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Dave&Olive

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Everything posted by Dave&Olive

  1. Hi Ok

    Not this time the site is a scam

    Dave
  2. Hi Ok

    Has anyone used this Firm can not seem to find any feed back / recommendations for them , just do not want to get conned

    https://wel-plex.com/

    Thanks Dave
  3. Just bought some thing from ebay uk for £76 plus £15 p+p ...now just had a demand for €36 import duties ….

  4. The wife and I have just had our first jab today in Bressuire as booked on the Sante web site 2nd booked for 4th March
  5. Hi ,

    Got one for my wife and myself for 4 Feb and 2nd jab for 4 march back to back ..am today

    Dave
  6. Hi

    I want to fit a none standard exhaust to my car , It will be under noise limits for a UK car , but any one know if it will be passed at the CT in France ..by not having Mazda stamped on it

    Thanks Dave
  7. Hi Ok

    You can run 2 TV`s from one box ,by using a splitter but only the same channel ..to run 2 boxes you need 2 outputs on your LNB
  8. errrrrrrrrrrr the Euro came in in 1993 !
  9. hi they donot look that bad to me ..are they just rotting on the ends ?
  10. Your Fosse is supposed to have a crust on the top , that `s how the system works ,anaerobic digestion in the tank and aerobic in the drainage field .( hope you have not now blocked the latter ) there should be a filter on the out let of the tank pouzzolane or cinder type this is more likely the problem if the inlet is clear...in might even be on the inlet to the drainage field ..have a poke at that with a long stick

    Dave
  11. try sosh 4.99 e a month and make your calls with WhatsApp
  12. If the floor is sound , just damp proof it with a bitumen compound and screed over it .

    Dave
  13. Hi

    I would hang back ...The speed at which fiber optic is being installed is rapid in France at the moment it has just come to our remote hamlet and our BB speed has gone from 0.6 to 20

    Dave
  14. Hi Ok

    Donot let the bemoaners put you off it`s a Doable DIY job ,I live Parthenay way Chiche..

    The formulae is 145 lts per person and you must have a 3 day stock ...so 3 double bedroomed house is 6 (people ) x 145 x 3 =2610 ltr tank plus a 25m3 sand filter

    http://i83.photobucket.com/albums/j311/daveolive/Pdr_0054.jpg

    Dave
  15. mmm

     But he did not ask for rule of thumb !!

    that is the formula used by S.V.L when I put mine in ...and  a few others

      Dave

  16. hi ok

       Yes there is min size is 3000 ltrs ,  it is worked out at each person uses 145 ltrs of water per day and you must have a 3 day stock

       so for a 3 bed house = 6 people x 145 x 3 =  

      Dave

  17. [quote user="SC"]Be careful with UK table lamps that have single pole switches on the cable - change them to bi-pole. Referring to Clarke Kent's post above, if you put a French plug on it you do not know if you are isolating the bulbholder from the supply or not. No problem for you perhaps, but little fingers? Exactly why sockets are shielded. Steve[/quote]

    Hi Ok

      Sorry but you are wrong ...the way the French system works ..both the + & - are protected ..unlike the uk system when only the live is protected ..so  pos and neg can be any which way but loose

      Dave

  18. Hi Ok

      Just bought 7 " one from Carefour  on promo  It takes a 32 gb  micro card and I can plug a usb key into it  for just €89 works ok for me

                    Dave

     just a thought you have to go into memory and " mount " the key before you can use it and " unmount "  it before you can remove it

  19. God speed

     loved you and then hated you  the last 2 years I wanted you to win as much as Button ...

      just wish you a full and speedy recovery  on this your real world challenge

      Dave

  20. Hi ok

      Thanks ....looking like a plonker ...it`s  on the carte griste???

      thanks any way

      Dave

  21. Hi Ok

    Can some one say for sure when to have the first C.T.    . The car was first registered on  03/03 2011  .. and  will I get notification

      Ta Dave

  22.  

    A German guy approaches a lady of the night.

    'I vish to buy sex viz you.'


    'OK,' says the girl, 'I'll charge
    £20 an hour.'

    '..ist goot, but I must varn you, I am a little kinky.'


    'No problem,' she replies cautiously, 'I can do little kinky.'


    So off they go to the girl's flat, where the German produces four large bedsprings and a duck caller.


    'I vant zat you tie ze springs to each of your hans und knees.'


    The girl finds this  most odd, but complies, fastening the springs as he had said, to her hands and knees.


