Pangur

[quote user="Rosebud"]   But I strongly feel that the slow hand clapping was both cruel and ignorant.  [/quote] Exactly.  I'm actually stunned that adults in a restaurant would stoop this low - cowardly and rude in the extreme.  Old ladies can be evil, eh?  If they had a problem they should have insisted the staff do something about it or have the balls to address the parents.  While I'm sure this particular child was annoying, and of course there are unruly kids about with feckless parents, but there are also a lot of people who have a lot of antagonism towards any children making any noise in public.  All very well for people saying "when I were a lad", but I'll bet not many of them were taken out to adult venues too often and if they misbehaved a good wallop would have shut them up.  Most parents don't have that option these days (thankfully so).

[quote user="Quillan"] I also agree with the statement that driving to slow causes accidents because it entices people to take risks in overtaking that they would not normally take. [/quote] Another problem with speeders is that (around here anyway) they will tailgate someone going too slow for them (i.e. at the speedlimit) and then overtake on a blind bend. They may think they are totally in control of their car and speed, but it can be frightening, and potentially dangerous, for the rest of us to see a car coming the other direction before petrolhead has finished his or her manoevre.  Of course I have sped (?) speeded (??) in the past, but it doesn't stop from me from acknowledging; that it is wrong; that the chances are that someone who knows a lot more about locales and road safety than I has determined the speed limit; and that if I get caught and fined, it is my own fault and I should just shut up and pay my stupidity tax.[;-)]    

While I can see many of the advantages of home-schooling, I am genuinely interested in how parents with no pedagogical background feel confident they can educate their kids properly the whole way through primary school (and beyond?).  How do you deal with basic skills such as writing, grammar and maths?  While child-centred learning is wonderful for some subjects, I'm not sure I'd be able to properly explain trigonometry (for example) to an 11 year old and have a suspicion that I might gloss over the subjects I wasn't too keen on in school myself[:D]  There are skills and strategies used by teachers to get children to understand how to solve problems etc - do home-schoolers generally attend formal training courses aimed at this?  

online quarrelling is also addictive, in precisely the same way Tetris is addictive. It appeals to the "lab rat" part of your brain; the annoying, irrepressible part that adores repetitive pointlessness and would gleefully make you pop bubblewrap till Doomsday if it ever got its way. An unfortunate few, hooked on the futile thrill of online debate, devote their lives to its cause. They roam the internet, actively seeking out viewpoints they disagree with, or squat on messageboards, whining, needling, sneering, over-analysing each new proclamation - joylessly fiddling, like unhappy gorillas doomed to pick lice from one another's fur for all eternity.  http://www.guardian.co.uk/Columnists/Column/0,,1788773,00.html [:D] Living France was not the only message board I thought of when I read this! As weliveinhope says, these kind of things happen on every forum - you just have to learn how to separate the wheat from the chaff and ignore the pointless posts.   

I have a prepaid Orange phone and sometimes it doesn't let me make calls abroad.  This seems to be because of the roaming partner it picks up.  If you find you can't make calls, change the network settings to another provider.  Also, be warned that using a prepaid mobile abroad is very, very expensive  as you are paying for not only the calls you make, but the calls you receive.  Your credit gets eaten in seconds!

We saw them displayed in Mr Bricolage today - I understand they are a large chain, so there might be a branch near you.

Irish catholic funerals are very like what has been described here - there is generally a "removal" the evening before the funeral, where the body is taken to the church (in rural areas especially, it will have been taken from the deceased home, where family members and friends have watched over the body for the last night or two and neighbours come to pay their respects).  The removal service gives those who will be unable to attend the funeral mass the next day a chance to pay their respects.  The funeral mass will be followed by the actual burial - as in Ireland, cremations are relatively uncommon in rural France - it's a catholic thing, apparently.  Then, a month after the death, there is often another "month's mind" mass, which is often the sunday mass dedicated to the deceased.  Of course this is changing as the country gets more urbanised and less catholic, but it sounds practically the same as the French rural funerals described here.  According to tradition, the burial should take place on the third day after the death (depending on what time the death ocurred at and there are other complications like funerals not normally being on a Sunday).  You have to move very fast to get it all organised, which is hard when you've just lost someone, but normally it seems to go like clockwork, and I suppose it helps take your mind off things. In my extended family, you always try and make the effort to go to someone's funeral - it's the normal thing to do.  Even if you don't know them well, but know a member of the immediate family, you go and pay your respects and no-one would think of anyone "intruding" unless the family have asked specifically for a private funeral.   In fact my parents have often gone to the funerals of people they have never met, but who were the parents of my friends for example.  A good turnout at a funeral is  often a comfort for the family - it reminds them that the deceased was loved and respected, had a full life with lots of friends and I suppose, that they are not alone in their grief.  I know our family has always been very touched at people making an effort to come to a funeral. My experience of British funerals was very different - I definitely felt like an intruder when I went to the funeral of my boss, and got the impression that only close friends and family attended funerals normally.  There always seemed to be genuine confusion over whether or not people should go to the funeral, which I found very surprising.  As Loiseau said, they probably won't have noticed you weren't there but I wouldn't have any qualms about going to a similar funeral in future.  

