type of topics seem to be more dealt with elsewhere.
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I can think of nothing more boring than reading/listening to opinions that were always the same as mine. I find it much more fun to discuss issues with people who have a different point of view. I guess that's why I enjoy this forum.
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Idun

You mistake my comment - in so far as I am quite happy

to discuss things and can get very heated when I get involved, but that quite a

few of the topics on the forum do not involved me in that way ... and I only

post when I feel I have something useful to say.

As for the criticism on this forum, there have been

two examples, when the tone of reply has been intended to put down or insult

the lack of knowledge supposedly shown .... this offends me greatly as I spent

most of my professional life finding information for people who perhaps should

have known the answer - but didn't. This is why I tend to stick to facts in

most of my postings...I do not do abstract thinking very often ....

It is not given to all of us to understand, for

example, the tax system, or the intricacies of the internet, TV etc .... and

sometimes we have to ask for clarification more than once .....so when someone says, you've already been

told this, when you have come back with extra questions, (which has happened to

me) it does not help the friendliness of the forum, or its continuance. 

By chance many of my friends are bi-lingual so most

often the conversations around dinner tables take place in English, with a

smattering of French, and the style of conversation then is quite different

..... I fear my French is not fully up to being able to have excessively deep

meaningful conversations in French, much though I would love to be able to do

so..... I am one of those whose understanding, reading, and writing ability is

much greater than my spoken ability ..... a result of the way I was taught.  I do know that the French do love to

discuss for the sake of it ..... and go away all happy - and I've taken part

when I can .... I do get to a weekly Rotary meeting in French but often miss

more than I'd like due to the French habit of all speaking at once ....in some

circles that would be called bad manners, here I know it's just what they do,

but it does restrict the usefulness of such interactions .

It takes quite of lot for me to get really involved

.... and it is when I feel most involved that I can argue till the cows come home,

or even, post on here!!!!

Edit: sorry - I can't get rid of the gibberish at the top ......that's what happens when you cut and paste from Word!!! Weird!..

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What an interesting question you're asking, Idun.

I'm a fairly recent member of this forum, and tend to post in the areas that interest me. I don't feel that I contribute to the practical threads, because I don't have any expertise in those areas. My OH on the other hand is a very practical and has often offered suggestions when questions are asked on subjects like renovation, DIY, plumbery or electricity. He has written too of some of our experiences to illustrate his explanations. Actually very few people acknowledge his posts, which I get annoyed about.

I read and respond in the literature, French language, culture and chitchat sections because I feel I have something to say. I must admit to being hesitant about writing when strong opinions are being expressed, sometimes because I haven't made up my mind about the subject or don't know enough, or might be thought naive. I think I might get there one day!

So, all in all this forum is my light relief. I have been known to laugh out loud when I am reading some of the repartee (and insults),  I think one of its strengths is that it encompasses a huge variety of people who have one thing in common: France.

When I was in France recentlyand had Macdonalds access to the internet only, I'm sure I was suffering from withdrawal symptoms, but I wouldn't say I've made friends on here. Maybe you need to show yourself to be a "stayer"?

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I used this board originally to gather info about moving to France and so on and so forth.

Now, it's to get the odd tip, try and help someone, come in with the odd quip here and there, but mainly to see how the regular posters are faring and to have the odd laugh.

I dare say when I do finally end all ties to my old life in France, I shall still frequent the site. If you'll still have me of course. If not, tell me to do one :)
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I think I had misunderstood you then Judith. But get stuck in with all french dinner parties, I could hardly parlez-vous at first and haltingly would say a few words to join in. They are a joy and so entertaining.......... and some people used to say that I never said anything 'nice' about France.

And we still haven't had any true lurkers posting, so disappointing.

Now I have already said that I am proscribed bananas at the moment, so no toying with them,  helas.

Although I am rather into woollies at the moment, found Woolovers.com and have bought some wonderful stuff from them.

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Well, I'm not a lurker but I'm certainly not a frequent poster and only reply to posts that I know something about or feel strongly about but that's rare as I am totally nonconfrontational. I love hearing about peoples lives, sympathising when necessary and feeling happy when things go well. I have met a few of you in the flesh and communicated with more. One special encounter for me was with Sweets as she was the catalyst for what was for me a life changing experience, namely the Camino.

So why do I read and sometimes post?  Well, you are sort of like family and as in any family, you might not agree or like some members but you have to live in harmony.  Or leave home.

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[quote user="cooperlola"]

Sorry to interupt your train of thought, Idun, but I meant to ask Sweets and Gem if they'd seen this ages ago, and forgot.

http://bravenewhollywood.com/estevez-and-sheen-walk-the-way/

She just reminded me!

[/quote]

Yes, I did!  I tried to order it in Spain with no luck so son and heir downloaded it for me.  It's a lovely story but taken huge amounts of artistic licence.  One example is when Martin Sheen had his bag stolen (plus his son's ashes) by a gypsy, the father of the said thief found the bag and returned it to MS and invited him to a celebration at their home. The home turned out to be a side street in Burgos and the gypsies were dancing around a bonfire to the Gypsy Kings music!!! I don't think so!!!  As I said, it was a gentle, heartfelt film and it was wonderful to see places we had travelled and even albergues we had stayed in.

 

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[quote user="idun"]

I think I had misunderstood you then Judith. But get stuck in with all french dinner parties, I could hardly parlez-vous at first and haltingly would say a few words to join in. They are a joy and so entertaining.......... and some people used to say that I never said anything 'nice' about France.

[/quote]

Idun,

I'd happily go to dinner parties and such with the French, just that, so far, we haven't been invited to any since we moved to our new house, and we cannot find out what is happenning all that well  in the village /town .... the same grapevine doesn't exist.   I have participated in the past, and it was one of the things I'd hoped to continue when I got here.... but tant pis!

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