    'Now you vill get on your hans und knees.'


    She duly does this, balancing precariously on the  springs.


    'You vill please to blow zis kwacker as I make love to you.'


    She finds it odd, but figures it's harmless (and the guy is paying.)
    She finds the sex is fantastic, as she is bounced all over the room by the energetic German, all the time honking on the duck caller.
    The climax is the most sensational that she has ever experienced and it is several minutes before she has enough breath to say,


    'That was totally amazing, what do you call that position?'



    'Ah,' says the German . . 'zat is  ze....
    Four-sprung  Duck technique'

     
  23. on: “Dad, we’re learning about prisms at school. They’re fascinating.”

    Dad: “That’s good son, because as a dyslexic black boy, you’re bound to end up in one.”

    ..................................................................................................................................................................................................

    Paddy decides to take up boxing and goes for the required medical.

    A few days later the doctor ‘phones and says “Paddy, you realise you’ve got sugar diabetes.”

    Paddy says, “Nice one, when do I fight him?”

    ...................................................................................................................................................................................................

    It was hard getting over my addiction to the Hokey Cokey.

    But I’ve turned myself around and that’s what it’s all about.


    ....................................................................................................................................................................................................

     

    A Muslim bloke I work with was bragging he had the entire Koran on DVD.

    Being interested, I asked him to burn me a copy. Well, that’s when it all kicked off!

     

    ................................................................................................................................................................................................

     

    Paddy caught his Wife having an affair and decided to kill her and himself.

    He puts the gun to his head, looks at his Wife and says "Don't laugh, you're next!!"

     

    ................................................................................................................................................................................................

     

    An Irishmen wanting to become a Priest went to see the Bishop who said

    "You must answer 3 questions on the Bible".

    "1st - Who was born in a stable?"   "Red Rum" he replied

    "2nd - What do you think of Damascus?"  "It kills 99% of all germs" he replied.

    "3rd - What happened when the disciples went to Mount Olive ?"  "That’s easy" he said

    "Popeye kicked the sh*t out of them!!"

    ...............................................................................................................................................................................................

    Little boy gets home from school and says

    "Dad, I've got a part in the school play as a man who's been married for 25 years."

    His Dad replies "Never mind Son. Maybe next time you'll get a speaking part!!"

    ..................................................................................................................................................................................................

    Two Irishmen looking through a mail order catalogue.

    Paddy says "Look at these gorgeous women! The prices are reasonable too."

    Mick agrees "I'm ordering one right now"

    3 weeks later Paddy says to Mick "Has your woman turned up yet?"

    "No" said Mick "but it shouldn't be long now though. Her clothes arrived yesterday!!

    ...............................................................................................................................................................................................

    A dwarf goes to a very good but very busy doctor and asks "I know you are busy but do you treat dwarves?"

    The doctor replies "Yes, but you will have to be a little patient".

    .......................................................................................................................................................................

    In hindsight I should have posted my Facebook status as: "I've blown the head gasket on my 1997 XR3i" rather than "I've just b*******d a 14 year old escort".

    The police still haven't seen the funny side, my laptop's been confiscated, and the wife has gone off to her mother.

    ...............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

     

    Police have just released details of a new drug craze that is being carried out in Yorkshire nightclubs.

    Apparently, Yorkshire club goers have started injecting Ecstasy just above their front teeth.

    Police say the dangerous practice is called "e by gum"

     

    ..........................................................................................................................................................................................

     

    A Yorkshire man takes his cat to the vet.

    Yorkshireman: "Ayup, lad, I need to talk to thee about me cat."

    Vet: "Is it a tom?"

    Yorkshireman: "Nay, I've browt it with us."

    ....................................................................................................................................................................................................

    A Yorkshireman's dog dies and as it was a favourite pet he decides to have a gold statue made by a jeweller to remember the dog by.

    Yorkshireman: "Can tha mek us a gold statue of yon dog?"

    Jeweller: "Do you want it 18 carat?"

    Yorkshireman: "No I want it chewin' a bone yer daft bugger!"

    .................................................................................................................................................................................................

    The last is always best

    Bloke from Barnsley with piles asks chemist "Nah then lad, does tha sell arse cream?"

    Chemist replies "Aye, Magnum or Cornetto?"

  24. Happy birthday to me ,,,Happy birthday to me  ..bread and butter in the gutter Happy birthday to me

      OK lets have your worst  

     ps yes it is my birthday  14 November

          Dave [:D]

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