Does a tetanus shot not last for years?  Maybe they assumed he already had one. I thought lots of children got them these days as a matter of course with other jabs....

[quote user="andyh4"] My understanding is the in France as in the UK, the rescue services are provided free of charge to the victim. [/quote] If a helicopter is involved (which is possible in the mountains, winter and summer), it is my understanding that you will be landed with the bill (sometimes immediately) and the state will not cover it.   I live in the Alps and winter and summer there are helicopters rescuing skiers and mountain bikers.  If your injuries are such that they can't or don't want to move you, they'll call the helicopter in.  There also have been many cases where nonFrench skiers or bikers have had to had over their credit cards before receiving medical attention - flashing a carte neige gets over this. http://www.ffs.fr/carteneige  I normally just ask the tourist office to add the insurance onto my day passes when skiing or biking from a resort, but you can get an annual one too.   Les secours en montagne étant onéreux, la Fédération Française de Ski conseille à ses adhérents de s'assurer. Elle propose avec sa Licence Carte Neige, différentes formules d'assurances optionnelles adaptées aux besoins de chacun, à des conditions tarifaires avantageuses exclusivement réservées à ses adhérents. Ces différentes formules d'assurances offrent des garanties très complètes en cas d'accident, au cours de toute activité sportive pratiquée en montagne, l'hiver comme l'été, en France et dans le monde entier.  I assumed my carte vitale wouldn't reimburse me for helicopter rescue - I have a feeling most of the rescue services around us anyway are private companies rather than state.  Private insurance may include airlifts, but as far as I am aware and have been warned repeatedly, your carte vitale doesn't cover the helicopter.  While a European health insurance card (EHIC) - the replacement for the old E111 - can make things cheaper by letting you access medical treatment on the same terms as the locals, it won't pay for your rescue (£300 by skidoo, £2,000 by helicopter) or flights home. http://money.guardian.co.uk/travel/insurance/story/0,,1693707,00.html

You can get a "Carte Neige" from the local tourist office in ski resorts which will get you off a mountain any time of the year, including the summer.  It's about €50 pp per year and managed by the French Federation of Skiers I think.  As you say, the helicopter bill can be pretty large! We bought it for skiing in the winter winter, but apparently it works in the summer too.  Might be worth looking into...

We got the same advice from our notaire as La Vette.  Married, no kids and each own half the house.  A donation entre epoux will allow the survivor to stay in the house regardless of other inheritors if there are no children.   She saw no need for us to change our marriage regime from the separations de bien default for marriages in UK or Ireland. This website gives a summary in English http://www.notaires.fr/notaires/notaires.nsf/V_TC_PUB/SMSD-5WFENA The site also allows you to order a variety of useful booklets in French and on the first page of the English version of the site, you can download a booklet on buying or selling a home in France http://www.notaires.fr/notaires/notaires.nsf/V_TC_PUB/FRRVC_MEM

The first question is why are you paying tax and NI in the UK if you are resident in France?  My husband works for a UK company but must pay tax and social charges in France as he is permanently resident here.     I'm a frontalier, i.e. I work in one country and live in another and I can get special  insurance that allows me access the French health system without paying into the system (I pay in the country I work in).  I believe there are also exemptions if you are staying less than a year in France, in which case you are allowed pay into the UK and claim in France, but your employer needs to apply for the form on your behalf. http://www.dwp.gov.uk/international/sa29/insurance_02.asp has some useful information - EU law means you should only have to pay social insurance once.   If you are living in France permanently and are doing the work in France, in my experience, you should be paying into the French system, even if it works out more expensive (which unfortunately it does). Also, have a look in the Finance forums as there have been a lot of discussions about this kind of situation - http://www.completefrance.com/cs/forums/529229/ShowPost.aspx

My elderly neighbour gives me regular weather forecasts based on the moon's activities - I didn't realise it was so popular!  I was a bit bemused by all this moon talk at the start.  He's normally pretty acurate, in fairness. He also told us that the movements of the moon also used to govern the cutting of wood for building - he claims the wood in our roof, like all traditional roofs in our area, was cut down in winter, at a particular moon cycle and that this helps ensure the quality of wood. No, not sure how it works either.  He's very dismissive of modern building techniques...

