Deby

My poor kiwi guests now have 7 World cup semi tickets to sell - England v France of course! They have 4 together, 2 together and a single PM me if you are interested. Deby

Strange neighbours......invite you round to be told to go home by their friends.... and then be rude about your countrymen ....!  I thought that too! We have some lovely french neighbours and I am sure they even come out with the odd comment regarding english(irish too in our case) heritage but no more so than we regarding them being French.. We often say that is so French, but then they are! And we are so English/Irish! I will still be supporting England on Saturday, alas husband will be supporting the French.... Culture is nurtured over years.  Racism is learned.  It does make me nervous when banter gets distorted as we now live in politically correct times (which annoys me alot) but there is only a fine line between banter and insult and it doesnt take long to manifest itself, sadly.

Oh my god! What do I say to my Kiwi guests who arrivechez nous in France tomorrow.......

I hope the All Blacks win only because I like them to do the Haka and my bro is married to a kiwi... what a semi! Isnt it ironic that the French are playing the QF in Cardiff - me thinks the french believed they would win their group ...... not implying that the french are arrogant or anything :-) Am shocked England won, but well done. Deby

I know we have two opionions of moving school-aged children to France. It is good to get a balance.  I lived in France for 6 years, arrived when daughter was 1 and had my son in France.  We returned to the UK on account of poor education system in rural France as well as my belief that France's education system is antiquated - more akin to the 1950's. It depends what you want for your children. I do get nervous when families wish to 'relocate to France' in the name of a better quality of life for their children and that becomes the sole motivation/justification for the move. I love France dearly but it is incredibly hard to raise a family there.  I speak good enough French, husband is fluent and we both were employed with decent salaries.  Do people forget how difficult it is to learn a language and find a job that pays the bills.  Many French in rural France survive hand to mouth and with help from their  families, none of which newly arrived ex-pats have.  Re-location works for some people (namely retirees), but during the last 4 years I have seen countless ex-pats struggle and have to return.  It is mainly those with young families.  Do your research Darren and rent for six months first. You will learn so much during that period to discover whether it is really for you and your family, you might discover the apathy you feel with the UK may not look so bleak after all. 

Thanks Tourangelle,  I didnt know that and neither did my husband - his french is fluent!  Obviously we don't have those type of conversations :-) and our children left La France before they had time to 'refine' their language skills.  Deby

The children will go into hysterics at the sight of "Pet shop", "Pet food" etc signs. Oh, and "Soft Verges" notices always crease up the French !  Is Pet (petard) short for bum? :-) and those soft virgins should be interesting. Deby

Mishtoon, Absolutely.  Couldn't agree with you more.  I hope you will raise this teacher's bad behaviour through the relevant channels. Your post is very true and thanks for posting again. Deby

My goodness - Phil Collins with all that hair!!!

Oh so many. Personally I could never choose between David Bowie's Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars or Hunky Dory. I do like Bat out of Hell - almost like a film. Sgt Pepper. And any early Peter Gabriel. so difficult to choose, there are some more up to date good one, Definitely Maybe from Wassis! Urban Hymns - The Verve & Snow Patrol their latest. Deby  

Incidentally, the French University system is not currently well regarded internationally, with the highest rated French University placed at number 45 by world ranking. Something that the new President NS has pledged is his first priority to rectify.  And the French have a cheek to say our UK based qualifications are not worthy of theirs. A friend with a french au pair was astounded recently when the au pair believed her Licence was better than a UK masters degree 'as all french qualifications are obviously higher.'  I wonder what it is about the french that makes them believe in these things, it seems a national trait. :-) I would be nervous of introducing 13/14 years into France with no language skills. Deby

Thank you Russet House. I don't believe in molly coddling children, pandering  and allowing children 'politicall correctness in the name of free expression' and allowing justifications for bad behaviour.  I believe in good manners, good behaviour and children understanding No means No. I do not believe in adults in positions of authority screaming, shouting, pushing, hitting in order to exercise their authority and respect. Respect is earned and authority is admired. Deby

Whats your secret?  Any tips!? It is true about the residence and credit cards. So I can't see a way round it unless you don't declare.

