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You predicament reminded me of this, Norman:

The Dong with a Luminous Nose

BY EDWARD LEAR

When awful darkness and silence reign

Over the great Gromboolian plain,

Through the long, long wintry nights; —

When the angry breakers roar

As they beat on the rocky shore; —

When Storm-clouds brood on the towering heights

Of the Hills of the Chankly Bore: —

Then, through the vast and gloomy dark,

There moves what seems a fiery spark,

A lonely spark with silvery rays

Piercing the coal-black night, —

A Meteor strange and bright: —

Hither and thither the vision strays,

A single lurid light.

Slowly it wander, — pauses, — creeps, —

Anon it sparkles, — flashes and leaps;

And ever as onward it gleaming goes

A light on the Bong-tree stems it throws.

And those who watch at that midnight hour

From Hall or Terrace, or lofty Tower,

Cry, as the wild light passes along, —

"The Dong! — the Dong!

"The wandering Dong through the forest goes!

"The Dong! the Dong!

"The Dong with a luminous Nose!"

Long years ago

The Dong was happy and gay,

Till he fell in love with a Jumbly Girl

Who came to those shores one day.

For the Jumblies came in a sieve, they did, —

Landing at eve near the Zemmery Fidd

Where the Oblong Oysters grow,

And the rocks are smooth and gray.

And all the woods and the valleys rang

With the Chorus they daily and nightly sang, —

"Far and few, far and few,

Are the lands where the Jumblies live;

Their heads are green, and the hands are blue

And they went to sea in a sieve.

Happily, happily passed those days!

While the cheerful Jumblies staid;

They danced in circlets all night long,

To the plaintive pipe of the lively Dong,

In moonlight, shine, or shade.

For day and night he was always there

By the side of the Jumbly Girl so fair,

With her sky-blue hands, and her sea-green hair.

Till the morning came of that hateful day

When the Jumblies sailed in their sieve away,

And the Dong was left on the cruel shore

Gazing — gazing for evermore, —

Ever keeping his weary eyes on

That pea-green sail on the far horizon, —

Singing the Jumbly Chorus still

As he sate all day on the grassy hill, —

"Far and few, far and few,

Are the lands where the Jumblies live;

Their heads are green, and the hands are blue

And they went to sea in a sieve.

But when the sun was low in the West,

The Dong arose and said;

— "What little sense I once possessed

Has quite gone out of my head!" —

And since that day he wanders still

By lake and forest, marsh and hills,

Singing — "O somewhere, in valley or plain

"Might I find my Jumbly Girl again!

"For ever I'll seek by lake and shore

"Till I find my Jumbly Girl once more!"

Playing a pipe with silvery squeaks,

Since then his Jumbly Girl he seeks,

And because by night he could not see,

He gathered the bark of the Twangum Tree

On the flowery plain that grows.

And he wove him a wondrous Nose, —

A Nose as strange as a Nose could be!

Of vast proportions and painted red,

And tied with cords to the back of his head.

— In a hollow rounded space it ended

With a luminous Lamp within suspended,

All fenced about

With a bandage stout

To prevent the wind from blowing it out; —

And with holes all round to send the light,

In gleaming rays on the dismal night.

And now each night, and all night long,

Over those plains still roams the Dong;

And above the wail of the Chimp and Snipe

You may hear the squeak of his plaintive pipe

While ever he seeks, but seeks in vain

To meet with his Jumbly Girl again;

Lonely and wild — all night he goes, —

The Dong with a luminous Nose!

And all who watch at the midnight hour,

From Hall or Terrace, or lofty Tower,

Cry, as they trace the Meteor bright,

Moving along through the dreary night, —

"This is the hour when forth he goes,

"The Dong with a luminous Nose!

"Yonder — over the plain he goes;

"He goes!

"He goes;

"The Dong with a luminous Nose!"

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I do not drink, but a nice baked Camembert and a plate of Moules farcies à Sètoise  went  down a treat in the brillant sunshine at mid-day.

We did have 300 mm of rain Tuesday/ Wednesday though  (is that nearly a foot? )

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  Please get some help, this is not how people behave as a community.

The rest of us do not always agree, but the general rule is that we all rub along, accepting our differences.

We may be the playground, but think on this, IF we are, then where would you be, alone in a corner, because no one in real life can put up with such behaviour.

As adults it is the same in say a pub, people won't put up with it, unless they have known the person previously and know that they are not 'their usual self' and I would hope that friends and family would direct them to get some help.

So playground folks, just get on with being well rounded human beings, having a bit of fun along the way, because life wouldn't be worth living without a smile and a bit of a laugh.

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My favourite poem:

With many a curve my banks I fret

By many a field and fallow,

And many a fairy foreland set

With willow-weed and mallow.

I chatter, chatter, as I flow

To join the brimming river,

For men may come and men may go,

But I go on for ever.

I wind about, and in and out,

With here a blossom sailing,

And here and there a lusty trout,

And here and there a grayling,

And here and there a foamy flake

Upon me, as I travel

With many a silvery waterbreak

Above the golden gravel,

And draw them all along, and flow

To join the brimming river

For men may come and men may go,

But I go on for ever.

I steal by lawns and grassy plots,

I slide by hazel covers;

I move the sweet forget-me-nots

That grow for happy lovers.

I slip, I slide, I gloom, I glance,

Among my skimming swallows;

I make the netted sunbeam dance

Against my sandy shallows.

I murmur under moon and stars

In brambly wildernesses;

I linger by my shingly bars;

I loiter round my cresses;

And out again I curve and flow

To join the brimming river,

For men may come and men may go,

But I go on for ever.

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[quote user="richard51"]nomoss:

Its to do with a brook, not me...................[/quote]

Yes, I know, by Alfred Lord Tennyson, which I learnt in primary school. Except you missed out the first four verses.

Nevertheless, the punch line did seem appropriate[:D]

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