Gluestick, that is rubbish regarding divorcées.   I know other men who think Ms means hairy-legged lesbian but there are ignorant people everywhere.  Women who call themselves "Ms" are doing is as it is none of your business whether or not we are married.  That is it.  It is not destroying language, language evolves.  I don't see too many Esq written on envelopes any more. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ms. for the orgins of Ms - it does NOT indicate divorce and I suggest you learn more about it before you start slagging people off. A woman does not necessarily want to be defined by whether or not she is married, particularly in the public sphere. You're not, so why should I be.  That is my choice, and I really don't see why it is such a big deal for you to respect my choice and to mock women like me.  It's not a "media trend", it is something that many of us feel strongly about.   

Has anyone read this book, from the other point of view: "Au secours, les Anglais nous envahissent" by José-Alain Fralon.  A french friend described it as very funny. The blurb according to Amazon Ils sont partout. Lentement mais sûrement les Anglais envahissent la France. Ici, c'est un village du Limousin, là une station des Alpes, ailleurs un bourg de Mayenne qui sont "tombés". Aujourd'hui, ils ont leurs aéroports, leurs journaux, leur pub, leur gazon, leur épicier, parfois leur épouse française. Et bien sûr leur cottage, acheté, rénové, bichonné. Phénomène nouveau, ils viennent aussi travailler et inscrivent leurs enfants dans nos écoles. José-Alain Fralon est allé sur place, en particulier dans le Périgord - la plus british de nos régions - voir comment se passe cette cohabitation entre Gaulois et sujets de Sa Gracieuse Majesté. Qui sont-ils et que viennent-ils faire chez nous ? Comment vivent-ils ? Qu'en est-il de l'amour entre insulaires et continentaux ? Les autochtones leur en veulent-ils de rafler maisons et terrains et de faire monter les prix ? Bref, comment se décline l'Entente Cordiale dans nos belles provinces. Des anecdotes, des portraits et forcément de l'humour pour raconter la vie quotidienne en "Françangleterre".  

I think we're at crosspurposes here Bassman.  I agree fully with your point about junk in junk out. However, not all statistics are collected in the same way as those you were collating at DWP, and researchers certainly don't always use the base data.  It's there as a starting point.  I can tell you that there are many independent researchers analysing stats and researching issues who are not idiots, do not have a political agenda and are only too aware of  issues just like the ones you have outlined.  If they are doing their job properly, they design a methodology to iron out as many problems as possible, and take this into account.   You can't map the world and people's opinions 100% accurately but you can get a pretty good overview.   There has to be some way of looking at the big picture.  By the way, the comment about naivety/arrogance was meant to be a general one about people's refusal to believe things that don't tally with personal experience, and not directly at you personally - sorry about that!

Sure, I agree that stats can be twisted and turned.  Bassman, I too have  worked with Dept of Work and Pensions data, specifically on IB and their internal figures are not always what I would call properly collected statistics.  Governments have their own agendas - IB being a key case in point - and the figures they produce should certainly not be taken at face value, nor analysed in a vaccum.   But I can assure you, there are a lot of independent professional researchers out there who take pride in ensuring the stats they collect are as valid as can be.   It is true, in general people know and care little about who is quoting the stats and where they are coming from. But they are usually a lot more illuminating that the experiences of say, one or two anonymous posters on an internet forum, and can help people understand that their experience is not the only valid one.  Personal experiences can add colour and depth to figures and vice versa.  To dismiss all statistics that don't agree with your personal point of view, or the views of your neighbours and the media you purchase is, in my opinion, either extremely naive or extremely arrogant.  