Deby I can see why you get yourself into such situations if you truly believe I was lecturing you, I was merely saying I found your post a bit OTT, no one should even talk about punching anyone in the face for any reason in my opinion. The analogy which I used (not tried to) was the vision of two women fighting, not a pretty sight and one that I have only witnessed in Newcastle, hence it's use. Now take your own advice to Ron (his input to this forum is appreciated) and take that chill pill. Panda Tosh! Deby

Personally I find your comments Deby far more disturbing than Ron's, Of course I didn't punch her because that would have been irresponsible in front of children - I was merely expressing my frustrations and anger!!! So dont lecture me on something that was not done how dare you! The point of the post was to highlight the fact that despite emotions it is much better to keep your cool.  For goodness sake! thinking along the lines of speaking out against her actions and telling her on the spot it was wrong not making the playground look like Newcastle on ladies night.... I dont know why you tried to use that analagy - I am civilized, but emotions do run high when you want to protect your children.  Gee!

Tempting though it may be to show/demonstrate displeasure or anger, the way to win  IMHO is to go through the process absolutely correctly, never putting a foot wrong, so that the other party cannot find fault.... The above is very true.  You cannot 'lose it' in France! As soon as you do you are on the backfoot.  I have 'lost it' once with some mother in the playground who saw it fit to hit my son (c.2yrs) because he pushed her little girl over (c.2yrs) - the playground went silent and everyone shied away.  I sought the police (large French city), I ranted, I raved and the police did nothing apart from their comments on how things are different in France (fear of Foreigners). I wished I'd punched said woman in the face - bloody hard to be angry in a foreign language!  If I'd been calm and rational I'd have been taken more seriously and would have been able to Porte Plainte.  There are the processes of which there are many in France but if followed well and 'evidence' provided - oh the French love 'evidence' then I would have succeeded on this low-life woman getting her cummuppance (sp!). Ron - you need to step out of the dark ages and your comments are antagonistic!  Why do we get these stupid comments on the Forum - I guess people just like to offer differing opinions for the sake of it - you know like throwing a pebble into a pond and watching the circles/reactions!  Do people really like to go through life doing this?  For goodness sake take a chill pill and stop pontificating (sp!.!!! Deby

Haha!  I appreciated where the Newsreader was coming from and I understood why she made the protest, but she shouldn't of.  Where would we be if Newsreaders offered an opinion.  News channels can be biased as it is and taking the Newsreaders' opinion into account is a dangerous precedent. Found the hotel which I was looking for by the way. Thx. Deby

Mishtoon, my heart goes out to you on this one.  I have been in a similar position to yourself with the headmistress being aggressive, unprofessional and not acting in an appropriate manner. I looked for support from other mums, they all knew of the problems but no one wanted to challenge her in case their child was picked on even more at school.  Only one mother challenged her and she eventually removed her daughter from the school.  I removed my children too and returned to England. I totally understand your quandry as your child is leaving, but if you have the energy I would pursue this, because your child is leaving and this is a better position to be in. I would go to the Maire in your Commune and speak to them and send an official letter of complaint.  I would also send a letter to the Inspection D'Academie and copy the Maire and the headmistress too.  It is true that Headmistresses are not other teachers' bosses but some wield their role of co-ordinater with zeal, they often make life a misery for these poor teachers too. Everyone will have an idea of what is going on but alas there is usually an apathy and fear of rocking the boat - occassionaly someone does.  The mere fact that writing to Inspector d'Acadamie will put the fear of good into her as her copy book will be blotted. However, sometimes when a foreigner makes these allegations - don't be surprised that they may state that the french system is different and your expectations are different, this is when you will have to dig your heels in and be calm and professional and speak without emotion. I would do the afforementioned on a matter of principle - for the benefit of all the other poor souls and the school, but that is me.  I wish you the best.

