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idun
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Val. Thank you for your message. It is now some years since I lost my wonderful wife but the pain is still with me.

There is very little anyone can say that will help you. Cherish the good memories, they will help, perhaps not now - but in time.

I think that you have been very brave in telling us of your loss. And I think that the opportunity of continued life for other people is a most wonderful gift.

You have my very best wishes.

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Val your bravery and courage is outstanding and I admire you enormously. And how wonderful that your husband's last gift was of a better life for other people.  As a mother I know you will be consoling and caring for your children but remember to care for yourself, too.

You are in my thoughts.  Jen

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Your strength has been witnessed by us all - thank you for the information,

and I am sure it will 'jog' a few of us into checking our cholesterol regularly. Love to you and the children, if you need anything, just shout. x
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Remember me when I am gone away,

Gone far away into the silent land;

When you can go no more hold me by the hand,

Nor I half turn to go yet turning stay.

Remember me when no more day by day

You tell me of our future that you planned:

Only remember me; you understand

It will be late to counsel then or pray.

Yet if you should forget me for a while

And afterwards remember, do not grieve:

For if the darkness and corruption leave

A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,

Better by far you should forget and smile

Than that you should remember and be sad.

Christina Rossetti

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Again, many thanks for your kind messages of support. I have over 120 e.mails on my PC needing replies from so many people on several forums, so I hope to eventually get round to replying to them. We deposited the urn in the columbarium on monday afternoon as it has to be done within days of cremation and as I mentioned previously; NO ashes may be kept on your property now via the law of 2008. Everything has moved very very fast, the inheritance stuff kicks in with a couple of days of death and the house was valued yesterday along with other items of value and of course, we have to pay for this.The bank also got involved straight away and again more costs for legalities and everything is being changed into my name and I can still access money because we had OU not ET joint accounts - suggest if you have that,get it changed or everything will be frozen for a time.

I would say that the overall cost of thefuneral and cremation and columbarium and associated fees will be around the €2000 mark.We used the local artisan menuisier/Pompes Funèbres for a more family/intimate service and much cheaper than the flash outfit in the nearby town where we would have had to pay for several workers and body storage etc. You may keep a body in cold storage in the hospital for a maximum of 6 days only, it then has to be embalmed at a further cost of approx €300 and taken to a PF where you pay for storage until burial/cremation by the day.

The system here is so different to UK deaths and funerals, people should be aware of what they maybe getting into eventually and we even had to pay for the police to visit the hospital mortuary to put a wax seal on the coffin on the last day.Fiften copies of the death certificate are supplied by do not give the cause, so if you repatriate to the UK, the paperwork will be horrendous and a UK autopsy will be required there. Flowers are expensive too, but obviously not skimped in our case as they were from the whole of the family and were beautiful. Endof the day,the local PF took care of absolutely everything and all we did was make a CD of favourite music for the obséques civile we held and sorted out our persons who spoke, which were the former and current maire, two close friends and my family in both languages. Everyone remarked how "nice" everything was especially our choice of music ending with Queen's "Who wants to LIve forever" and we even had "You'll Never Walk Alone" sung by Katherine Jenkins which lifted the spirits.
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The valuable info that Val has provided re death in France is in danger of being lost in the mists of time. Perhaps it might be a good idea to add it to the area under health which Clair has kindly put together. I know this is just a practical take on things but I reckon it will help most of us at a time when we are vulnerable. What do others think?
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[quote user="minnie"]The valuable info that Val has provided re death in France is in danger of being lost in the mists of time. Perhaps it might be a good idea to add it to the area under health which Clair has kindly put together. I know this is just a practical take on things but I reckon it will help most of us at a time when we are vulnerable. What do others think?[/quote]

I have added this to Clairs FAQ in the health section, link below. I have omitted some of the more personal comments of course.

http://www.completefrance.com/cs/forums/ShowPost.aspx?PostID=2639426

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