double post

[quote user="SaligoBay"] Maybe, but I'm still wondering how it is that clever Anglo-Saxons "know" that unemployment in France really isn't very bad at all, yet all around me in France I hear that things are very bad indeed. [/quote] Well, I suppose can often depend where you are.  From your descriptions of life, SB, it sounds like you are out in the middle of nowhere, in an area that is extremely slow.  Apologies if I'm reading this wrong, but that's what your posts sound like.  There are reasons why vibrant young people leave small towns.  It's not rocket science and it is not particular to the French. Small town life can be boring, insular, conservative in the extreme and lacking in stimulus and opportunity for the young.   People don't live in big towns and cities throughout the world just out of choice - if you want a decent job, you generally have to leave the small towns and villages.  I have lots of young, well-educated French friends in excellent jobs thoughout France, the UK and Ireland.  As in Ireland, my French friends find a few years working in somewhere like London does wonders for their CV when they return home.  Please note: they're not moving to Britain, but to London which is a totally different thing.  The French students I know are not slitting their wrists - they just don't see why they should be the butt of Villepin's autocratic re-organisation of the labour force, and striking is just how they show it.  Again, I'm not for a second saying unemployment is not a huge problem in France, but neither is it all doom and gloom for everyone.  Different people will have different perspectives.  That is why statistics  (produced by official bodies using an accepted methodology ) are useful  - they get rid of the personal perspective and allow us to see the big picture more clearly.  I have conducted research with young people living in the likes of Dagenham and Basildon.  They have no hope for the future, are living on welfare, have little to no education and the gentrification of East London and the Thames gateway only means London workers moving out and smashing any chance they ever had of getting on the property ladder.  Tell them about low unemployment and the wonders of the vibrant British economy....  Or, go to the Welsh valleys and talk to the thousands, particularly men over 50 years of age, on Incapacity Benefit.  They're not counted as unemployed by the government (handy!) and neither do they benefit from the pumping economy.   Every country has its problems - it's not just a French thing.  Italian growth is stagnant.  Unemployment is pretty high in Germany too.  I spent 8 years in England and couldn't get over how the English moaned about absolutely everything. [:P]  Giving out about a free health service while refusing to pay anymore taxes to improve it, moaning about a public transport system that went all over the city....  Some people just like whining and I don't think it's necessarily a French trait.

I was taught that Je m'excuse is actually rude as it means you are excusing yourself.  If you want to be polite, you should be asking others to excuse you, not demanding it of them[:D].  Excuse-moi, on the other hand, is asking others to excuse you.  I understood that desolé is more an expression of regret e.g.  I'm sorry you lost your hat.

In English, I use Ms as my title - as they say, why should my title be determined by my marital status?  I'm not keen on Madame, though to my anglophone ears it doesn't have quite the same conotations for me as "Mrs".  I prefer being adressed by my first name in any case and am not a big one for titles. (I know, living in the wrong country!). There are people in the anglophone world though who think "Ms" means manhater.  It's not totally accepted there, so I'm sure it would take decades more in France.  Using Madame for all is better.  From what I've experienced, men who use Mddle are either trying to be complementary, or slimy.

I came across this on a Ryanair flight and was told by the flight attendant "it's to balance the weight on the plane". ... Found it a little difficult to believe that an machine designed to fly us across the sea would be so sensitive to the body balance. More likely it's to corral all the paying customers into the one area so you don't waste time running up and down to different rows on an empty flight.

You could consider the Portes de Soleil (Morzine, Les Gets, Avoriaz).  They're within 90 mins transfer distance of Geneva, which has lots of easyjet flights from the UK.  There's been great snow for the last two years anyway, it's one of the largest linked ski areas (your husband can ski to Switzerland if he feels the need) and Les Gets is a really nice town, with lots to do for those who aren't obsessed with the white stuff.  www.lesgets.com I don't know what your budget is but if you saw the Grand Designs where they did up a ski lodge in the most amazing manner, that's in Les Gets!  I believe its about 10k for a week at Christmas, but you do get your own nanny and a chauffeur todrive you to the lifts for that [Www]. Have just realised this in in the Gite owner section, but I know there are lots of apartments in the village to hire via the les Gets site.  Most of the British run chalets do half board, which can really push the price up.   

My brother went through the exact same thing as Vervaialle's son did.  We knew he was academically able, he just disliked school and couldn't be bothered studying.  He managed to get through his Leaving Cert, floundered through the first year of  university and then suddenly woke up.  We're still not sure how or why but at the age of 20, he started to take his studies seriously, got a really good degree and is now doing fantastically in a major bank.  When he was 18 he was looking jealously at his mates who had gone the apprentice route and were earning - now he can see that it wasn't for him.  My husband did the exact same thing, and I see the same thing with many boys - they don't see the relevance of school and it's not until they're a bit older that they seem to put the work in and catch up. It probably wouldn't make a difference what country your son was in, or possibly what school.  I suppose the big thing for parents is to decide whether or not it is worth pushing them the whole way through the system in the hope that they'll mature along the way (and at least they'll have the all important qualification) or whether they are genuinely more suited towards an apprenticeship type education.  Personally, I think it's dangerous to cut off their options too young - particularly when it seems that boys don't alway know what it is they want.  Lots of luck!

Interesting article here on "declinology" in France  http://www.guardian.co.uk/france/story/0,,1741731,00.html  A similar article appeared in Le Monde a few weeks ago.