I always check now.  Got charge 13euros once for a 2E birthday card, not to mention the 'extra' items that do seem to appear. I think it is usually wrong error codes, but it is frustrating especially when some stores insist on sealing your bag up on entry!  A good friend got charged 600Euros once for a 60 Euro shopping bill, he only noticed it when the amount was deducted from his bank account.  He spent months trying to get it back and never did.  He was a fluent french speaker and knows his droits too! Deby

I seem to remember a while ago there was a discussion with regards to great hotels to stay in Paris. One in particular caught my eye, but can't remember the name.  I seem to remember it was in the 5th and the hotel had a garden! Can anyone remember which one. Thanks   Deby

My youngest was born in December so could start Maternelle the September before his 3rd birthday.  The approach which I took was to introduce my son slowly - one morning a week, two mornings etc.  by his 3rd birthday he was doing 4  mornings 9 - 12 noon, but if he was tired then I simply wouldnt send him, if I was tired I would send him:-)!!  He only ever did mornings the whole of petit section, may be the odd day but admittedly that was very rare - only if there was a day trip.  He did enjoy being with us and generally running me ragged!  However, I was based in the sticks on the Western side of France and I think if I am correct you are based in the South East and life is definitely more active - probably are more 'people/groups around.  I think if your daughter has access to these group type situations with her mother then this would be excellent for your daughter (+ wife) too. As far as children bonding in little groups - this does take on any significance until the age 5/6.  I used to be able to watch my daughter in her school playground from our appartement balcony and used to think she was alone until I randomly selected another child and that child would be doing the exact same thing, just moving around the playground but with no one in particular. Settling in will always be different for every child no matter when they start in my opinion. Finally, if you think she is ready then she probably is, if not or are simply uncertain then she probably isn't.  Also it is a family decision as schooling affects the whole family and not just the child. Best, Deby

Excellent! Obviously been on the Wodka! Deby

Grenoble would be a great city too, it is in the Alps. Huge university town, lots of hi-tech computer people, engineers and scientists.  You would have better opportunities too. There are quite a few multi-national employers as well.  There are definitely two sides to France - the cities and then France profond - the countryside! You also get the benefit of both summner and winter seasons. Great for skiing and the summers are hot, but you can always escape to the mountains if it gets too much.   Deby

We came back nearly two years ago (passed so quickly) having spent 6 years in France.  We too were in a farming/rural community and the educational ethos was to raise people to work at either the Decheterie/chalk factory/farming.  The expectations of the community were met by the school.  We also lived in a french city and opted for privee schooling which we found infintely superior.  However, the both schools were very prescriptive and we struggled with it.  This is purely mine and my husband's opionion and what we desire for our children. When we returned, my daughter started in Year 2 and son in Reception.  My daughter really enjoyed the varied nature of subjects and the intereaction she had with her teacher and classmates.  She came home recounting all what she had learned during the day.  This first year did require alot of effort from her, we had to spend hours teaching her to write in a slightly different way, but the school never saw this as a problem. Home support was very crucial in this first year and now she is sailing along. My son has simply thrived. Both children love their school.  My advice is to prepare using the BBC resources and there are books which you can buy from WHSmith which will give your children an idea of the content. If you can give as much support to them during this transition year it will pay off.  Engage with the head and some key teachers asking for their support.  In my experience, teachers in the UK want children to learn and succeed.  Some may disagree with this point, but at least the UK system is child focussed. I am sure everything will be fine and good luck. Deby

Emma, It sounds as if you have been given a text book solution! From the limited information which you have provided it is difficult to be very objective.  However, I would be extremely wary of  believing that there is something wrong with your child in the absence of solutions from the school.  What is your gut feel about your child?  Do you sincerely believe there is an underlying medical problem? If not, then I would question what you are being told and pursue other avenues as suggested here on the forum.  How many times have we heard non-native french speakers being called lazy? I would not accept it if I thought my child was struggling with the language and the system. Go back to the school, contact the Mairie, Rectorat and show them examples of what others do and prove to them other schools/depts do things  better.  The french like nothing more than written, factual evidence. Dont give up and good luck! Deby